"Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas"

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it. This is Part 1 which contains ten chapters, and hopefully Part 2 will be along soon.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here as long as credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-06-06
Words: 1,843

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?

Notes: (See the end of the work for notes.)


Chapter 1: Sachiel vs The Germentide

There were quite a few things Shinji Ikari was having trouble with today. Such things included moving to a new city, meeting with his estranged father for the first time in three years, and being told by said father to pilot a giant robot to fight a giant alien monster. But currently at the forefront of his mind (in more ways than one) was the searing hot pain piercing through his temple like a railroad spike through his skull. Said pain was delivered via a strange energy lance wielded by the previously mentioned giant alien monster.



A final blast of searing pain shot through his head and Shinji felt a brief moment of weightlessness before he felt his (the Eva's?) back crash against something, momentum jerking him forwards briefly and making his head feel worse. The pain started to overcome him as he idly noted that he couldn't hear Misato, or anyone else for that matter, over the communicator. Consciousness began to leave him, taking in the sight of the monster looming over the city, mocking him for his failure.



"Is this how I die?" he wondered aloud, unsure if anyone could hear him. "I'm sorry, for failing everyone."

"Anta Baka?"

Near instantly, the tendrils of unconsciousness receded as the unknown voice cut through his thought process like a hot knife through butter. That voice sounded close, like it was in the entry plug with him. As his eyes refocused on his immediate environment, he found the origin of the voice. Of all the things he expected to see, two eight-inch tall red-headed girls in skintight red suits was not one of them. They were nearly identical, the only thing differentiating the two was that one had an eyepatch and a hat with roundels pinned into it. The one without the hat and eyepatch crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow.

"Anta Baka?" she repeated, her tone conveying that she expected an answer. Shinji blinked and contemplated his answer for a short moment before giving his answer.

"Yes?" He didn't mean to phrase it as a question, but between the headache and confusion regarding this situation, he really wasn't working at full mental capacity.

"Anta Baka," the eyepatched girl spoke for the first time, her voice morose compared to the other girl's tone of confidence. Her sapphire blue eye stared at him, her attention focused on his neck, he noted, before turning to face the other girl. They then begin to rapidly make gestures and pantomimes at each other, baffling Shinji even further.

"I must be hallucinating or dreaming," he spoke aloud, drawing the attention of the two red-headed tiny girls floating in LCL. "I mean, why else would I be seeing two beautiful girls calling me an idiot after nearly dying to a giant alien?" He didn't notice the two girls blush intensely at being called beautiful. Shinji chuckled a bit at the absurdity of it all. "That's right, I'm going to wake up and none of this will be real, just a crazy dream where-OW!" His rambling was cut off as the uneyepatched girl torpedoed towards him and gave him a fierce kick to his cheekbone. Okay, that pain felt real; perhaps it wasn't a dream.

"Baka!" she screamed at him as the eyepatched girl seemed to be fiddling with something on the console. "Anta Baka!?" she continued, as she glared at him while pointing at the screen that displayed the slowly approaching monster - an Angel, he now recalled after his mind was (mostly) free of the searing pain.

"I don't understand…." Her eyes narrowed as her glare intensified. "You want me to get back up and fight it?" He was met with a smile and a nod. "B-But I can't, I'll just get beaten up again, or worse…." That was obviously not what she wanted to hear, as her face twisted into a snarl, and she looked ready to go into a tirade before the eyepatched girl swam back and put a hand on her counterpart's shoulder. They stared into each other's eyes, seemingly holding a wordless conversation before both sighed and swam up to take a seat on his shoulders.

"Wh-" he tried to question before a pat on his left cheek brought his attention to the eyepatched girl, who made a shushing motion and pointed over to the girl on his right shoulder, who now wielded something that looked like a pointy red tuning fork with a spiral handle. She looked at the screen holding the visage of the Angel, and he noted some text that said 'External Speakers On' before a sonorous war cry erupted from his right shoulder.

"ANTA BAKAAAAAAAAA!"



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Misato Katsuragi started at the motionless form of Unit-01, a creeping dread filled her as she wondered if she sent out a young boy out to die. Seconds felt like hours as Unit-01 continued to remain inert, the various techs in the command center screaming out updates around her.

"Cranial plating damaged!"

"Unit-01's communications are down!"

"Pilot's synch ratio is dropping!"

Everything was going wrong, would they really lose the war against the Angels during their first battle? Would mankind fall before it could truly put up a fight? Would she be unable to get the revenge she craved?

"Unit-01's external speakers just came online!" That got her attention.

"What? Did he manage to figure out the activation procedure?" Ritsuko questioned in mild surprise.

"We can figure that out later, I want audio from that area! Shinji might be trying to tell us something we could use!" Misato was hoping Shinji managed to figure out some kind of weakness they could use to fight the Angel, however much a longshot it would be. The audio for the area was brought up, and they waited for something, anything to be spoken by the Third Child. The command center was engulfed by anticipatory silence, only broken by the footsteps of the Third Angel as it drew closer to the inert Unit-01. Finally, Unit-01's speakers emitted a voice, but not the one anyone was expecting.

"ANTA BAKAAAAAAAAA!" A shout coming from a much more feminine voice than what belonged to the Third Child emerged. The silence returned, though it was more stunned than anticipatory. Nobody was quite sure how to react, but odd rumbling served to refocus everyone.

"Is that an earthquake?"

"No, seismic sensors don't detect anything out of the ordinary."

"Oh Gods what is that?!" Attention was redoubled towards the screen as a mysterious red mass was converging towards the battle zone, surrounding the Third Angel.

"Zoom in, I was a close-up of whatever that is," Ritsuko ordered, already preparing a subroutine for the MAGI to analyze this new variable. Patching into feeds of the nearby undamaged street cameras revealed the mysterious new interloper: uncountable scores of small red-headed girls in bright crimson plug-suits wielding two-pronged spears.

"Asuka?" Misato breathed out, recognizing the visage of the Second Child from her time watching over Asuka years prior.

"The Second Child? But that's impossible! And that spear?!" Ritsuko was trying to make sense of what she was seeing and failing miserably, her tablet frozen as well. Apparently, the MAGI were also confused by this sudden development.

The sea of crimson was encroaching upon the Third Angel, who shared in the confusion of this strange situation. Unfortunately for Sachiel, showing a weakness like confusion is just an invitation for an Asuka, no matter how small, to pounce upon you. In but a single moment, the countless mini Asukas converged upon the Third Angel, striking it with their lances while screaming out a discordant warcry of "ANTA BAKA!" Sachiel, now fully aware of the threat these small creatures posed, began striking out against the red tide, its hand lances striking against the seemingly endless horde.

The NERV command center was once again stunned, this bizarre David and Goliath type fight leaving them at a loss for what to do.

"ANTA BAKA!" A victorious cry was let out as Sachiel was brought to its knees, its strikes against the crimson sea failing to do any lasting damage. Soon enough it fell to its stomach as the Asukas began to engulf it. It feebly reached out towards Unit-01, as if looking for a savior, but no help came, as soon after the Third Angel Sachiel was drowned beneath the Germentide and was defeated. With their foe defeated, the Asukas began dispersing, leaving behind a bloody stain and a very confused NERV command staff.



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Shinji Ikari, who had a front-row seat to this show, slowly blinked as he was left in the aftermath of this spectacle. His headache then returned full force with his body deciding enough was enough and promptly sending him into unconsciousness, leaving behind two concerned and irate Asukas.

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At the top of the NERV command center, Gendo Ikari and Kozo Fuyutsuki stared silently at the ensuing pandemonium following the battle against the Third Angel. Their silence continued until Fuyutsuki decided to break it.

"I don't think this bodes well for the Scenario." Gendo could only grumble in return.

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Notes:
Author's Note for Fanfiction.net | "So got the idea for this story from the AsuShin Discord Server and it wouldn't leave my head, so I needed to put it to paper, and what better time than Shinji's birthday (June 6)? I may or may not continue this story later, but for now, consider this a one-shot I pumped out to flex my atrophied writing muscles. Hope you all enjoy it, leave a review and a follow/favorite and whatnot, and have a great day."

Anta Baka: "What are you, stupid?" (Asuka's catchphrase)
Baka: "Idiot, stupid, dumb”
AsuShin: Asuka/Shinji relationship (also known as LAS: "Love Asuka Shinji")

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it. This is Part 1 which contains ten chapters, and hopefully Part 2 will be along soon.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here as long as credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-07-16
Words: 2,773

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?

Notes: (See the end of the work for notes.)


Chapter 2: Home is where the Vengeance is

The fading sunset illuminated the moving train car with a dull orange glow; the shadow in the corner encroaching further and further as the sun sank under the horizon. The SDAT in Shinji's hand turned over to the next track, filling his mind with a somber orchestral track he has heard countless times before. He stared out the window at the Tokyo-3 skyline being engulfed by the approaching night and wondered, not for the first time in recent memory, if is this a dream. Did he really receive a summons from his father after three years of zero contact, only to be told to pilot an Evangelion to fight a deadly alien monster? Did a duo of tiny redheads really appear out of nowhere after he had gotten brought low by the Angel, only to summon an army to annihilate said Angel? Would he wake up and find himself back in his room at Sensei's, where he would continue to merely exist without a grander purpose?

His musings were interrupted as a flash of lightning cracked across the twilight sky, despite there being a lack of storm clouds, and revealed he wasn't alone in the train car. In the shadowy corner there was a figure, human in shape but unnaturally featureless, its body a deep black that melded with the shadows surrounding it. Shinji continued to stare at the entity, unsure of how to act and wondering if he should flee from it. Suddenly its form shifted, revealing two glowing purple orbs where eyes would be and a wide, malicious grin shaped like the crescent moon. Their staredown continued for what felt like an eternity before the sound of the track changing on his SDAT once more broke his attention for a moment, a chance the being took to lunge at him with blinding speed.

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His eyes shot open, revealing a sterile white ceiling. His other senses began relaying more information to his brain like the smell of antiseptic, the rhythmic beep of a machine to his side, and the weight and movement(?) of something on his stomach. His brain still rebooting from the odd dream, he decided to vocalize a recent observation.

"An unfamiliar ceiling."

The movement on his stomach stopped, causing him to lift his head to take stock of his surroundings. What he found was the sight of two familiar small redheads staring at him, with a bevy of assorted office goods surrounding them and scattered about the bed he was in.

"Huh, so I wasn't imagining you two."

"BAKA-SHINJI!" Twin shouts echoed in what he could now identify as a hospital room, followed by the two of them launching at him and giving either side of his head a fierce but ultimately ineffectual pummeling. As the tiny beatdown on his skull continued, he sat up to better take stock of his surroundings, noticing nothing out of the ordinary for a hospital room, save for a security camera that was skewered with a familiar small lance. The minuscule assault upon him abated, and the two girls descended from his head and made their way to the foot of the bed, grabbing some of the office supplies that scattered during his rising and turning to look at him with their arms crossed.

"So…." he spoke up after an uncomfortably long silence. "I realized I never got either of your names?" He hoped they had names, mentally referring to them as 'the normal one' and 'the eyepatched one' would be awkward. Thankfully this seemed to light a spark in 'the normal one', breaking the air of awkwardness, as she grabbed a sheet of paper that had various doodles on it and handed it to 'the eyepatched one'. The paper was held aloft as 'the normal one' put her back to it, hands on her hips and a triumphant smirk on her face. She was surrounded by illustrations of fire and stars and bright, bold letters that dubbed her 'Leader'. Allowing a moment to bask in the glory of the situation, the newly christened Leader swiftly grabbed the paper, turned it around, and held it behind 'the eyepatched one'. On that side of the paper was just the name 'Shiki', with nothing else in the way of decoration.


Asuka Langley Soryu cosplay by Shirogane-sama (she's awesome!)


Asuka Langley Shikinami cosplay by puutin_cos

"Anta Baka?" Leader intoned with confusion as if wondering where the decorations on Shiki's side went. Shiki just rolled her eye, giving a huff of annoyance. Leader took exception to that and began to berate Shiki. Well, Shinji thought it was berating, as all the spoken words were various intonations of 'Baka' and 'Anta Baka' accompanied by exaggerated pantomiming. Still, now that he had names to the faces, he could ponder other things like what were these tiny redheads? Why were they hanging around him? Most importantly, why were there billions of them, and did they all have names he needed to memorize... oh gods the gravity of the situation was beginning to dawn on him-

Thankfully, he was brought out of his thoughts when Doctor Akagi entered the room and he shelved his dread ponderings concerning the angry Germentide for a later time. "Oh good, you're awake," she spoke with the fake warmth of a telemarketer trying to sell extended car warranties and the tiredness of a student studying for midterms fueled by nothing but cheap coffee. Her eyes fell to the foot of the bed as she glared at Leader and Shiki. "And you have visitors as well. How. Nice." Her tone conveyed that she found it anything but nice. Leader and Shiki turned to look at her, raised a hand each, and proceeded to flip Doctor Akagi the bird, then they went back to their argument. Well, Leader went back to the argument - Shiki ignored her and instead stared at Shinji. Akagi's eye twitched erratically for a moment before turning her full attention to Shinji.

"So, Shinji," she began, trying and failing to suppress the annoyance in her voice. "You're physically fine, though you might experience some residual phantom pain in your head and arm. That should fade within a day. Lucky you." The last part was muttered under her breath. "You should be fine to leave as soon as you're ready."

"Oh. Great. Uh…. how long have I been out, Doctor Akagi?"

"Eighteen hours, eighteen long hours." She sighed as she fished a cigarette out of her pocket, lit it, then took a long drag. Shinji considered asking whether it was alright to smoke in a hospital but he didn't want to bother the obviously stressed woman with his dumb questions.

"Alright, thank you, Doctor Akagi, I'll just-"

"Oh!" she exclaimed, as if suddenly remembering something. "One more thing. It's not really important, but I'd really like to know is where did they come from?!" She pointed to Leader and Shiki, whose one-sided argument had evolved into a grappling match when nobody was paying attention.

"Leader and Shiki? I-I'm not sure, they just sort of… appeared?"

"You named them?! And they can't have just appeared!" Shinji really did wish he could give her more, but that's all he knew! He tried to remember something he could give Doctor Akagi, but he had nothing. Thankfully, a familiar figure entered the room to save him.

"Lay off him, Rits, if he doesn't know, he doesn't know." Misato laid her hand on Ritsuko's shoulder and gave her a signature Katsuragi smile. "Perhaps you should get some sleep. Unraveling the mystery of the Minisukas can wait until after you've gotten some rest."

Ritsuko turned to glare at her friend. "Stop calling them 'Minisukas'! It's dumb and not going to catch on!"

"Pretty sure it already has. Don't the MAGI refer to them like that now?"

"That's because one of the little gremlins hacked the MAGI and put it there to spite me! I'll find proof they did it, I swear!"

"Sure you will, Rits." Misato began pushing Ritsuko out of the room. "But before that, why don't you go home and feed your cat, then sleep off all that caffeine and nicotine?"

"They're plotting against me, Misato! They look at me like that bitch Yuuko did back in college!"

"Mmmhhmmm, and we can discuss that when you haven't been awake for thirty hours." Misato turned to Shinji before she fully exited the room. "Grab your things and meet me in the parking lot. I'll give you a ride out of here when I've put Rits here to bed." The door closed, leaving Shinji alone with Leader and Shiki, who have since ceased their fight.

".... Better get changed first," he muttered absentmindedly, realizing he was wearing a hospital gown. He grabbed the spare clothes that someone (he'd have to find out who and thank them later) provided and made to change into them before he realized he wasn't alone. Leader and Shiki were staring at him with rapt attention, causing his cheeks to flush. "Uhhh, c-could you not look? Please?" The two of them seem to realize what they were doing and turned around, their faces red enough to match their suits.

"B-baka!" Leader shouted out in embarrassment while Shiki just pulled her hat over her face to cover her blush. Shinji just sighed as he began to change. His times in Tokyo-3 were certainly going to be interesting at the very least.

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Rei Ayanami did not dream as she slept. Dreams were a foreign concept to her, only known to her from the whisperings of her classmates. She did, however, remember when she slept. Remembered events large and small, recent and distant, human and 'otherwise'. The 'otherwise' ones were what troubled her the most. She knew she had them, she knew what they concerned, but she could never remember them when she awoke. She once brought this to the attention of Commander Ikari, but he told her not to worry unless she could definitely remember them, in which case it would be brought to his attention post haste.

"…ka." A distant voice diverted her attention from her recollections, as well as the feeling of something on her skin. There was also the faint smell of... something she was unfamiliar with. Slowly she returned to the waking world, her one uncovered eye slowly opening to reveal… a small Second Child drawing on her face with a marker. The small Second Child appeared to be done with whatever she was doing and stood back with a triumphant smirk... before noticing Rei's open eye and letting out a yelp of surprise.

"Baka!" was the word repeatedly thrown at Rei as the Second Child (small) scampered off the bed and towards the door, barreling past the feet of the nurse who was now entering, presumably to check on Rei's condition.

"Oh! Miss Ayanami...." The nurse appeared to be having trouble holding back laughter for some reason. "That's certainly a unique look for you." Rei tried to decipher what the nurse meant, but her confusion must have been evident as the nurse produced a compact from her pocket and offered it to her. "Here, this will help," the nurse explained through small fits of light giggling.

Rei took the offered compact and opened it. She had seen how to operate these esoteric tools through observation of her classmates while they were having 'girl talk' with one another (Rei had yet to decipher what this 'girl talk' was about but that was a trial for another day.). The mirror within reflected her bandaged visage, and new markings consisting of a long line above her upper lip and a triangle on her chin, both consisting of black ink. "Is this…. an attempt to imitate facial hair?" Rei's question caused the nurse to erupt into a full-blown laughing fit. This produced a new feeling in her, a pinching feeling between the bridge of her nose and her forehead. Annoyance, she surmised. Stronger than she had ever felt it before. Her mind came to the conclusion that this slight should not and would not go unanswered. She was unaware where such a previously bizarre thought came from, but that could be contemplated later.

So Rei Ayanami waited, planning, as her injuries healed. But she did not dream of revenge, for she did not dream. She would merely remember the taste of victory once she obtained vengeance for this slight.


"Revisions" by me

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"So..." Shinji started as another turn was performed in ways he was certain were outlawed by international driving law, causing Leader and Shiki to tighten their grip on his neck as they held on for dear life. "Where am I staying exactly?"

"Oh, I didn't tell you? Must've slipped my mind while I was making sure Rits didn't perform a repeat of when she wrote her college thesis." Multiple stop signs were sped past, and a few police cars looked like they started to give chase before seemingly realizing who the car belonged to and promptly abandoned the idea. "You'll be rooming with me! Neat, huh?"

"Is it normal for that to happen?" he asked, genuinely curious. He thought he heard a muffled "Anta Baka?" screamed into his neck but he wasn't entirely sure.

"Funny story, actually. You were supposed to have a room down in the Geofront, but some order got mixed up somewhere during the chaos and you were assigned to live with me." Unseen by the other two occupants of the car, Leader and Shiki exchanged a fist bump before continuing to hold on to Shinji's neck so they wouldn't be sent flying. "They said they could reverse it, but I said don't bother. A bit of company never hurt anyone." A swerve knocked Leader off his neck and caused her to dangle by his shirt collar, Shinji swiftly went to grab her before she could fall, catching her and then placing her in his shirt pocket for safety. He offered to do the same for Shiki, but she seemed content to stay attached to his neck. Leader muttered a thankful(?) "Baka" before hunkering down.

Shinji's attention returned to Misato, who had a knowing smirk plastered onto her face. "Well, it looks like you wouldn't have been alone anyway. You're pretty lucky Shinji, most guys would kill to have two pretty girls crawl all over them~"

"M-Misato!"

"Don't worry, Shinji. If you're this good at handling the small one, then the full-sized version should be easy~"

"Wait, what do you mean full-"

"And here we are!" she interrupted as the car pulled into the parking lot of an apartment complex. "Grab your things and let's get you set up in your new room!" She got out of the car, leaving behind a dazed trio. Shinji decided that it would be better to just do as she says, grabbed his bag, and began to follow Misato. Shiki was still clinging to his neck like a sailor to a piece of driftwood, while Leader was hanging limply from his pocket. There was an unspoken agreement between the three - they would never again get into a car with Misato behind the wheel unless it was absolutely necessary.

Once Shinji regained his balance, he followed Misato up to her apartment and was eagerly welcomed inside. He took off his shoes and beheld…. devastation. It was like a hurricane had torn through the place, leaving only garbage in its wake, just to taunt his inner neat freak.

"Sorry, it's a little messy-" A little? "-didn't have a chance to clean up." She paused. "Or stock up on food for that matter. Looks like we're getting takeout tonight. Any preferences, Shinji?"

"Not really…."

"Alright, how do you feel about Vietnamese food?"

"I-uh don't think I've had it before?"

"Perfect time to try it then! There's this place not too far away that has some Pho soup that is to die for. I'll go out and grab some. I shouldn't be too long, so make yourself at home!" She gave him a wide grin and left out the door before he could get a word in edgewise.

He turned to look at the devastation before him and decided exactly what he was going to do. A quick look at Leader and Shiki revealed they thought the same as they had produced tiny aprons and cleaning equipment from somewhere when he wasn't looking. They nodded at him; he nodded back. They would slay this beast, together, and free this apartment from its prison of trash. Leader and Shiki began to work as he went to find normal-sized cleaning equipment. As he searched, a single word echoed through his head that brought a small smile to his face.

Home.



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Notes:
Author's Note from Fanfiction.net | "Didn't think I get another chapter out so soon, but inspiration hit so here we are. Sorry if some characters feel a bit OOC, I haven't really got them 100% down yet. Anyway, hope you enjoyed my insanity made print, leave a review and all that.”

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it. This is Part 1 which contains ten chapters, and hopefully Part 2 will be along soon.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here as long as credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-07-16
Words: 2,649

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?

Notes: (See the end of the work for notes.)


Chapter 3: Penguins and Decoy Balloons

Shinji wiped the sweat off his brow as he tied up the last trash bag. Despite how bad it looked, it didn't take more than an hour to clean up all the errant trash around the apartment, mostly thanks to the help of Leader and Shiki. He considered tidying up Misato's room as well but he didn't want to intrude on her privacy. Also, a quick look at the room revealed it as a challenge he did not want to undertake without industrial-strength cleaning equipment. He idly wondered what was taking Misato so long as she said the place she was heading to was 'not too far'. Perhaps she had a different interpretation of 'not too far' than he did, or maybe she hit a bad spot of traffic? Shinji shuddered as he immediately suppressed all thoughts of Misato and driving, not wanting to remember what happened earlier in the day.

Leader and Shiki had already shed their aprons (where those aprons went he had no idea) and began to make themselves comfortable. Leader claimed a chair and a remote and then proceeded to start flipping through channels on the television. Shiki, meanwhile, had reclaimed her place on his shoulder, laying down with her back to his neck and her hat pulled down over her eyes, giving the appearance of taking a nap. Shinji hoped his movements wouldn't rouse her while he went to unpack his travel bag into his new room. The rest of his belongings would hopefully be arriving soon, assuming they didn't get lost on the way to Tokyo-3.

His musings were interrupted when he heard Leader shout from the living room. Shiki let out an annoyed huff but made no other motion while Shinji went to investigate. He found Leader with her lance out, menacing a- "Is that a penguin?" he blurted out in surprise, bringing the attention of the room's other occupants (except Shiki) to him. The penguin ignored Leader and waddled over to him, looking him up and down.

"Wark!" it squawked out, raising a clawed (!?) flipper towards him. Years of training on social etiquette drilled into him by his Sensei took hold as Shinji shook the penguin's flipper as if he was meeting a new business partner.

"M-my name is Shinji Ikari, s-sorry to intrude." He bowed to the penguin before realizing his mistake in doing such. From her perch on his shoulder, Shiki started to slip off due to the sudden change in incline. Acting with a speed that surprised even him, he snatched Shiki before she could fall off completely. "Oh! Sorry Shiki, are you alright?" He was surprised when an old, bitter look flashed across her face before she regained her usual morose look.

"Baka," she muttered, before motioning to him to put her down. He obliged and she proceeded to storm off into the kitchen. He stared as she left, wondering what that was all about. He stared at the penguin, who had let go of his hand at this point, in confusion.

"Wark," it offered as he patted Shinji on the back and gave him a look of understanding, before going to grab a beer from the refrigerator and then seating himself in front of the television. Shinji looked to Leader for some clarity, but all she gave him was a shrug and a look that said 'It's not my problem; deal with it yourself' before returning her attention to the television. He could only stand there and think about how bizarre his life had become in such a short time.



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Thirty minutes later, Misato had returned with the food, though not from the restaurant she had talked about. It and every other restaurant within reasonable distance were closed on account of the recent Angel attack and they had yet to reopen. Apparently, she was halfway out of Tokyo-3 before she found a Chinese place that was still open. Shinji didn't complain, though. Food was still food and he didn't mind Chinese takeout, not that he ever had much of it when he was living with his teacher.

"Honestly I'm glad they were open- '' Misato mentioned before taking a large bite of her Lo Mein. "-as the only other place open was KickDonalds, and I didn't want your victory feast to be crappy American fast food." He nodded idly, though he never actually has had any KickDonalds before so he couldn't judge if it was good or bad.

"Sorry you had to go out of your way, Misato. You didn't have to inconvenience yourself for my sake." Leader, currently in the middle of devouring a dumpling, gave him an annoyed look. Meanwhile, Shiki gave him a quick side-eye before going back to slowly eating a fortune cookie. She was still upset with him for some reason, so he made a mental note to apologize more to her later. Still, seeing two eight-inch tall girls eating comparatively oversized food was something that brought a small smile to his face. Hopefully, they'll like his cooking.

"It's no trouble at all, Shinji! You and the Minisukas saved Tokyo-3 and the world! The least I could do is get you some takeout."

"Well, I really didn't do anything aside from being hit by-" He paused, absorbing one particular part of what she just said. "Wait, 'Minisukas'?"

Misato nodded sagely. "Yeah, Mini Asukas. Like those two." She pointed to Leader and Shiki, who had seemed a bit embarrassed for some reason.

"Sorry, but who's Asuka?" The two Minisukas shot him an annoyed look but quickly went back to their food.

"She's the Second Child, pilot of Eva unit 02. The Minisukas look, and mostly act, exactly like she does."

"Oh, are they tiny clones of her or something like that?" Unseen by everyone else at the table, Shiki froze for a short moment and then returned to her cookie, but with her posture notably stiffer.

"Interesting theory, Shinji, but I wouldn't bet on it. We don't actually know where the Minisukas came from. That's why Rits was asking you what you knew about that." Misato drummed her fingers against her beer can idly. "As far as we can tell, they first appeared in your entry plug, which caused a lot of confusion, and they aren't exactly explaining where they came from."

"Anta Baka."

Misato nodded in understanding. "That's right. But as far as I'm concerned, as long as they keep up their excellent help in dealing with the Angels, they could come from anywhere and I wouldn't have a problem." She punctuated this by downing the rest of her (mostly empty) beer.


Misato Katsuragi art by @yohan1754

Not knowing how to continue this particular thread of conversation, Shinji decided to inquire about the avian he saw previously. "So, uh, I saw a penguin earlier…"

"Oh, you met PenPen! He's our other roommate, so get along with him." She went to grab another beer while continuing. "He makes use of the bath sometimes, so check before you enter." He nodded in understanding; he wouldn't want to be rude to a new roommate by interrupting them. Shinji blinked in surprise at how quickly he accepted a penguin as his new roommate. A grumble from Shiki derailed his train of thought. She was glaring in annoyance at the bathroom before blushing and looking away.

Misato continued, not noticing Shiki's actions. "That reminds me. We'll be heading down to NERV for the next few days to get you ready for piloting - like some sync tests, measuring you for a plug suit, getting you a proper ID, some fourth thing Rits mumbled out that I couldn't hear." Misato paused, deep in thought as she imbibed her beer like an alcoholic philosopher. "Oh, and I'll drive you around Tokyo-3 so you can get a feel for the place." Shinji, Leader, and Shiki froze when the word drive emerged from her mouth like the sound of trumpets on Judgment Day.

"Y-you don't have to trouble yourself to drive us, Misato. I can just walk-"

"It's no trouble at all, Shinji. After all, we both go to and from the same place, so it's convenient!" Damn her and her logic; how was he supposed to refute that!? Shinji looked to Leader and Shiki for help, but they seemed like they were trying to figure out a way to stop it themselves. He had to think quickly if he was going to get through this - there was no running away!

"C-could it be a slow drive?" he tried, hoping Misato would get the message. She tapped her chin in consideration before nodding.

"So you like to go slow and take everything in at a leisurely pace, huh? I can respect that. Sure, a casual, slow drive around Tokyo-3 it is." Three sighs of relief were let out as the crisis was averted. He gathered his dishes and deposited them in the sink, feeling it best to turn in for the night before he had to defuse any more bombs.

"Good night, Shinji!" Misato called out, seemingly sensing his intentions. He mumbled out a thanks as the energy seemed to drain from his body, sedately heading to his new room. He contemplated taking a bath but he didn't trust himself not to fall asleep, so that was out of the question. He unceremoniously plopped down on his futon and stared at the unfamiliar ceiling above him. He wondered if the coming days would be as hectic and unpredictable as the last two, hoping to have some quiet days ahead of him. As the tendrils of sleep began to overtake him a small part of him wished for some more excitement to color his lonely days. For the first time in a long while, a small smile made its way to Shinji's face as he entered the realm of dreams.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For once, Misato was right; sleep really did do wonders for her. Not that Ritsuko would tell her that - she really didn't want to hear the 'I told you so' from her friend's mouth, no matter how deserved. She also had other things to worry about right now, like the Commander and Sub-Commander in front of her currently waiting for a report on these…. 'Minisukas'.

"As far as we can tell, there is nothing Angelic about them, and they seem to not be…. overtly hostile towards NERV staff."

"But they are hostile?" Fuyutsuki inquired.

She shrugged. "They only physically retaliate if they are approached with hostility, something Section 2 found out the hard way when trying to capture one. Otherwise, they just act as minor nuisances, pulling pranks, defacing public property, making obscene gestures, and stealing nonessential supplies."

Gendo had to suppress an annoyed huff at the memory of Rei trying to question him about 'enacting vengeance for the slight committed against her'. It was a bit much for just a marker mustache, but if it didn't affect his plans, he would allow Rei this distraction.



"What kind of supplies did they steal?" Fuyutsuki inquired. Gendo didn't see the point in asking, but he supposed that he could use it as an excuse to request an increase in budget from the Old Men. He almost chuckled at the fact they were panicking at the arrival of the army of small Second Children and the damage that would do to their Scenario.

"Mostly office supplies, spare parts, and the 1:1 scale Unit 01 inflatable decoy balloon."

Gendo's surprised blink was hidden by his glasses; he didn't remember approving that.

Fuyutsuki was also confused, but he voiced it. "We have a Unit 01 decoy balloon?"

"Yes. It's more of a proof of concept than anything, in case we needed a decoy."



"This is irrelevant. Return to the topic of the small Second Children army, particularly their lances," Gendo intoned. Akagi blinked before resuming.

"Of course. While we haven't retrieved a sample for study, the MAGI predicts the smaller lances are roughly seventy to eighty percent similar to their larger counterpart based on latent energy readings, though we would need an actual sample for study to confirm it."

"Leave it. We best not invoke their ire for the time being. An opportunity will present itself if we are patient. The Scenario moves unimpeded for the time being." Gendo paused for a moment to let his words sink in. "What of the Third Child?"

'Do you actually care?' Akagi thought dryly but didn't voice. "No lasting damage from the fight with the Angel and he is coming in later for a preliminary sync test. Though two of the…. small Second Children seemed to have attached themselves to him."

"A sort of honor guard? Considering they appeared to protect him from the Third Angel, this might indicate he may be some sort of a VIP to them?" Fuyutsuki pondered aloud, his old academic mindset shaking off the cobwebs.

"If so, he could be used to control them and ensure that they don't act against us," Gendo surmised, already altering, discarding, and creating new facets to his Scenario to account for this new possibility. "Have the MAGI keep track of any they find and what actions they take. They will be codenamed 'Ishim', except the ones that appear to have a higher ranking, like the ones that are attached to the Third Child. They will be codenamed 'Cherubim'." That should provide enough of a smokescreen to fool the casual observer.

"Understood, Commander. Shall I attempt to develop countermeasures for the Ishim?" A good idea to consider, but they had other priorities to focus on at the time.

"It's a low priority right now. You may attempt to create measures against them but only when things of a higher importance do not need to be dealt with." Akagi looked like she wanted to argue but held her tongue.

"Of course, Commander. Is there anything else?"

"No. Return to your work." She nodded and left the office to the two men. The silence remained for a while longer before the Sub-Commander broke it.

"This is certainly a departure from what was foreseen in the Dead Sea Scrolls, isn't it, Ikari?"



"The Dead Sea Scrolls should not be taken literally. Despite their accuracy, parts of them have been lost and faded beyond legibility with age. They should be seen as a guideline, nothing more."

"But will the Old Men see it that way? They have never been fond of… unforeseen variables."

"They will flounder about for a while, attempting to realign their Scenario, giving us time to cement ours while their attention is divided."

"And what of Kyoko's daughter? Wouldn't the Old Men target her due to her likeness to the Ishim?"

"I doubt the Old Men would be foolish enough to attack her merely based on the similarities in appearance. Even if they are, I have contingencies in place to prevent her from coming to harm until I can assuage their baseless concerns during our next meeting."

Fuyutsuki raised an eyebrow at that. "Ensuring another's safety? Who are you and what have you done with Ikari?"

"The Second Child is one of the few Evangelion pilots. She may not be fully necessary for the Scenario, but she is a useful tool in eliminating the Angels and I would be foolish if I did not use her skills to the fullest." Gendo pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. "Besides, Yui always liked Kyoko and her daughter. She would be irate if I did not at least make a token effort to protect them."

Fuyutsuki chuckled. "That I'll believe."

Notes:
Author's Note from Fanfiction.net | "Another chapter bites the dust, hope y'all enjoy. This one is a bit exposition-heavy, but I feel some setup for future events never hurt. Seriously though, what's up with the 1:1 Unit-01 decoy balloon? Its existence confuses me. Anyway, leave a review and all that jazz."

Part 2 is now a thing! "Blackunknown" released Chapter 11 a couple of days ago -- YATTA!

[jeffrey-dallas]

I've gone back and done some proofreading on the first three chapters (consistent tenses; run-on sentences; etc.). Odds are good that Chapter 4 will be released this evening or Monday.

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it. This is Part 1 which contains ten chapters, and hopefully Part 2 will be along soon.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-07-16
Words: 3,344

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?

Notes: (See the end of the work for notes.)


Chapter 4: Visions of Elevator Conversations

The next day was quite eventful for Shinji. For starters, he woke up from a good night's sleep to see Shiki sitting down at the edge of his futon. She was staring at him, unblinkingly, like she'd been there the entire night. Was this some way of getting back at him for whatever slight he committed against her yesterday? Leader had commandeered a pillow and dragged it to the corner of his room, proceeding to sleep upon it like a restless feline. Determining it was too early to question anything, he decided to drag himself to the kitchen and make breakfast for everyone. Taking stock of his available ingredients (half a dozen eggs, a slightly wilted bundle of scallions, a quarter jug of spoiled milk, some stale cheese, half a dozen different kinds of instant meals, and way too much beer), he decided that a simple breakfast of omelets with scallions would do. Also, he'd have to get more groceries if he wanted a variety of food besides instant meals.

Shiki followed in after him and began to help with the preparation. All he needed was the scallions cut while he mixed the eggs, so there wasn't much he needed help with. Not that that stopped her from brandishing a large kitchen knife and going to town on the scallions. Points for the enthusiasm, he noted internally. Soon enough Leader and Misato emerged from their rooms, engaging in an intense staredown before both rushed for the bathroom, intent on getting it first. Unfortunately for Leader, being larger meant Misato could cover more distance in a shorter amount of time, beating Leader to the bathroom in record time. Leader huffed in annoyance, now having to patiently wait her turn to use the bathroom. There was no way she was plotting revenge by replacing all Misato's beer with non-alcoholic variants. That would be petty and beneath her, which absolved her of any guilt should such a thing happen later.

Shortly after everyone was showered and fed, and morning beer drunk with an energizing shout, Misato proceeded to tease her new charge about bringing in two girls to his new bedroom, much to the three's embarrassment.

They all left soon after, and fortunately, Misato kept her promise of driving slower. Of course, to her, that meant normal levels of dangerous speed instead of action movie levels. Leader and Shiki wisely decided to hunker down in his shirt pocket from the get-go this time. It was honestly much better than yesterday's vehicular maelstrom of speed. Misato even stopped at red lights most of the time, causing one bicycle-riding police officer to stare at the Alpine Renault in fear, muttering something about 'the blue horseman of conquest' before fainting. All in all, everyone got out of Misato's car in far better condition than after yesterday's wild ride.

Of course, he didn't catch a break while at NERV, as there was a lot of work to do in order to get him squared away as a pilot. Getting an ID was easy enough; he merely had to get his picture taken and wait for it to get printed. However, the part that wasn't easy was when Leader hijacked the camera from the NERV employee and spent an hour trying to get the picture just how she wanted it. Also, Shiki wouldn't leave his shoulder while the picture was being taken, which was a bit awkward. Thankfully, they didn't try to interfere with his plugsuit measuring, mostly because it involved him needing to be without clothing. They quickly vacated once that was explained. After that was done (not without some light teasing from Misato), he got to the sync test. He put on his newly produced plugsuit (how NERV produced it so fast surprised him) and met with a new hurdle.

"Shinji-" Doctor Akagi started, annoyance edging into her voice. "We are already behind schedule, please have your guests wait outside the entry plug."

"Anta Baka," Leader hissed out to the Doctor, venom dripping from her voice like the fangs of a snake. This was the current issue - Leader and Shiki did not want him going into the entry plug without them. He wasn't sure why, but he got the feeling they were concerned about something. Perhaps they thought he would get hurt like when he fought the Angel, but this was a safe, controlled environment without danger. Besides, there's no way an Angel would be anywhere near the Geofront now, right?

------------------------------------------------------------------

Thousands of meters beneath Shinji's current location in the Geofront, Lilith the Second Angel twitched in annoyance. This gave Rei an irritating itch on the arm covered by a cast. This only increased her desire for vengeance.

------------------------------------------------------------------

"Look here you little ginger gremlins-" Doctor Akagi matched Leader's venom. "- I have had it up to here with your tomfoolery! I need to get a baseline psychograph and sync ratio for the Third Child and I will not have you causing sync interference by getting in there with him!"

Shinji, wanting to prevent the argument before it began, knelt to be closer to Leader and Shiki. "Leader, Shiki, I'll be fine," he began to assuage them. "It's just a routine test, right? I'll get this done quickly then we can head back home and I'll cook up something. Okay?" He'd found that promising food often prevented his Sensei from getting into arguments with the neighbors. Hopefully, it worked for others as well.

"Oh, gods. Misato, you haven't cooked anything for him, have you!? If I have to call a biohazard team because of your cooking poisoned somebody again, I will not be happy."

"Come on, Rits, it's only been five times!"

"The fact that you think five times is okay is concerning!"

Shinji began to tune them out (and made a mental note to never let Misato cook) as Leader and Shiki huddled and began to discuss something, occasionally looking back at him when they paused for a moment. Eventually, they broke their huddle and stared at him.

"Baka Shinji, Anta Baka," Leader intoned, giving him a thumbs-up gesture. Shiki didn't look happy, but she nodded all the same.

"Thanks. I'll be done soon."

"The test will take around two hours," Doctor Akagi added, with a tinge of malice in her voice towards the Minisukas.

He didn't respond to that; he didn't want to create a conflict when he just ended one. He sighed and got into the entry plug, Leader and Shiki watching him intently. He took his seat as LCL began to fill up the plug, the coppery taste of blood filling his lungs as the LCL suffused his very being once again.



The startup sequence engaged as the technicians began listing the activation processes as that booted up, Shinji once more felt the Evangelion activate as-

[{ravenouswhitevulturescirclingoverheaddisplayingtheravagedcarcassofadeadgodthechoker'sfinalactivationcommencesdetonatingtheheadoftheonlypersonyoumayhaveeverloved}]

Shinji's eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets as he nearly bit through his tongue trying to stifle the deafening scream building in his diaphragm. He forced down the rising tide of bile threatening to reintroduce his breakfast to the world.

"-borderline reached, let's take a look at…. SHINJI!" Doctor Akagi shouted, though it was nearly deafened by the sound of his rapidly beating heart. "Your heart rate has spiked to dangerous levels and your psychograph isn't much better! What happened?!" she demanded, though her voice was tinged with an undercurrent of genuine concern.

"T-t-the Angel," he lied without thinking, already the memories of the grotesque visions [{thesoulrendingscreamofdespairasthelookonhisfaceforeveretchedinyourmind}] of whatever that was are fading, leaving nothing behind save for the feeling they left him. Despair, anguish, regret. "I-I-it felt like it was crashing against my skull again, like when I fought it."

There was silence for a moment before Doctor Akagi spoke again. "Dammit, the biosynapses connected to the damaged cranial plating weren't fully disconnected due to the damage caused by the Angel, leading to a psychosomatic feedback reaction." He doubted he would've understood that even if his brain was not preoccupied with [{thewhitevulture'smaliciousgrinsunit-08engagingmark.09}] the fading visions. "I've forcibly disconnected the afflicted area; how do you feel?"

"I…." The last of the visions faded into nothingness, leaving behind a bitter aftertaste. "I feel sick." He paused, feeling something odd, something he couldn't place. The headache then came, filling him with a new pain. "And I have a headache."

Doctor Akagi snorted. "I can imagine you do. Try to relax for a bit; we'll get the readings when you've calmed down. We'll also get some ibuprofen ready for you when we're done with the test."

"Thanks, Doctor Akagi." The noise of the technicians faded away as his mind wandered. He hoped Leader and Shiki weren't too worried; he wouldn't want to trouble them after he said he'd be alright. He'd have to put in a bit of extra effort in his cooking tonight for worrying them.

The rest of the sync test went without issue, aside from an irate Leader and Shiki kicking his shins repeatedly for worrying them. A quick shower to clean off the errant LCL and some promised ibuprofen later, they were off to head back home. Well, after a quick tour of the city as promised by Misato, but if a 'quick' car ride with Misato was the worst thing to happen to him today, then he'd be fine. Nothing, barring an Angel attack, would make this day worse.

Shinji immediately learned the follies of tempting fate when the elevator that would take them to the garage opened to reveal his father. Time appeared to stop - Shinji staring wide-eyed at his father, his father staring impassively, almost disdainfully, at him. Shinji swallowed the lump in his throat, whispered "I mustn't run away" to himself, and boarded the elevator. Misato blinked and quickly joined him before the elevator could close. Leader and Shiki were tense on his shoulders, glaring at his father. His father remained a silent stone pillar of stoicism, uncaring of the atmosphere in the elevator. His body language screamed out 'There is no situation I cannot handle'.

------------------------------------------------------------------


(Parody art by Barrett Biggers)

Gendo Ikari could not handle this situation. He hoped his impassive yet disdainful stare would dissuade his son from joining him on the elevator. But his predictions based on years of secret observations of his son's behavior were shattered in a moment, forcing him to pick up the pieces and rebuild. A side glance confirmed that, yes, the Cherubim attached to his son were making threatening gestures at him while glaring at him with the heat to rival the surface of the sun. The eyepatched one was cracking her knuckles with malicious intent, the other brandished her mini-Lance of Longinus in a way that was always pointed towards him. He needed to salvage the situation, and ensure his son was on the right part for his part in the Scenario.

"Shinji," he began, surprising the other occupants. "Are you getting settled in?" A good icebreaker, seeing if his living arrangements were sufficient.

"Y-yes, father."

The silence continued after that. Gendo remembered that his son was shy and introverted. He would need to continue pressing.

"I see you have obtained companionship with the miniature variants of the Second Child; please ensure they do not get into too much trouble." There, some small chastisement would grease the wheels. Hopefully, his son would recognize the opening for a parlay he was just given.

"Y-yes, father." His son seemed to shrink back, defeated. The Cherubim glared harder at him.

Dammit! How did Yui make parenting look so easy?! One of her many virtues. He needed something to get his son to communicate. What did parents usually talk to boys his age about?

"So. How is…." School? No, he hasn't gotten back to school yet. Friends? No, his son had no friends. Girlfriend? No, he absolutely didn't have a girlfriend. The Ishim? No, he just reprimanded him about them. Dammit, he already started asking. He needed to finish with something, anything! "…. Puberty?" Gendo you absolute fucking idiot, anything but that! The silence that enveloped the elevator was deafening, the errant breaths of its occupants sounding like gunshots comparatively. Every other occupant in the elevator stared at Gendo like he had grown two extra heads. The ding of the elevator reaching the garage floor brought relief to everyone, his son nearly sprinting out of the elevator with Captain Katsuragi following close behind.

The doors closed once more, taking him upwards. There he and Fuyutsuki would be meeting with a cult of powerful old men that held control of the world in their hands and used that power towards reaching their own personal godhood via Complementation of the human race. He would duel them with half-truths and double meanings to hijack their plan so he could reunite with his wife.

Why was that easier than talking to his son?

------------------------------------------------------------------


(Gendo & SEELE cosplay: r/anime)

Barely illuminated by faint light, Gendo Ikari was surrounded by the twelve imposing monoliths that each represented a member of SEELE. Each man here had the power and sway to effectively control a country, direct the United Nations for their own goals, and, together, lead the whole of humanity to ruin. They were locked in a silent stalemate, waiting for someone to shatter the silence that had fallen.

"Ikari, what the legitimate fuck is going on?" SEELE-7 broke the silence with the force of a sledgehammer smashing through a window. And with that, the gate opened along with a torrent of questions and accusations. Gendo remained silent, waiting for the deluge of drivel to end. Fortunately, he did not have to wait long.

"SILENCE!" Keel Lorenz, SEELE-1, shouted, immediately bringing about order to the meeting. "Ikari, if you would please begin your report?"

"Certainly. As I figure most of you have already read the report, I will cut out the needless details and go over the main focus of the incident. Around forty hours prior, Eva Unit-01 did battle with the Third Angel as the Dead Sea Scrolls predicted. However, in the midst of the battle, a large army of small entities bearing a likeness to the Second Child wielding tiny replicas of the Lance of Longinus emerged to decimate the Third Angel. The army then dispersed." He paused to let them digest this information. "Those are the major details of the report - any questions?" The fact that the first appearance of these entities happened in the Unit-01 entry plug was left out, of course. No need for the test type to come under unwarranted suspicion, after all.

"I see," Lorenz was the first to speak up, meaning the others would hold their tongues for now. "What can you tell us about these…." Lorenz paused, unsure of what to call the Second Child lookalikes.

"I have dubbed them Ishim in the reports I am currently compiling," Gendo provided. He would offer them this puzzle piece, hoping it would prevent them from spotting others in his reports. They did not need to know about the Cherubim, for now at least.

"The Ishim? Yes, good. What can you tell us about them?"

"Little as of now. They appear to only communicate in pantomimes and calling people idiots, leaving little in the way of obtaining information via normal methods. They are also responsible for many acts of minor anarchy."

"Any lasting damage?" SEELE-6 inquired.

"Nothing major, just a need for a minor increase in our office supply and cleaning budgets. The request for those will be addressed later."

"Their Lances, can they be used for the Scenario?" SEELE-11 derailed the budgetary talks at the get-go, smart bastard.

"We have yet to obtain a sample, but passive data suggests a high but imperfect match to ours. I would personally not take the chance to try to use one of the Ishim's lances."

"Noted," Lorenz stated. "But I feel the most important question is, can they be controlled? Should we even bother sending the Second Child from Germany?" That was the real meat of the matter. It all boiled down to 'Are they a threat to the Scenario?'

"It is my opinion that while we do not have any known way to control them yet-" That you know of, at least. "-they can be used effectively even if we cannot fully control them. The Ishim may provide a way to simplify and expedite killing the Angels." He paused yet again to allow them to contemplate his reasoning. "As for bringing the Second Child here, I believe having a slightly ineffective tool that we know how to control is better than having to rely on an unpredictable tool we do not know we can control. Wouldn't you agree?" The monoliths were silent after that, no doubt having a private conference to discuss their next action.

"You make a decent point, Ikari," SEELE-3 begrudgingly admitted.

SEELE-9 seemed to have his own take, however. "Still, perhaps we should just eliminate the Second Child. Having the Fourth Child to pilot Unit-02 would be better than dealing with-"

"ENOUGH!" Lorenz bellowed, quashing SEELE-9's suggestion immediately. "Having the Marduk Institution unveil the Fourth Child so soon after the Third would bring too much attention. Ikari, we have much to deliberate on regarding the Ishim and their place in the Scenario. Keep us apprised of their actions and be prepared to cull them if required. The Second Child will arrive on schedule. Is there anything else?"

"No, good day, gentlemen." The monoliths flickered out of existence, leaving Gendo and Fuyutsuki alone once more.

"Well Ikari, seems like we've avoided the worst. Hopefully, they see fit to keep us around despite our job being taken over by an army of tiny pubescent redheads."

"We'll be fine, Professor; we just need to play our cards right." He paused. "Still, I get the feeling that I'm missing a piece of this new puzzle the Ishim have brought to our doorstep. A piece I should be aware of but am not."

"Are you sure the feeling isn't a backlash from letting your amazing parental conversational skills out of their cages?"

His head whipped to Fuyutsuki at lightning speeds. "How do you know?"

"You realize the elevators have cameras, right? And as Sub-Commander, I have security access to most cameras in the Geofront."

"Delete it, now."

"No, I'm saving it for when Yui returns. I'm sure she'll get a kick out of it." Fuyutsuki knew he would get hell for this, but he didn't care. The opportunity was too good, so he would accept the punishment. It was worth it.

------------------------------------------------------------------



They all stood on the overlook, still silent from the awkward situation they had escaped from. Unfortunately, somebody had to break the silence, so Shinji decided to bite the bullet.

"So, Misato, why are we-"

"Shhhh, give it a minute." She pointed out at the city….

Just in time to see the buildings rise from underneath the ground, the evening sun illuminating them with a brilliant orange glow. Shinji, Leader, and Shiki could only stare in awe at the wondrous sight before them.

"That-" she began, "is the city you three saved. Take pride in it because they'll be teaching it… in…. the…." She trailed off, her face brightening with remembrance. "Oh right! That was the fourth thing! Shinji, you're starting school tomorrow!"

"What!?" His head whipped around, nearly throwing Leader and Shiki from his shoulders.

"Don't worry, you'll do great! Make some friends, maybe even get a girlfriend~ Then you can tell your dad how your puberty is going~"

"MISATO!" His scream was met with Misato's laughter, Shiki's groan, and Leader's snickering.


Notes:
Author's Note from Fanfiction.net | “Had a bit of fun writing this one so I hope you have fun with the strange visions, awkward elevator rides, and meetings with old men. Wonder what's the deal with those visions? It's probably nothing important. Also, I've noticed I've been skimping on the Minisukas in my Minisukas fic; the next chapter should rectify that. Hopefully. As always, leave a review if you want, and have a great day.”

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it. This is Part 1 which contains ten chapters, and hopefully Part 2 will be along soon.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-08-01
Words: 3,811

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?

Notes: (See the end of the work for notes.)


Chapter 5: School of Mild Knocks

The train's vibrations filled him with a sense of ease, of normalcy. This was, however, countered by the multitude of stares he was receiving caused by his curious companions. Prior to that, Shinji's morning was relatively normal - he woke up to Shiki staring at him unblinking like a tiny red-headed gargoyle, he walked into the kitchen to find Pen-Pen warking on the phone with a stock broker regarding the increase in South American fruit prices affecting the relevant sector (also something about haircuts? He wasn't sure, he couldn't understand Pen-Pen's half of the conversation), and Leader losing another race for the bathroom to Misato. His sudden start at Tokyo-3 First Municipal Junior High School was jarring, but nothing he couldn't handle by using his years of practice fading into the background so nobody would notice him. So he prepared an extra-large bento to share with Leader and Shiki using some newly acquired fresh ingredients.

Politely denying Misato's offer for a ride to school on the basis of wanting to get a better lay of the land, he quickly walked to the train. The car he got in wasn't too crowded, mostly containing other students and a few errant businessmen. He quickly grabbed a seat and tried to make himself invisible despite the two Minisukas on his shoulders - a challenge, but not undoable. His long practiced social invisibility techniques, however, were never meant to account for a horde of Minisukas bursting into the train car before it left and surrounding him, drawing the attention of everyone to him and him alone.

"Baka!" "Anta Baka?" "Baka Shinji." The cacophonous half-shouts of the new horde of Minisukas conveyed nothing to him about what was going on. He wondered if he caused some kind of territorial dispute by entering the train as Leader was threatening the horde with her lance, acting as a mighty lioness protecting her cub from a pack of hyenas. Angry red-headed hyenas. Shiki, to her credit, ignored the whole thing and climbed into his front pocket and proceeded to use it as a hammock, drifting off into a light nap.

"Woah, how'd you tame them?!" A new voice broke his attention away from the horde, revealing a bespectacled teenage boy with sandy blond hair. "Cause the only other person I've seen the Red Demons interact with cordially is the Class Rep, and she won't tell me anything!" All the Minisukas, even Shiki, turned to look at the boy with varying levels of annoyance. Except for Shiki - she just stared at him, blinked, then went back to ignoring everyone in favor of napping.

"Uhhh…."

"Oh right, I'm Kensuke Aida, nice to meetcha!" The newly identified Kensuke began appraising Shinji with an analytical eye. "Haven't seen you around before. Did you just transfer in?"

"Y-yes, I'm Shinji Ikari. Nice to meet you, Aida." Shinji bowed lightly, in order to not disturb Shiki like last time.

"Ikari, huh?" Kensuke muttered aloud. The Minisukas had since gone back to their territorial dispute, though a few kept a wary eye on Kensuke - in particular, the camera dangling from his neck. Why he had a camera, Shinji didn't know. Perhaps he was part of the photography club? "Well Ikari, let me be the first to welcome you to Tokyo-3."

"Oh, thank you." Well, he seemed nice at least. At least there was one person who-

"So, are you piloting the giant robot?"

Shinji's train of thought came to a screeching halt, possibly even derailing and destroying multiple metaphorical mental buildings.

"Giant robot?" The genuine confusion in his voice from the sudden change in topic prompted Kensuke to keep going.

"Yeah, the one that fought the monster a few days ago. I thought it was pretty weird that we received a transfer student so suddenly after a giant monster attack, and he shares the family name of NERV's Supreme Commander, so-" He was interrupted when something flew past his cheek, leaving a small but noticeable scratch on it. He turned to look at the red lance now embedded in the train car's roof, then back at all the Minisukas, who were now all staring at him. The threatening look they were giving him was decipherable by anyone with at least three brain cells to mean 'You better stop if you know what's good for you.' Fortunately, Kensuke Aida had three brain cells, and plenty more to spare, so he got the hint. "-so how about the local sports team, huh? They sure are doing things in the current sports season." He flinched when the lance flew past him again, back into Leader's hand.

"They, uh, sure are, Aida," Shinji tried, hoping to give his nosy schoolmate a way out.

"Yup, so I'm going to go sit away from any theoretical threat to my life. See you in school, Ikari!" Kensuke bolted away to the other side of the car before Shinji could get a word in edgewise. The Minisukas seemed to have brokered some kind of truce as they stopped circling him like some kind of [{whitevulture}] predator, instead opting to hang around his general area, glaring at anyone who vaguely approached.

"I'm really going to need to improve my social invisibility techniques, aren't I?" he muttered to himself.

"Anta Baka?" Shiki provided, making Shinji sigh. It was going to be a long day.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kensuke sprinted out of the train car like his life depended on it (which it might have) as the horde of Minisukas dispersed. Shinji then noticed something he hadn't during the drives with Misato. The city was infested with Minisukas. It wasn't like it was too obvious, but if you paid attention you could probably find a Minisuka doing something in a little alcove or on a roof as you walked around. On the way to school, Shinji noticed around two dozen Minisukas doing various things like drifting jury-rigged RC cars, using stray cats as steeds, fighting seagulls, or trying to explain the difference between pink and salmon to a preschooler via pantomime. And they were all watching him. He could feel their eyes as he walked past, studying him. It was uncomfortable having so many eyes on him.

Eventually, he was able to make it to school, attempting to blend in with a crowd of students making their way through the front gates. The teacher in charge of watching the front gate stared at him for a moment before breaking his stare and scratching his forehead while muttering something into his wrist. After a quick stop at the faculty office to receive his papers and a school computer terminal, he was directed to class 2-A for his introduction. After writing his name on the blackboard and giving himself a modest introduction, he noticed a few things. First, the boy he met on the train, Kensuke Aida, was his classmate and tried very hard not to look at him. Second, there were three Minisukas (who were clapping politely) on the desk of a brown-haired girl with twin tails, the 'class rep' if Aida was to be believed. Third and finally, everyone was looking at him with awe, whispering beyond the edge of his hearing about something.

"Thank you, Mister Ikari," droned the teacher. "Please take that seat over there." A weary finger pointed to an empty seat in the center of the classroom. He silently made his way to the seat, withstanding everyone's stares and the Minisukas continued polite clapping. Shinji tried to fade into the background as the teacher began his lesson, which devolved into a lecture about Second Impact. His terminal booted up without much fanfare, which prompted Leader and Shiki to start messing with it. They did... something computery on it, something that went beyond his barely computer literate head. Before he had time to question it, a message notification appeared, causing Leader and Shiki to stop whatever they were doing.

: hey ikari? its aida

Oh, these have chat functions? Aren't they worried the students will be distracted by these if everyone gets a terminal? Thoughts for later; he better respond. He wouldn't want to be rude.

: Greetings Aida, it is a pleasure to talk to you again. I hope we did not get off on the wrong foot on the train.

: wow ikari i dont think ive seen some1 b more formal in a school chat room outside of the class rep

Was that a compliment or an insult?

: anyway just a heads up i may have let slip that u may b the giant robots pilot 2 the entire class by accident please dont sic ur demon army on me pls+thnks

Aida left the chat room quickly and left Shinji with many questions, like - why was Aida using this weird language that seemed to abbreviate some words, how does one accidentally reveal the potential identity of a giant robot pilot, and oh gods why were all these chat requests popping up? The tidal wave of chat prompts flowed forth, most asking him if he was a pilot. Also, a bunch of boys (and one girl) asked him if he could get Doctor Akagi's number for them. He tried closing them, but for every prompt he closed, three more took their place like some kind of digital hydra. As it seemed all hope was lost, the deluge of prompts ceased and was replaced by one message.

: Hello there Ikari, I'm the class representative Hikari Horaki. As a class representative, I possess minor administrative privileges over chat functionality, as such I have disabled incoming messages for you so as not to bother you.

Oh, that's a lifesaver. And explains how students don't get too distracted.

: Thank you very much Miss Horaki. I am sorry to have caused trouble on my first day, and I am thankful for your assistance.

: You're welcome Ikari, and there is no need to apologize, it's not your fault Aida decided to spread rumors about you. In any case, I feel there are a few things we should discuss regarding school and other matters when we break for lunch. I will talk to you then, in the meantime be sure to pay attention.

The chat window closed, but it did nothing to dispel the stares he was receiving from his classmates. Leader and Shiki were staring at Aida, who was sweating bullets and trying to pay attention to the teacher, who was…

"…Second Impact then brought about a consistent increase in the temperature, making a massive variety of crops untenable in Japan's current environment….." Wasn't this supposed to be a math class? Well, no better time to practice being invisible, hopefully like a possum playing [{torntopieceslikeapotter'svessel}] dead they would ignore him eventually. Until then, he had research to do. Misato offhandedly mentioned yesterday that the Second Child was from Germany, perhaps that meant Leader and Shiki would like German food. He hoped they did. He wanted to thank them for the help they gave him with the Angel, and what better way than food?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rei Ayanami was stuck in a hospital bed, healing from her injuries. She had no problem with that, it gave her time to think, time to plot vengeance. A normal person would question why an inexplicable need to acquire vengeance cut through dull and dead emotions like a burning knife through cold butter, but she was not a normal person. She was the First Child, pilot of Unit-00, the container for the soul of Lilith, and a lifetime subscriber to Vegetarian's Tri-Monthly magazine. She didn't need to know where the need for vengeance came from, only that she obtained it.

"Anta Baka?" She was broken out of her revenge-based musings by a familiar, irritating query. A tiny Ishim (the Commander informed her of the new designation when he visited her earlier that morning) was staring at her from the floor beside her bed. She wondered the best way to commit impromptu vengeance on her returned nemesis before she realized this one felt….. different. A flash of something momentarily broke her out of her vengeance-tainted thoughts….

[{adespairingscreamthatsignaledtheendofallthings}]

…..a vision that faded like her memories of the time before dashed through her mind, lessening the desire for vengeance.

"You are not the one who committed the indiscretion known as a 'prank' against me, are you?" The Ishim blinked, opening and closing her mouth like a fish. A very red-headed fish. Rei realized she had a sudden dislike for the color red that she did not possess previously, like her desire for vengeance. Unlike her desire for vengeance, she deigned to question where such a dislike came from. A moment of consideration brought an answer - she hated blood, blood was red, ergo she hated red. Nodding at her infallible logic as to where her new hate came from, she returned her attention to the Ishim, who shook her head in the negative. Good, that would make this easier.

"Very well. I have no ill will towards you. But to the one who transgressed against me, you will relay a message." Rei did not wait for a confirmation before continuing. "Tell the one who transgressed against me that I, Rei Ayanami, will not take this act of disrespect lying down. I will enact upon them a vengeance so grand, so sublime, that future generations of mankind will write epics about my victory. Plays will be written about my conquest over your compatriot, sonnets depicting my revenge will be distributed to schoolchildren to teach them of the folly of men perpetrated by the one who wronged me. And when my dread vengeance is brought to fruition, when this Prankster who had defaced me lies broken and defeated at my feet, I will say nothing. As nothing needs to be said to mere dust..." Rei paused to take a drink of water, her vocal cords were quite out of practice for such lengthy use. "Could you tell her that, please?" She almost forgot to add please, she was always instructed to be polite when possible.

The Ishim stared at her, slacked-jawed and pale. Rei hoped she wasn't sick, she would like her promise of vengeance to be delivered. The Ishim regained color and nodded stiffly before running out of the room. She must want to deliver the message as soon as possible, how helpful. Rei realized the pinching feeling of vengeance had also lessened, decreasing the need to think about vengeance. Odd, she would have to investigate this later. But before that, she felt the tendrils of sleep creep upon her mind. She required rest, any thoughts of vengeance could wait until when she woke up. As she drifted to sleep, her thoughts, oddly enough, drifted to a certain brown-haired boy she had met a few days prior, filling her with curiosity about the Third Child.

"I wonder what the Commander's son is like?"



--------------------------------------------------------------------------

The lunch bell rang and the dogs of war were let slip. Students circled around Shinji like sharks smelling blood. They pelted him with a caterwaul of questions, leaving no time for him to answer. Before Leader and Shiki could scare them away with what was undoubtedly a violent act of intimidation, an authoritative voice cut through the voices.

"Ikari, welcome to our class. I am the class representative, Hikari Horaki. I need to go over a few things with you. Would you care to join me for lunch while I explain things?" Her mere presence inspired fear into the student body. As they shrunk away as she approached him, mutters of 'the twin tail tyrant' were whispered just out of earshot. Shinji grabbed the offer like a drowning man to a piece of driftwood.

"Y-yes, of course, Class Representative Horaki. Sorry to trouble you." He idly noticed the three Minisukas from before sitting atop the Class Rep's head and shoulders, glaring at the other students.


(Hikari Horaki cosplay by Kamelya-chan)

"It's no trouble at all, it's my duty as Class Representative to help new students." Her eyes turned to a student trying to quietly flee the classroom. "Aida!" she called out to Kensuke with a smile that did not reach her eyes. "Help me go over things with Ikari, please." It was not a request. Kensuke's eyes flew back and forth between the Class Rep and the door, trying to decide if he preferred being consigned to oblivion now or later. Kensuke, to his credit, decided to face the gallows without delay.

"Yes, Class Rep." He moved to follow the Class Rep with Shinji as she led them to a more secluded area away from prying eyes, which ended up being a nice shaded bench out in the courtyard. Shinji began to unwrap his lunch and distribute some of it to Leader and Shiki.


(Shinji Ikari cosplay by Iko; Kensuke Aida cosplay by Momoca)

"So first off-" Hikari began. "Aida, apologize to Ikari for spreading rumors about him!" she ordered as she also began doling out parts of her bento to her own retinue of Minisukas. None save Leader seemed to notice Shiki holding an octopus-shaped sausage that Shinji had given her with a shell-shocked stare. This was quickly solved by a light smack on the back of Shiki's head, courtesy of Leader.

"Uh, sorry, Ikari. In my defense though, I didn't outright say you were a pilot." Kensuke silently lamented his own lack of lunch, but thought of the cafeteria food and realized he was probably better off.

"What do you mean, Aida?"

"Well, someone asked how I got this scratch." He pointed to the scratch on his cheek. "So I said a Red Demon gave it to me when I asked a new kid if he was the pilot of the giant robot. People began making their own assumptions. It…. snowballed from there." Oh, that wasn't as bad as he thought. It didn't help that he was the pilot, but hopefully, Shinji could play dumb until they got bored.

"That sounds like it was just an accident, Aida, so you don't have to worry. Everyone will get bored eventually and leave me alone. It's not like I'm very interesting to be around anyway."

"Geez, Ikari, that's kinda-"

"Anyway!" Hikari interjected before this depressing topic could continue any further. "There was something I wanted to ask you, Ikari. How do you deal with them?"

Shinji blinked at the sudden change in topic. "Them?" he questioned. He looked around, spotting the two groups of Minisukas eating. He quickly put two and two together. "Oh, the Minisukas."

"Wait, what did you call th-" Kensuke's question was cut off by Hikari's confirmation.

"Yes, them. I know they mean well-" Kensuke barely suppressed a snort. "-but they're so exhausting to deal with! I already have to deal with my sisters, my dad, and being a class representative! And I don't want to kick them out, that would be rude! Besides, my little sister loves them."

"Are they good with kids?"

"I didn't say that." She coughs awkwardly. "Anyway, you obviously have your own to deal with. How do you handle them?" Shinji was taken aback by the Class Rep's mild but firm mannerisms breaking, leaving a tone of exhaustion.

"Uh, sorry, but I don't really do anything in particular. I just go about my day with them there. They haven't really bothered me much in any way." Well, aside from Shiki staring at him while he sleeps, but that might be misinterpreted, so he wasn't going to say that.

"Oh." Hikari seemed to deflate at that. Silence reigned for a time, peppered by the sounds of eating before she spoke again, this time to Aida. "By the way, Aida, where is Suzuhara? I haven't seen him for a few days."

"You haven't heard, Class Rep? His sister got injured when the giant robot was fighting that monster. He's been staying at the hospital while his sister is in the I…..C…..U. Hey, Ikari? You alright?" Kensuke could only stare at Shinji, who had gone wide-eyed and pale.

"Baka-Shinji?" Leader, or perhaps Shiki, called out to him, but they were fading from his perception as the weight of his actions was crashing down upon him. He stumbled off the bench, his lunchbox clattering to the ground along with its contents. He didn't care, though, as he half-sprinted to the nearest location he could see, a lone tree, and expelled the contents of his stomach at the base of the trunk. He tried to get his erratic breathing under control as muffled voices approached him from behind as he tried to stabilize his guilty thoughts.

"It's….. my fault?" Shinji gasped out through the taste of bile as two pairs of tiny hands proceeded to pat his back, making him feel a bit better. Thankful for Leader's and Shiki's support, he couldn't help but feel undeserving of it. Quite frankly, his first day of school was ending up terribly and he hoped the day wouldn't get worse.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

NERV Berlin at the same time

[{lettingoutananguishedscreamasyoucradledthebodyinyourarms}]

Asuka Langley Soryu woke with a start. She got up out of her tangled bed covers and stared at her reflection in her vanity's mirror.

"What the hell was that!?"


Notes:
Author's Note from Fanfiction.net | “Another chapter bites the dust. Ending feels a bit weak for this one, hopefully, it looks better than I think it does. Next time we'll be taking a quick look at the Macrosuka herself, Asuka Langley Soryu, and her time in Germany. Until then, leave a review if you want, and have a pleasant day.”

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it. This is Part 1 which contains ten chapters, and hopefully Part 2 will be along soon.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-08-01
Words: 3,318

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?

Notes: (See the end of the work for notes.)


Chapter 6: A Crowbar a Day Keeps the Biohazard Away

Asuka Langley Soryu gazed at her clock, noticing it was way too early o'clock, and sighed. "So much for beauty sleep," she noted to herself. Though it's not like she needed beauty sleep - she looked damn good no matter how much sleep she got. Not that it seemed to affect Kaji in any way. He was way too good at resisting her womanly charms, dammit! Her mind, recognizing that the mental tangent was going a bit too far down the Kaji Rabbit Hole, decided to switch gears back to her recent nightmare. "That wasn't one of the normal nightmares," she mumbled drearily. The fact that she had to specify that she had 'normal' nightmares was bad enough, now she was having 'odd' nightmares. And she could barely remember it now that she woke up! She could recall there was a boy, but her tired brain drank too deeply from the Kaji Kool-Aid when she woke up, and now she could only imagine Kaji's face on the boy's body.

"Stupid sexy Kaji. Damn his rugged good looks, making me misremember important nightmare details." On the bright side, she preferred having nightmares she couldn't remember, instead of nightmares involving hospitals and Mama and her cheating bastard of a father and-

She paused and took a deep breath before that mental tangent went into 'bludgeon her father with a crowbar' territory. Why a crowbar? Because she got a crowbar with a custom Unit-02 decal and she was damn well going to use it! Before she could delve deeper into why one shouldn't order custom crowbars at one in the morning, Asuka decided that she needed some coffee to wake up her brain so as to prevent more mental tangents.

"Alright, I'm not going back to sleep, so I should probably get some coffee, right?" she asked her reflection in her vanity's mirror, and the Asuka in the mirror nodded her head. Good, glad she agreed with her. Asuka got up, heading out to fuel herself with that glorious black ambrosia before her certified college-level intellect began to shake the dust off, and she had to stop in the doorway because something about what just happened didn't quite add up. Was it the nightmares? No, those were, regrettably, normal. Well, aside from the not-normal one she just had but that wasn't the problem. Was it the Kaji thoughts? No, thinking about Kaji was normal. It wasn't about her father, either - she always wanted to punch his smug face. What was it? Wait. Were mirrors supposed to nod back independent of her own actions?

Asuka stood there for a solid twenty seconds while her brain churned out an answer of 'No, they don't.' She rushed back to the mirror, grabbing both of its sides as she stared deeply at her reflection, daring it to do something unusual. The reflection, much to her joy and regret, just mirrored her actions. She breathed a sigh of relief. "I'm just seeing things because I'm tired. I need to get that coffee ASAP," she grumbled unintelligibly as she walked away, resuming her journey for the dark ambrosia.

She did not notice that her reflection did not leave with her. It stayed in place and watched her walk off. Her reflection's face twisted into a smirk as it soundlessly chuckled before it dissipated into nothingness.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Asuka nearly inhaled the coffee as soon as it was cool enough, thanking whatever deities that would listen for coffee. The mental cobwebs were being shaken off by the intake of caffeine, resetting her brain's functions to normal. She took a moment to cast her mind back…. nope, still can't remember anything about the new nightmare. Well, she'll label it as 'not a big problem' for now. Hell, if it takes the place of her normal nightmares she'd refile it under 'kinda beneficial'. Her musings were cut off as she heard the apartment's front door open. Her mind immediately began contemplating if it was an intruder, her eyes darting over to the closet where she kept her crowbar. Before her mind could cement the idea of breaking in her crowbar, the rational part of her mind reminded her that NERV Berlin was one of the safest locations in the world, and she was its most valuable asset as the best Evangelion Pilot. Therefore, there would be no intruder. It was someone who was supposed to be here, and there was only one person who was allowed in her apartment without needing to worry about getting inflicted with blunt force trauma.

"Kaji!~" she called out in a sing-song voice. The visage of the unshaven emerged from the entryway, mild surprise etched onto his face along with a roguish grin.

"Oh, hey kiddo. Didn't realize you were awake. What're you doing up so early?" Asuka's eye twitched at being called 'kiddo', but she let it slide. He would see her womanly charms eventually!

"Oh, I just woke up a bit early, that's all." She didn't want him to know about the nightmares; men hated women who showed weakness. That's what Mama did, showed weakness. That's why her waste of oxygen father left Mama and shacked up with Mama's doctor, that no good- Push down the bad thoughts, Asuka - drink the coffee, and return attention to Kaji. "So, whatcha here for?~ What some coffee?~"

"I would actually love some coffee, thanks, kiddo." Another eye twitch. "Just make it to go. I gotta get back to work. I'm just here to drop your mail off." Asuka gave a little pout, hoping it would convince Kaji to stay. She still started pouring some coffee in a paper cup; she didn't have any clean cups left, anyway. "Don't be like that. I'm trying to help smooth along Unit-02's transfer. Wouldn't want to stay out of the fight too long, would you?" Gottdammit, he's right. The Third Child already had a leg up on her because some politician thought it'd be better to keep the Evangelion here as long as possible instead of sending it to the frontlines beforehand so we don't die to alien monsters. And it would still take months to actually depart! "Don't worry, I have come bearing a gift to tide you over."

"Gift?!" Her mind lit up, wondering what he could possibly have gotten he- it's a folder. She took the folder from him with a flat look on her face, inspecting it. Her face immediately lit up again when the words 'Third Angel After Action Report' were visible to her eyes. She opened it up, ready to tear into the report and point out the faults of the rookie Third Child, only for her face to scrunch in annoyance when most of it was redacted. "What the hell?! Why is it redacted!? The most it says about the battle is that the Angel died due to 'environmental assistance'. What does that even mean?!"

"Maybe it means the Third Child uprooted a skyscraper and beat the Angel to death with it?" That actually sounded kinda creative. If the Third Child did that, she'd have to begrudgingly give him points for ingenuity. "Your guess is as mine. Apparently, there's a big information blackout due to Operational Security. Even the Third Child's picture is unavailable to get."

That got her attention. "OpSec? Is there some kind of outside force threatening the pilots?"

Kaji shrugged as he drank his coffee. "Could be, would explain why they're hushing up everything. Lot's of crazies in our world nowadays. Still, I'll see if I can get something. It would do well if our best pilot here was as well informed as possible before she gets to Tokyo-2, right?"

Asuka nodded in agreement, but something about that last part struck her as odd. "You mean Tokyo-3, right? That's where NERV is located."

For the first time in a while, Kaji's ever-present smirk morphed into a thoughtful expression, revealing the dark bags under his eyes. Then, a look of surprise overcame his face. "Oh shit," he muttered, then he bolted out of the apartment, leaving behind Asuka's mail and the smell of cheap aftershave, which was odd because Kaji never shaved.


(Ryoji Kaji cosplay by Waon Hirasawa)

Asuka sighed, then turned to her mail. "Junk, junk, junk, shampoo catalog, cult brochure, an advertisement for a steakhouse, a letter from my fat-" She paused, eyeing the letter from her father with enough heat to rival a star. She tore it open, and surprise, it was an invitation to brunch with one of his business partners that just so happened to have a son that would love to get to know her. Bah, she wished she had a fireplace so she could burn this waste of paper. Her next letter, however, caught her interest. Something with postage saying it was shipped overnight from Tokyo-3. She opened it and read the message, wondering if this was relevant to her upcoming journey.

"Congratulations!" it started in German. "'As the honorable Second Children, you have been granted access to a NERV limited edition eating fork.' Children, eating fork? Ugh, this is why you pay your translators and proofreaders." She fished around in the packaging to see if they actually remembered to include her gift. She was pleasantly surprised when she pulled out a two-pronged red fork with a spiral handle. "Well, it's red at least, so they have good taste." She inspected it for a moment before she placed it on her kitchen counter. She would need to remember to bring it with her when she went to Japan, but that was still some time off. Until then, she decided to see if there were any good movies on at whatever time it was.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Shinji Ikari's day, much to his joy, did not get worse. Aside from not getting to eat his now ruined lunch, the incessant queries of his pilot status, and the teacher's ramblings about Second Impact, his day was fairly fine. Though he dreaded the day he would have to face whoever this Suzuhara was, he had time to mentally (and potentially physically) prepare himself for that meeting. Until then, he needed to focus on other things so he didn't think about the young girl whose life he probably ruined. Oh gods he's doing it right now.

"Leader, Shiki. What do you think we should do for dinner?" He hoped the guilt and desperation didn't leak out into his voice, thankful the way back home was devoid of foot traffic at this time. Shiki just shrugged, which didn't help distract him from the bad thoughts. Leader, however, seemed very adamant about what she wanted - the problem was that Shinji had to guess what she was pantomiming at him. She started by making stirring motions. "A soup?" She nodded at him, confirming his guess. What type of soup, though? There were a few he saw when searching up recipes. She made a motion where she was holding something and throwing it upwards. "A….. pancake?" She gave him a thumbs up.

Pancake soup? That was… wait, he remembered seeing something like that when he was searching up German recipes. "A F-Flädlesuppe, right?"

Leader stared at him incredulously for a moment before she burst out laughing. Even Shiki started chuckling, though she at least tried to stifle it. "W-what?! Did I say something wrong?" Leader shook her head in between fits of laughter, giving him a shaky thumbs up to confirm that's what she wanted.



"Ant- pfffff Anta Baka." Leader continued to laugh uproariously, while Shiki seemed to quiet down. He frowned a bit, wondering what he did that was so funny? He decided to file that away for later, mentally checking if he had all the ingredients required. He confirmed that he did in fact have everything required. He hoped Misato wouldn't mind German food today. She said she lived in Germany before so she should be fine.

As the door to Casa de Katsuragi opened, Shinji was assaulted by a smell so horrific that his lizard brain's fight or flight instinct activated, and overloaded into nonfunctionality. He stumbled into the apartment proper and muttered a weak "I'm home?".

Unfortunately, Kitchen Catastrophe Katsuragi heard her prey's terrified whimpering and pounced. "Welcome back, Shinji! How was your first day?"

"It was?" Shinji's language center was failing him as he beheld the kitchen and the terror that was wrought within. To call it a mess would be like calling Second Impact a mildly unpleasant day. The errant pots and pans were strewn about haphazardly, remnants of failed(?) cooking attempts lined the walls, and the smell wasn't describable with any word known to man or beast.

"Yeah, first days are like that. But I figured you'd be tired, so I made dinner. Enjoy!~" Leader had tactically retreated at the first sign of trouble, while Shiki clamped onto his neck like it was a life raft, her eyepatch shining blue and her breathing panicked. He stared at the 'food' sitting on the table. His survival instinct warred with his deeply ingrained politeness and urge to avoid conflict before one won out.

"I mustn't run away..." he muttered, causing Shiki to freeze. He sat down at the table and weighed his options. Deciding that the bowl of what looked like soup would be a good starting point, he took a spoonful and instantly regretted his decision. As soon as the broth entered his mouth, he was assaulted by a sense of dryness as if all moisture was sucked out of his mouth by the broth. His hand shot out for a glass of nearby water, gulping it down before nearly spitting it back out. Why does the water taste burnt!? He gazed at the final dish, a plain plate of rice covered in a non-Newtonian magenta mass that he swore was staring at him. He grabbed a spoon and scooped some up, noting it was like an airy cream and a solid rock. He was barely cognizant of Shiki shaking him, begging him to stop, but he still took a bite out of wait, why was he staring at a vaguely familiar ceiling?

He was then informed by a very worried nurse (and two screaming tiny redheads) that he was in the Geofront hospital's ICU after getting his stomach pumped. Apparently, he broke a world record by eating two spoonfuls of Misato's cooking and only being unconscious for eight hours.

"It's official, I'm banning Misato from the kitchen," he grumbled as Leader and Shiki were pummeling his head.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kozo Fuyutsuki filed away the last of the paperwork 'bequeathed' upon him by the Commander. He was certain Gendo wanted to give him more, but as much as he appeared to be a figurehead Sub-Commander, he was responsible for keeping NERV efficient and running. Not that it was easy lately, with the Ishim performing constant acts of minor anarchy all around. Not that he could be mad at them; they reminded him too much of Kyoko and Yui during their college days for that. Those two were always minor troublemakers in their good-natured quest to one-up the other. A pang of sadness hit his heart, the memories of those days weighed heavily on him. Thankfully, fate saw fit to provide him with a distraction.

"Anta Baka?" Fuyutsuki blinked as he just noticed the Ishim standing on his desk. She was different from the others. She was wearing a lab coat on top of the plugsuit, her hair was tied up in a ponytail and she wore a pair of glasses. A near spitting image of Kyoko during her lab days, Fuyutsuki mused. She even had a tiny name tag that introduced her as 'Professor Soryu'.


Professor Soryu (?)

"Hello there, Professor, how may I help you?" Fuyutsuki thought to use this opportunity as a way to gain insight into the Ishim. Also, he was curious as to what she wanted with him. She pantomimed a familiar shape with her hands that he instantly recognized. "Oh, Shogi! Well, I have the time if you want to humor an old man." He opened his desk drawer and pulled out his Shogi board. His eyes lingered longingly on the dusty box of 'Chutes and Ladders' that lay underneath the Shogi board. "One day," he muttered. "One day."



"Baka?"

"Hmm? Oh, nothing. Shall we begin, Professor?" She nodded, and soon they were playing. Fuyutsuki, while no master, was an experienced player, but even he was having trouble matching the tiny Professor. Her moves were calculating and controlled, like Kyoko's, but there were bursts of spontaneous randomness that reminded him of Mary's playstyle. It was completely different than what he was used to nowadays. His only opponent being the Commander, whose playstyle was altered every time they played, just enough to throw him off and force him to adapt. His mind couldn't help but return to an older, simpler time when he was a professor in charge of dealing with four rowdy youngsters who wanted to change the world. Unfortunately, the world did change and not for the better.

"Baka." He was brought out of his musings by the Professor, as it seems that while he was distracted by his recollections, his king was defeated.

"I see an excellent showing, Professor. I must be getting rusty in my old age." A glance at the clock showed that his free time was nearly at an end. "I certainly enjoyed that, but it appears I have more work to get through. If you ever want to humor an old man for another game, please do come again." She nodded, but instead of leaving, she grabbed a pen and a Post-It note. She struggled writing due to the pen being nearly as tall as she was, but she apparently succeeded as she slapped the note down in front of him before strutting off, displaying pride in what she had done. He grabbed the note as she left his office, inspecting it like he was inspecting an ancient document. After minutes of analyzing it, he came to one conclusion. "Her penmanship is terrible. I can't understand what she wrote."

Unfortunately, she was long gone, leaving him with a mystery to ponder and paperwork to fill out.


Notes:
Author's Note from Fanfiction.net | "Flädlesuppe aka pancake soup is a real German dish surprisingly enough, and Shinji's bad german is very funny to the Minisukas. And there's a new scholarly Minisuka going around, probably doing science and such. Anyway, hope you all enjoy, as always leave a review if you like, and have a pleasant day."

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it. This is Part 1 which contains ten chapters, and hopefully Part 2 will be along soon.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-08-01
Words: 3,127

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?

Notes: (See the end of the work for notes.)


Chapter 7: Shamshel vs Mismatched Aesthetics

The sun rose over Tokyo-3 yet again, its massive skyscrapers rising from the ground like blooming flowers. Shinji woke up, Shiki staring at him unblinkingly, Leader and Misato dueling for the bathroom, and Pen-Pen arguing with someone foreign over the phone like usual. It had been a few weeks since his dread encounter with Misato's cooking, and her subsequent ban from cooking on penalty of penguin-inflicted tasering. Rei returned to school in that time, and mostly ignored his attempts to talk with her, citing 'vengeance' as the reason. He still tried, though - she looked lonely and he wanted to try and at least build up a rapport with his fellow pilot. On the bright side, he did make some friends. Kensuke, who was always talking to him, or at him, about military matters, occasionally tried to get Shinji to let something slip about the Evas. The Class Rep would occasionally join in and vent about her experience with her trio of Minisukas, much to Leader's bemusement. Honestly, he was finding his time in Tokyo-3 to be not so bad. Though he couldn't help but think he had forgotten something….

________________________________________

"Hey, new kid!"

Shinji stiffened; he didn't recognize that voice.

"You that giant robot pilot?"

He turned around to see a tall athletic boy he had never seen before slowly approaching him. Shinji opened his mouth to respond, but he was cut off.

"Don't bother. My pal Kensuke here spilled the beans." Shinji's eyes darted to Kensuke, who was shaking his head rapidly while holding up his hands like he was being held at gunpoint. "Yer flailin' around nearly killed me and put my sister in the hospital. Got anything to say for yerself?"

Oh. That's what he forgot. In his defense, the day he was told that he was inflicted with Misato's cooking, which he had to actively suppress the memories of. Leader and Shiki were getting into fighting stances on his shoulder, Leader summoning(?) her spear. The Suzuhara(?) boy was right in front of him, staring at him with barely contained rage.


(Touji Suzuhara cosplay by Isami)

"Uh…." Shinji had to deescalate this situation fast, so he went to his tried and true standby. "I'm sorry-" Before his face got acquainted with a fist, his instincts honed from Evangelion simulations and avoiding Misato's drunken grapples allowed him to clumsily dodge out of the way of the punch. "I-I didn't even finish talking!"

"Words're cheap, new kid, and they don't help my sister walk again! So grit yer teeth- OW!" Looking down, Touji saw a Minisuka had stabbed him in the ankle with her lance.

"Hey Touji, I think you should maybe stop…" Kensuke, who was currently attempting to hide inside a nearby discarded cardboard box, had brought Touji's attention to his surroundings- "Because I'm pretty sure yer outnumbered." -and the horde of Minisukas now surrounding him.

"Wha?" Touji had a creeping feeling of dread rise up from the pit of his stomach at the sight of the Minisukas coming out of the woodworks. Or perhaps it was the school lunch he ate earlier - they were cutting lunch budgets and 'ninety-three percent fake synthetic 'meat' from concentrate' did not sound like it meshed well with the digestive system. "Wait, yer those little Red Demons that killed the big monster instead of this idiot - OW!" Another Minisuka had given his ankle a casual shanking with her lance. "Stop that!" Touji began to back away as the Minisukas began to encroach upon him with malicious intent.

Thankfully for him, the atmosphere of conflict was broken by a phone ringing. Shinji pulled out his cellphone with embarrassment. "Oh, sorry. Can I take this?"

"Oh, yeah, sure. Take yer time," Touji said nonchalantly.

"Thank you. Hello?" Shinji answered and was met by an automated message instructing him to get to the Geofront. "Uh, sorry, Suzuhara, it looks like we'll need to continue this later. I have to go." Shinji bowed his head apologetically and left with Leader and Shiki. The rest of the Minisukas seemed confused about how to proceed until the Angel alarm started blaring and all their eyes widened in near unison. As one, the Germentide parted for parts unknown, leaving behind two confused boys.

"The hell just happened?"



________________________________________

The Section Two escort was waiting at the school gates along with Rei, and once Shinji arrived, they were ushered into the escort car and driven to the Geofront posthaste. Leader and Shiki were whispering to each other behind his neck - about what he couldn't tell, but he assumed it was about the Angel.

"So, do we have any information about the Angel?" he tried asking the Section Two members escorting him, but they did not deign to answer him. Rei, who had been seated next to him, continued to stare ahead blankly, seemingly not interested in what was going on. "Uh….. Leader, Shiki? Are your….. friends going to help?" They stopped their hushed conversation to look at him before they gave him a thumbs up. He took that as a yes. "Great, thanks!" He felt relief upon hearing he wouldn't be alone out there, though he hoped none of the Minisukas would get hurt.

Arriving at the Geofront, he quickly suited up and made his way to the Eva Cages, entering the Entry Plug with Leader and Shiki.

"Alright Shinji, the Angel is arriving in T-minus thirty minutes, so here's the rundown of what you're going to do." Misato's voice echoed through the Entry Plug as it began to fill up with LCL. "We don't know what tricks the Angel will have up its sleeves, so we'll keep our opening move simple. We'll provide you with a Pallet Rifle near your deployment location. Use that so we can gauge the Angel's defensive capabilities. Keep mobile in case it also has ranged attacks and keep an eye out for any tricks it might pull. Any questions?"

"N-None, Misato." Wow, serious Misato is way different than normal Misato.

"Good, you're launching in ten to fifteen. Be prepared." His comms went silent, leaving him with Leader and Shiki, who appeared to be fiddling with the main console.

"Is…. everything alright with….. that?" He still had trouble recalling the technical names of the various Entry Plug components, and so did most of the workers from what he heard. Apparently, every part had some sort of biblical name that nobody could remember. As he had never even touched the book, he tried to learn the less complicated terms the cage workers used instead of trying to recall what a 'Babelian Transpondence Device' was.

"Anta Baka." Leader gave him a 'so-so' motion with her hand without looking at him. He nodded even though she probably wouldn't see it. They did this whenever they got in the Entry Plug with him, fiddling around with the systems. It always infuriated Doctor Akagi when they did, proclaiming that she was the one that had to undo the modifications they made. They always flipped her off in response. It was becoming a game between them - Leader and Shiki would come up with elaborate methods to flip her off, and Doctor Akagi would learn new and possibly 'colorful' ways to insult them in German.

They waited in silence until he felt the Entry Plug alight in a burst of colors as he felt his senses become one with the Eva's once more. He felt the cold steel of the launch catapult fastened to his frame, the pressure of the g-force as he was thrown upwards, and the sting of fear as he spotted the distant form of the Angel on the horizon.



It had a body that reminded him of a tube worm with an arrow-shaped head, and nothing else. It approached slowly as he grabbed the Pallet Rifle from the weapon depot and took aim. It stopped a fair distance away, observing him as he was observing it. He subconsciously centered the Angel in his aiming peripheral, waiting for it to do something. He could feel Leader and Shiki tense on his shoulders, waiting for the inevitable to begin.

His comms crackled to life and Misato's voice rang out. "Shinji, engage when ready. Give it hell."

He gave a grunt of affirmation and pulled the trigger, letting loose a torrent of minivan-sized bullets towards the Angel. The staccato of gunfire filled his ears as the rounds struck true, impacting the Angel and a fair bit of the surrounding area, throwing up a smokescreen of debris to cloud the target. Realizing he had lost sight of the Angel, he began moving around while keeping its last known location in his sight.

"Remember the basics," he muttered to himself, the lessons of his Eva combat training coming to the forefront of his mind. "Keep mobile, stay aware of umbilical cable's length, keep an eye on the Angel, aim for the core, don't run away." He kept moving between large buildings as he kept an eye on the debris cloud.

"No visual on sensors but the Pattern Blue is persisting. The Angel is still alive," he heard Doctor Akagi say.

"What's it doing? Shinji, move to the weapon depot west-northwest of your current position. Try using the Gatling Gun in there to-"

Misato's words were cut off when a tendril of light burst from the cloud and launched towards him. He instinctively backstepped away as it implanted itself into the ground where he had been standing. He raised the rifle to unload a salvo into the tendril when out of the corner of his eye he saw the Angel burst out of the cloud. Using the tendril like a grappling hook, the Angel propelled itself toward Unit-01 like an angry semi-truck covered in sledgehammers. It smashed into him, launching him into the air towards a hillside on the outskirts of Tokyo-3 and sending his rifle to parts unknown. Amidst the yelling over the comms and the yelling of Leader and Shiki arguing with each other, he couldn't help but look at the empty hillside and think something was missing. Deducing that nothing was missing and that was the recent Angel-induced head trauma talking, he slowly got up, ready to get back in the fight.

________________________________________

Angel Shelter 17-B: Earlier

Touji Suzuhara rubbed his sore ankles idly. "Ya know Ken, I half 'spected ya ta want to go out there and film whatever crazy fight is going on out there."

"My friend Touji Suzuhara, why I, Kensuke Aida, would never do something so foolhardy as go out of the shelter during a crisis. I am insulted you'd think I would."

"Why the hell are ya talking like that, Ken?"

Kensuke was pale and sweating bullets, trying not to look in the Class Rep's direction. Curious, Touji looked over at the Class Rep. Just for curiosity's sake mind you, not for any hidden feelings towards her. He was met with the glare of three Red Demons, their stares daring the two of them to do something stupid. Touji, not being as stupid as most claim him to be, put two and two together and decided he didn't want to get stabbed in the ankles anymore today. "Ah, right. Ya wouldn't do something like that, Ken."

"Of course, my friend! Don't worry, all is forgiven." An uncomfortable silence passed between them. "So…. how about the local sports team, huh?"

Touji sighed. It was going to be a long day.

________________________________________

The mood in the NERV command center was tense as the occupants tried to adapt to the situation.

"Those tendrils appear to allow for it to cross large distances and are potentially dangerous weapons. We need to-"

"The MAGI are detecting new contacts!" Hyuga called out, interrupting Ritsuko.

"What!? Another Pattern Blue?" Misato and Ritsuko called out in unison.

"No…. it's…. well…. Bringing it on screen now."

A dozen camera feeds were brought up, showing a curious sight. A fleet of RC cars painted red and kitbashed to look like post-apocalyptic raider vehicles manned by Minisukas. This was accompanied by a large flock of mismatched birds of different breeds ridden by even more Minisukas. Apparently, the cavalry had arrived and they couldn't decide between a post-apocalyptic or fantasy aesthetic. The command center was engulfed by a stunned silence, once again due to the arrival of the tiny reinforcements. Until Ritsuko broke the silence.

"Aoba, put the guitar away!"

"Come on! This needs some music!"

"We are not dignifying those little gremlins with a soundtrack!"

Suddenly the MAGI announcement system was brought online. "Initiating playlist: Songs to Kill Angels to."

"Mother, why?" Ritsuko put her face into her hands as she was drowned out by some rock song.



________________________________________

The Fourth Angel, Shamshel, expected many things. It expected to face the same force that felled its sibling. It planned to counter the threat of the Lilim's forces through the creative use of its Light Whips to increase its mobility and ensure its success. Unfortunately, no plan survives first contact with the Minisukas.

The two forces of Minisukas descended upon the Fourth Angel with deadly intent. RC cars circled the Angel like sharks, lances launching from them like harpoons at a sea monster. The wing of bird riders performed strafing attacks as the calls of pigeons, doves, crows, eagles, and one very misplaced spoonbill echoed throughout Tokyo-3.

Shamshel, not expecting this type of assault, tried to prioritize which target to attack while defending its core. Its choice became clear when it saw the form of Unit-01 charging towards it. It lanced its whips dead center towards the charging giant, piercing through it and severing its cable. Satisfied with the damaged, Shamshel made to remove the whips from the abdomen of Unit-01 before the Eva grabbed the whips and used them to pull itself toward Shamshel. The Angel had but one thought at this.

Oh no.

________________________________________

Shinji Ikari was screaming. Not in pain, okay somewhat in pain, but in rage. When he saw the Angel eyeing(?) the Minisukas, he knew it was going to hurt them. He felt a small fire light up inside him - the fire told him, urged him, to help them defeat the Angel. So he charged, ignoring whatever Misato was saying (he couldn't hear her over the music anyway), and made to take down the monster while it was distracted. Unfortunately, it wasn't as distracted as he would have liked, so now he felt like a hole was in his gut. He didn't let that, or Leader and Shiki screaming at him, discourage him from grabbing the whips embedded in his gut. He made to pull the Angel toward him, but instead, he was brought closer to the Angel. Not what he intended but he would take what he can get.

He continued to scream in rage (and a not insubstantial amount of pain) as he was brought closer to the Angel, who was struggling to free itself from his grip. Closer and closer he got, plating on the Eva's hand began to slough off due to the whip's heat, but he was close enough to put an end to this [{eykilledh}] monster. He took both whips in one hand, grabbed the progressive knife from the shoulder pylon, and stabbed and stabbedandstabbedandstabbedandstabbedand

"Baka Shinji!" The phantom pain of the gut wound subsided as the real pain of being dropkicked in the jaw by a tiny redhead replaced it. Shinji blinked as he saw what the Eva saw, and it saw a red core that had been shredded to pieces. He then saw the dead Angel to go with it, then nothing as the Eva lost power. He looked to Leader and Shiki floating in the LCL, who stared at him with angry expressions.

"Mission accomplished?"

The official report would state that the various wounds Shinji received was because of the fight with the Angel, despite the various punch and kick marks indicating otherwise.

________________________________________

There were cheers in the command center as victory music played, much to Ritsuko's annoyance. The Commander and Sub-Commander had left after the Angel was declared dead.

The head of Project E sighed as she turned to her best friend. "Hey, Misato, how much beer do you have squirreled away?"

"Plenty. But none for you."

Ritsuko's eye twitched at that. "Why?" There was enough venom in her voice to fell a herd of elephants.

"You gave Pen-Pen a taser. You can get your own booze for now. Anyway, I'm going to take Shinji home. I'm sure you need to deal with the Angel corpse in the middle of the city. Have fun Rits!~" Misato left to go get her charge as Ritsuko was left with a headache and not enough booze to deal with it. She groaned and began to get to work.

"No rest for the wicked."

________________________________________

"-and I realize you couldn't hear me over the music, but letting yourself get impaled is not a valid military tactic, despite what the medieval Turks thought." Misato's car ramped over an errant piece of debris and into the apartment parking lot. "Understood, Shinji?"

"Misato, I don't think the Turks let Dracula impale them, nor was it considered a military tactic." Shinji knew Dracula wasn't the right name for the man, but he couldn't bring himself to care through the pain of Leader and Shiki constantly pinching him in punishment. "But yes, I understand."

"Great! Also, we need to go in for a debriefing first thing tomorrow morning. Let's go get some food!"



Shinji sighed as he contemplated the lessons he had learned today. First, the Minisukas were extremely protective of him, something he probably should have figured out before. Second, Leader and Shiki would be very angry with him if he put himself in harm's way. Finally, he shouldn't forget the problems he might have caused no matter how much of Misato's cooking was involved.

"I'm home," he muttered as he walked into the apartment, his mind drawing up plans for dinner. Misato was already walking towards the fridge, intent on her celebratory beer. The snap of a can opening graced his ears before Misato took a large swig…. before spitting it out. She stared at the beer in her hand and the others in her fridge as her eyes narrowed.

"Why the hell is all my beer non-alcoholic?!"

The only response was Leader's stifled giggling.


Notes:

Author's Note from Fanfiction.net | “Shamshel has been defeated and I dread the next action scene I have to write! As you can see the Angel fights might be slightly different than you remember, the reason for that is that the Butterfly Effect is a bitch sometimes. Hope you all enjoy, leave a review if you want, and have a pleasant day.”

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it. This is Part 1 which contains ten chapters, and hopefully Part 2 will be along soon.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-08-05
Words: 3,030

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?

Notes: (See the end of the work for notes.)


Chapter 8: Crimson Septuple Hypermax


(Sakura Suzuhara art by fukumimix)

Sakura Suzuhara was many things. Eight years old, a little sister, victor of the Tokyo-3 Junior Spear Throwing Championship two years running, and not entirely sure where this thought process was going. Boredom was making her loopy, as were the painkillers they were injecting into her to make her crushed legs hurt less. She wasn't disappointed that she might be crippled for life - that was her fault for not evacuating when the giant monster showed up. She, however, was disappointed when the doctors refused her request to amputate her legs and replace them with metal ones that she could use to fight crime in the night. With that, her dream of becoming a cyborg vigilante was struck down for the fourth time in her short life. Her attention returned to her room's TV as she flipped through the channels.

"What are we going to do, Mister Shiroi?"

"We're going to cook, Jeshi."

"Boring." She didn't want to watch a cooking show, they were boring. The channel changed at her command.

"Come down ta Waltoph's Cursed Animatronic Emporium, where our products are less likely ta kill ya than the best leading competitors, guaranteed!"

"Ugh, no. Those things are creepy." The channel changed once more.

"Oh, Hidalgo! How could you do this to me? I thought we were in love!?"

"Oh dang, they got dubbed telenovelas here? Score!" Sakura wished she had some popcorn instead of whatever hospital slop they kept giving her, but beggars couldn't be choosers.

"Anta Baka?"

"I know, right? It's crazy." Oh, she almost forgot her new imaginary friend. She looked at the tiny redheaded girl that kept calling Sakura an idiot that appeared in all the hubbub yesterday. Honestly? Not her first choice for an imaginary friend, but she wasn't complaining. Well, not vocally at least. She was complaining internally. A lot.

"Baka."

"Well, excuse me, but who's the one with the crushed legs here? That's right, me! So I get control of the remote, Crimson Septuple Hypermax!" That's her name, Crimson Septuple Hypermax. It's a great name if you'd ask her. But Crimson Septuple Hypermax didn't like being called Crimson Septuple Hypermax for some reason. Sakura would give her a new name if she didn't call her an idiot all the time. But she didn't, so her name was Crimson Septuple Hypermax.

"Hey, Sakura." Her musings were broken by the arrival of her brother, Touji, looking all dejected. "Sorry I couldn't get here earlier, lotta damage 'round the city. Had ta take a detour….." His eyes locked onto Crimson Septuple Hypermax, who in return was glaring at her brother. "Oh no." Wait, could he see-

"Anta Baka!" Crimson Septuple Hypermax screamed out a warcry while charging toward her brother. Thankfully, she'd prepared for this exact scenario and nobody can prove otherwise. She executed her master plan of grabbing Crimson Septuple Hypermax and holding her really tightly.

"Once again, my plan is a success! What's gotten into you, Crimson Septuple Hypermax?"

"Wait, what did you just call-"

"Shut up, bro! We're doing girl talk!"

"Anta Baka."

"What?! Touji! How could you?!"

"You can understand her?!"

"Of course I can understand my imaginary friend! What I can't understand is why you tried to kill her husband after he rejected your declaration of love!"

"What/Baka!?" Twin shouts echoed out in the small hospital room. Crimson Septuple Hypermax was blushing furiously, no doubt in rage.

"I thought you were better than that, Touji! And I thought you were interested in Hikari!"

"I am! Uh, I mean, uh...." Now he was blushing in rage, no doubt because his fiendish, dramatic plan was revealed. "It's not that! I tried ta beat up the pilot of that giant robot that hurt'cha!"

"That's worse!"

"How?!"

"Touji, my idiot brother who I love so much, it was an accident! I should have stopped searching for that lost Incan gold when the alarm rang out, but I didn't. So it's my fault!"

"Wait, what was that about lost Incan-"

"Don't interrupt me!" she shouted, the painkiller's effects abating in her prepubescent fury. "Go find that robot pilot and apologize for being such a butt to him or so help me I will crawl over there and give you such a thrashing!"

"Uhhhh...." He looked at her, looked at Crimson Septuple Hypermax, then back to her. "Y-yes, Sakura." He quickly darted away, leaving Sakura alone with Crimson Septuple Hypermax.

"Good." She let go of Crimson Septuple Hypermax, who was staring at her in shock. "Brothers are dumb sometimes, Crimson Septuple Hypermax, so you have to set them on the path of not dumb. You understand?" Crimson Septuple Hypermax nodded. "Great! Now let's get back to this telenovela. The kung fu death match is about to start."

"Annabella, I will now show you the technique of my ancestors, ONE FLURRY OF FISTS AT A TIME!"

Hopefully, with her dumb brother set on the right track, the robot pilot (she should ask for his name next time) was going to have a great day!


(Art by [Nebuchadnezzar's Key] Evangelion Neta/Photoshop Image Supplement Project [Vatican Treaty])

--------------------------------------------------------------

Shinji Ikari was not having a great day. He and Misato went all the way to the Geofront to do a final debriefing, but nobody was there because they were all at the Angel's corpse. So they drove over there only to get told by Doctor Akagi that the debriefing wasn't required. Misato, however, needed to go back to the Geofront to fill out paperwork, meaning he needed to walk home (he didn't want to suffer Misato's driving any more that day). It was only after thirty minutes of walking in the general direction of where he thought Misato's apartment was did he realize that he was lost.

"Anta Baka!"

"Baka?!"

His status of being lost wasn't helped by Leader and Shiki having different ideas about where to go. So while they were arguing, he was at the train station trying to reverse engineer his school route in order to figure out a way back home.

"Ikari?"

Shinji turned to look at the unexpected, and disheveled, visage of Kensuke. "Kensuke? What are you doing here? Do you live around here?"

A loud clatter rang out deeper in the train station.

"No, long story. Walk with me, talk with me." Kensuke began pushing him into the empty train car. Leader and Shiki had stopped their arguing to look at him strangely. "Look, we don't want to be here in the next five minutes so I'll pay your train fare. We just need to get out of here NOW!"

"Wha?" As he was pushed onto the train and the doors began to close, a group of foreign men in suits and with guns began to rush onto the platform. "Ահա նա! Ձեռք բերեք փոքրիկ բռետին! Ցույց տվեք նրան, որ մեզ հետ չխառնվի!"1 a man with a large scar dominating half his face shouted out. Soon enough, bullets began to pelt the train car, causing Shinji and Kensuke to scream as they ducked.

"Kensuke, what the hell?!" Shinji felt the train car move away as Leader began to grab his phone from his pocket.

"Long story short, I tried to get bootleg footage of yesterday's fight and I somehow got into a blood feud with the Armenian mafia."

"How?!"



Leader was screaming something into his phone as the sound of gunfire began to recede, the train moving further away.

"Not entirely sure, I may have flirted with someone's mother. Never buy used Japanese to Armenian translation guides. Say, you got a place we can hunker down?"

Shinji was slightly annoyed that his friend had gotten him into this mess, but his desire to be helpful so as not to get hated won out. "Uh, my apartment? It's got a protective detail that should keep us safe."

Thinking about it, now that he wasn't in immediate danger, where was his personal Section Two protective detail?

--------------------------------------------------------------

"Hey Yamada, weren't you supposed to go do security on the Third Child?"

"….Crap."

--------------------------------------------------------------

"Baka! Anta-Baka? Baka-Shinji!?" Leader was screaming into his cellphone at someone. Shiki was currently glaring daggers at Kensuke, who was trying to ignore being figuratively stabbed by her gaze.

"Cool, great, amazing. So….where is it?" Oh, right.

"I'm actually lost. I have no idea where we are right now."

"Ah." Kensuke gulped nervously. "Well, if you can get to your apartment from school, I think this track has a nearby station we can get off at."

"Good. Once we do, I know how to move around to avoid people so we can get there without being seen."

Kensuke blinked, his face scrunched up in thought, seemingly trying to formulate a response to that. "You know what? I'm going to leave the implication of that 'avoid people' thing untouched until after we ensure our safety from the mafia. Lead the way, Captain Ikari." Leader was apparently done with his phone as she handed it back to him.

"I don't think I actually have a rank other than Pilot, and I'm not sure where that-" Shinji blinked, realizing he'd just officially outed himself as the Eva Pilot.

Kensuke blinked before his smile grew absurdly large. "AHA! YOU FINALLY ADMITTED IT!"

Shinji sighed as he was assaulted with a barrage of questions as Leader and Shiki both facepalmed. He was not having a great day.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Avedis panted heavily, his one good eye trying to comprehend the horror before him. It was supposed to be simple - grab the brat who was trying to threaten/seduce his boss's grandmother and teach him a lesson, but it all went wrong. They meant to follow the train, chase down the brat, and save the boy he grabbed (no doubt to use as a hostage, the fiend), but they kicked a hornet's nest. Maybe the gunfire was ill-advised because it appeared to attract the wrong kind of attention.

"Աստվածամայր..."2 Before he or his men could understand, the demontide descended, dragging his men off into the shadows, leaving nothing behind but their screams. He stared at the dread horde approached him, their malice radiating off them in waves. "Ինչու եք դա անում?"3

"Anta Baka."

He screamed and knew no more.

--------------------------------------------------------------

"-and unfortunately while the core was recoverable, it was extremely damaged in the fight, leaving little usable remains."

"A pity, but understandable. We cannot expect to prioritize obtaining a semi-intact S2 Organ when the Angels are as dangerous as they are." Lorenz gazed around at the other members of SEELE, seeing if they had anything to add. When they remained silent, he continued. "What of the Ishim, Ikari?"

"While their method of engaging the Fourth Angel differed from the Third, they acted within expectations, despite their… unusual method of transportation." Lorenz once again gave the others a chance to interject, before-

"Where did they get the spoonbill?"

Despite only being able to see monoliths, Gendo could feel the other members of SEELE slowly turn to look at SEELE-4.

"I….. beg your pardon, what?" Gendo's patented finger steeple prevented the look of incredulity and confusion from showing on his face, but he was sure the other members of SEELE shared it.

"Yes, how is this relevant, Four?" Lorenz wasn't visibly affected, but the slight tinge of annoyance and confusion in his voice was unmistakable.

"Spoonbills aren't native to the Tokyo-3 region, or Japan in general, especially since Second Impact disrupted their migratory habits. How did they find it? Did they get it from a zoo? If we find out how they got it, we might be able to use that to control them."

"How do you know so much about spoonbills?" SEELE-10 inquired, genuinely curious.

"…..My wife forces me to go to environmental charity events. She drilled a lot of bird facts so she could beat her friend at a trivia contest."

A cascade of understanding murmurs broke out, followed by Lorenz clearing his throat to regain attention. "Ikari?"

"…..I'll look into it, though I can't guarantee I'll find anything."

"Very well, I feel we are done here. Keep us updated Ikari, and have that core sample delivered to the American branches post-haste." They didn't wait for him to answer before flickering out, leaving Gendo and Fuyutsuki alone once more.

"Should we bother with investigating the…. bird angle, Ikari?"

"Put it on a low priority for the Section Two investigative department. We have more important things to deal with."

"Understood. Hopefully, it ends up as more than a wild goose chase." Fuyutsuki smiled at his own joke and Gendo made a note to assign him more paperwork.



--------------------------------------------------------------

Walking in the shadows, Shinji and Kensuke inched closer to Misato's apartment, keeping an eye out for any mafia members who would threaten them. Soon enough, they were close enough to the complex to be able to see the Section Two agents patrolling out in the open, giving them a reprieve. A short while later, they were approaching the entrance to the apartment complex and saw a familiar tracksuited boy arguing with security.

"Look, I just wanna see Ikari. I ain't here ta fight 'em. I wanted ta apologize."

"Apologize?"

Touji turned to look at them. "Ikari, Kensuke? What happened ta ya two, ya look terrible."

Kensuke grimaced. "Long story, I'll tell you later, Touji."

"Alright. Anyway, Ikari, hit me." Touji stood straight, staring him in the eye. He could feel Leader roll her eyes and mutter something, probably some variation of 'Baka'. Shiki had retired to his shirt pocket for a nap, long since losing interest in whatever was going on.

"Huh?"

"Hit me. I tried ta hitcha cause I blamed ya fer hurting my sis, but she said it wasn't yer fault and told me ta apologize, so hit me."

Shinji tried to wrap his head around that logic, but really couldn't. Instead, he tried the route where he was less likely to hurt his hand. "I'd rather not hit you since you didn't actually hit me. Can I just accept your apology and we can start over?"

Touji stared at him for a moment, apparently contemplating the offer, before nodding. "Alright, we can just say ya have a free pass for a hit at a later time." He'd rather not but he didn't want to argue that. Touji thrust his hand out. "Touji Suzuhara, let's get along, Shin-man." Shin-man?

"Shin-man?" Shinji instinctively shook the preoffered hand.

"Yeah. Takes a man ta hold back when offered a free hit, so as far as I'm concerned, yer Shin-man now." He would rather not have that nickname, but he again didn't want to argue that.

"Nice as this is-" Kensuke piped up. "Can we get out of the open so we don't get attacked by the mafia?"

""The what?"" Touji and the security guard echoed in confusion.

"Right, the mafia. We should get inside. Do you mind if I bring my friends in?" The security guard looked baffled before nodding. He, Touji, and Kensuke started to walk in as the guard began to talk to someone on his walkie-talkie. Shinji was slightly baffled that he had managed to make a friend out of someone who wanted to beat him up yesterday, but he took it as a good sign. Perhaps today wasn't so bad after all.

"Wait." He blinked, realizing he was missing something or rather someone. "Where did Leader go?" Shiki opened her eye and made a show of looking around before shrugging her 'I don't know, that's her problem, not mine' shrug. He wondered where she went (and Touji looked around his feet to make sure he wasn't about to get stabbed again) but he figured that she was doing something important and that she'd be back in time for dinner. "Well, I'm sure she's fine."

--------------------------------------------------------------

Sightings and traffic of the Minisukas/Ishim were recorded and logged constantly by the MAGI, to ensure as much information as possible about these enigmatic entities was available. A rather obvious point of data was that the home of the Third Child, Shinji Ikari, was a focal point of their travel patterns. It was assumed that this was due to the importance of the Third Child to the Ishim. This was correct, yet it wasn't the only reason.

Leader made her way through the ventilation ducts of the apartment complex, following a path that was not on any blueprint to a location that did not exist on any NERV database thanks to some persuasive efforts towards the MAGI. She exited the final ventilation grate and emerged into a cavern of metal. A hollow area in the Tokyo-3 plates no doubt included as a cost-saving measure or a redundancy was now being utilized for a much grander purpose. Dozens of makeshift planning boards were surrounded by dozens of Minisukas, each preparing contingencies and fallbacks for plans regarding future events that may or may not happen. Tiny workbenches were building prototypes or modifying equipment they 'acquired'.

Leader frowned as she looked upon her people, working hard. They had a close call today because they didn't foresee the effects of their actions - something they would have to rectify. She shook her head and reminded herself that they would succeed. They were Asuka Langley Soryu, dammit, and they wouldn't give up. Not when he was on the line.

"Anta Baka." She slapped her face and approached the main planning table. She had work to do and no God or Angel was going to get in her way.


Notes:
Author's Note from Fanfiction.net | "Writing an eight-year-old on painkillers is simultaneously entertaining and challenging. My apologies to any Armenians reading this for butchering your language with google translate, and to telenovela fans for mocking your favorite media. Anyway, looks like the Minisukas have their own secret base, wonder what they're doing there? Probably just preparing fun little shenanigans and nothing plot-related whatsoever. In any case, hope you all enjoy, leave a review if you want, and have a pleasant day."

Google Translate, from Armenian:
1) "There he is! Get the little brat! Show him not to mess with us!"
2) "Mother of God..."
3) "Why are you doing this?"

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it. This is Part 1 which contains ten chapters, and hopefully Part 2 will be along soon.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/9 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-08-11
Words: 2,591

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?


Chapter 9: The Fortress of Soryutude

Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)


"-So that's what happened, Touji," Kensuke finished up his long and detailed explanation of the events that transpired. Shinji tuned out halfway through and began making some tea. Shiki was staring at Kensuke with a look that said 'You won't believe how disappointed I am in you,' and Touji just stared incredulously.

"Really, Ken? Ya gotta stop involving yerself with organized crime."

"Look, all my collectible military equipment isn't easy or legal to get so I have to make connections with some less than reputable people. Or I would if they didn't pack up and leave at the first sign of a giant monster attack!"

Shinji would argue that that is a perfectly reasonable time to pack up and leave, but he didn't want to argue with his friends.

"Whatever Ken, just don't drag me inta another one of yer meet n greets again. I still ain't forgiven ya fer that time with the Yakuza."

"I keep telling you I thought it was an underground idol concert. I didn't expect to be forced into becoming backup dancers for a crazy one-eyed Yakuza guy!"

"That don't stop the nightmares. I still hear the song in my sleep. So anyway, Shin-man-"

"Could you just call me Shinji?"

"Sure thing, Shin-man." Shinji's eye twitched. "Ya live here alone?"

"No, I live with my guardian, Misato, and my 'roommate' Pen-Pen." He paused. "Oh, and Leader and Shiki, of course." Shiki nodded in confirmation.

"Whose Pen-" Touji's query was cut off by Pen-Pen's refrigerator opening, and the penguin resident waddling out and retrieving a beer and returning without paying attention to any of them. "Oh. Yeah, that tracks."

"Wait, Misato? As in Captain Misato Katsuragi, Director of Operations at NERV?!" Kensuke exclaimed, like he was told his favorite actor was waiting in the next room.

"How… do you know that?"

"It's all on NERV's official website."

"NERV has a website?"

Any further exploration on the topic of NERV's web presence was interrupted when Shinji was tackled by the infamous Katsuragi Cannonball, still wanted in many parts of Europe for assault, battery, and public intoxication.

"Shinji! Are you okay?!" Misato shouted as she held him in a vicegrip.

"I'd be better if you weren't crushing me," Shinji managed to wheeze out using his slowly depleting oxygen.

Thankfully, Misato got the message and released her prey. "Sorry. I heard you got shot at, so I was worried."

"I'm fine. They only shot at the train car I was in."

"That doesn't make it okay! When I find whoever was on security for you at that time I'm gonna…"

Misato's undoubtedly torturous planning was interrupted by Touji. "Wait, yer one of the NERV bigwigs?"

Misato blinked, just noticing the other two boys in the room. "Oh, are you some of Shinji's friends? Welcome to my home! Would you like some food-" Pen-Pen's refrigerator opened and the penguin held out a gun-shaped taser menacingly, daring Misato to continue. "-yes, I am a higher-up at NERV, how can I help?" The taser retracted, its duty fulfilled for now.

"So uh-" Touji, considering the newly established hierarchy of the household he was now witnessed to, chose his words carefully. "Can ya tell us what's the deal with… these things?" He gestured to Shiki for emphasis. Unfortunately, he chose his words poorly.

"Well-"

"Don't call them things, Suzuhara," Shinji's voice suddenly spoke out with an uncharacteristic layer of venom.

Suddenly, all conversation died out as everyone turned to look at Shinji in naked shock, even the Minisukas watching from the air vents.

Touji, to his credit, looked ashamed as Shinji glared at him. "Oh, sorry Shin-man, I didn't-"

"Call me Ikari."

Touji blinked as he looked around for some kind of help with this, finding none he capitulated. "Sorry, Ikari. I didn't mean nothing by it."

Shinji glared at him a few moments more before returning his attention to the tea, his unusual spurt of anger evaporating. Shiki continued to stare at him in bafflement as everyone else collected their bearings.

"So-" Misato cut through the tension that was engulfing the atmosphere. "How about I get Section Two to drive you kids home?"

"Sounds good, Captain!" Kensuke saluted enthusiastically, desperate to escape the uncomfortable situation. "Sure, see ya later, Ikari?" Shinji merely hummed an affirmation without turning to look at him.

"Super! Just head to the elevator and Hiro will give you a hand," said Misato.

Kensuke and Touji nodded and quickly left, meeting the agent who guided them to the elevator, riding down with them.

"So…." Kensuke decided to break the ice with the agent.

His question was anticipated rather quickly. "The Katsuragi fan club meets Tuesdays and Thursdays at five pm in the office building on third street, floor seven. You're welcome to join, just bring some food."

"Score!" Kensuke's day was looking up, Touji just groaned.

------------------------------------------------------------

"So, Misato."

"Yeah, Shinji?"

"Will you be staying for dinner?"

"No, I got to get back to NERV, still got a ton of paperwork to fill out." She paused, studying Shinji for a moment as he began to pour out his tea. "Are you alright, Shinji?"

"I'm fine, Misato.Why do you ask?"

"No reason…. You know if you have any problems you can talk to me, right?"

"Thank you, Misato. I appreciate that."

"Mmmm...." Misato looked at Shiki with a 'is he really alright?' look. Shiki responded with an 'I'm just as confused about what just happened as you are' look, something that did not help Misato at all. "Well, stay home for the rest of the day, alright?"

"Alright, Misato. Good luck with your paperwork."

Misato didn't respond as she left the apartment, contemplating if the stress of fighting Angels was starting to negatively affect her ward.

"Would you like some tea as well, Shiki?" For his part, Shinji was acting as if the previous outburst never happened, something that was concerning to Shiki. She still accepted some tea - Shinji made some damn fine tea.

"Baka-Shinji?"

"I'm fine, Shiki, but thanks for asking. The gunfire was a bit of a surprise, but I wasn't hurt."

Shiki stared at him with an analytical gaze as she carefully drank the hot tea through a hollow cocktail stirrer. He appeared to be okay, and a careful study of his body language showed that he wasn't hiding anything. The fact he wasn't panicked right now was good in her eye as she didn't want him to feel endangered. The odd moment of aggression and his current calm demeanor was bugging her, but she couldn't figure out why.

Soon enough, a comfortable silence overtook them, both enjoying their tea. Shiki never stopped analyzing Shinji, but she put that mental process on a lower priority once she figured she wasn't getting anything for the time being. So they sat in silence, the events of the day melting away. Until Pen-Pen emerged from his fridge, demanding dinner.

------------------------------------------------------------


(Makoto Hyuga cosplay by Tatto and MinhP)

"It has come to my attention, through the use of the MAGI, that you were once known as a 'Prank Master' during your time in high school. In my quest for vengeance, I am in need of a teacher of such forbidden arts. I am prepared to offer you dread knowledge beyond comparison in order to gain your tutelage, or various other methods of repayment NERV is able to provide. Will you accept this offer?"

Makoto Hyuga stared at Rei Ayanami, as did the other bridge crew members present. "Hell of a way to start a conversation, Miss Ayanami." He waited for her to say something in response to that, but she just continued to stare at him, unblinkingly. "Right…. Uh… You have access to the MAGI?"

"Yes. I have obtained proper access codes from the Sub-Commander so I have use of the MAGI's capabilities. Is having the MAGI obtain something enough of a payment, Lieutenant Hyuga?"

"Yes?" Hyuga wasn't sure where this was going, but he had an idea of what to get out of this.

"What do you desire the MAGI to obtain? Is it images of Captain Katsuragi wearing less than her normal amount of clothing?"

Hyuga started to choke on air as he could feel the glare of every female bridge crew member boring a hole through him.

"N-no, I was wondering if the MAGI could erase my student loans." That got the attention of the entire room, who glared at him for a different reason. "All the bridge crew's student loans?"

"That should be doable. Consider our compact sealed, Lieutenant Hyuga. I will find you when you are free later, and the teaching shall begin." Ayanami walked off, her footsteps silent like a shadow, or perhaps a mime.

Once she left the room erupted into cheers, save for one. "Is anybody else concerned about that 'dread knowledge' thing she mentioned or is it just me?" Unfortunately, Satsuki Ooi's concerns were drowned out by the celebratory shouts.


(Satsuki Ooi)

------------------------------------------------------------

(The following scene has been translated from Minisukese in order to improve clarity and reduce confusion. Any confusion or lack of clarity that remains is either intentional or not our problem. Best Wishes- The underpaid translators.)

Leader glanced around the table at her gathered subordinates. "Alright, so now that we dealt with the mafia, not a sentence I'd thought I would say, how are our other plans going? We can't afford to be behind schedule with the Fifth right around the corner."

Professor pushed up her glasses. "Everything on the engineering side will remain on schedule barring any unforeseen interruptions. The first contingency is in place and is ready to be deployed on command. The second phase is progressing steadily as long as the materials continue to come in."

Leader nodded. "Good, now we just need to brainstorm about the Sixth, and how to deal with her."

"What about the Jet Alone?" someone queried.

"What about the Jet Alone?" Leader shot back.

"…..That's fair."

"Whatever. Get Hacker on it if she has a second. Speaking of Hacker, what is her ETA on draining the old fool's bank accounts?"

One Minisuka with a modified keypad phone called out. "Just got a message from her, says she's close to cracking one. We got a place to transfer the money to?"

"Yep, we've got a nice Swiss bank account from our avian friend. Just remember to send him a finder's fee." The orders and account numbers were relayed, and an affirmation was received. "Okay, how are we on plans for the others?"

An exhausted-looking Minisuka holding a thimble full of coffee answered her. "We're at an impasse on the Seventh and Eighth, as we can't agree on whether or not to let them happen without interference or not. It's important growth between them that could alter things in a way we couldn't predict if it doesn't happen."

"Scheiße, that's right. Put those on the back burner for now. Do we have a play on the Fifteenth?"

"Nope." The planning Minisuka took a big gulp of coffee. "Apparently building a surface to orbit weapon or mode of transportation isn't easy, even if you discount being eight inches tall from the equation."

"Wunderbar, and what of the….. 'less angelic' threats to our plans?"

"All quiet on Operation Tyrant's front. No sign of 'Red Honey', though the timeframe has yet to arrive. The first mission of Operation Cocoon is due in a few days' time."

"Keep me updated. Also, has anyone seen Prankster? I don't want her to provoke Wondergirl anymore than she already has - it's messing with our plans." To nobody's surprise, no one had seen her. "Great, keep an eye out. We're already playing this way looser than I would like. Alright, dismissed! I need to get back to watching over Idiot-Shinji."

A chorus of confirmations rang out as everyone went to fulfill their part of the plan. Leader went to head back to her post, secure in the thought that everything was going off without a hitch, altercations with the Armenian mafia notwithstanding. The road would be long and treacherous, but it was all for him in the end, and nothing would stop her again.



------------------------------------------------------------

A few days later

Mayumi Yamagishi was nose deep in a book as she walked home from school, dodging and weaving through errant passersby without even looking up, a skill developed through years of practice avoiding people. Her day at school was unremarkable, and nothing particular of note happened, just how she liked it.

"Anta Baka?" Mayumi blinked, looking around for where the voice she just heard came from, only to find she was alone in the isolated side street she now inhabited. "Baka." She looked down to find one of the tiny redheads that were often on the news lately staring at her.

"H-hi? C-can I help you?" Suddenly more came pouring out of nowhere surrounding her like a pack of wolves. "O-oh no, that fortune teller warned me this would happen!" Mayumi was panicking - she knew what was going to happen now. They were going to kidnap her and force her to write horoscopes in trashy tween magazines, the monsters! A group of them lugged out a weird device the size of a microwave, no doubt to be used to brainwash her into liking pop music! A flash of light blinded her and made her feel the taste of purple in her ears.

"Baka?" Once she regained her senses, she saw the redheads muttering to themselves as they looked at a screen before one turned to look at her and gave her a thumbs up and then an 'I'm watching you' motion. They then just swarmed away with the odd device in tow, leaving behind a confused Mayumi in their wake.

"W-w-w-what just happened?" Did she just undergo some kind of existence-altering procedure? Was she going to slowly turn into an eight-inch tall redhead? She needed an expert in this field to explain things. Who was the boy in 2-A she heard about that was apparently able to tame them? Oh right, Shinji Ikari.

"Shinji Ikari, I need to find Shinji Ikari so I don't turn into a small redhead." Mayumi let out a panicked giggle as she tried to get back into her book. For better or worse, things were getting interesting.


(Mayumi Yamagishi)

------------------------------------------------------------

Germany: The exact same time

Asuka paused as her spoonful of cereal stopped midway to its destination, her eyes narrowing in suspicion and confusion. "I don't know why, but I have the sudden urge to strangle a girl in glasses." Asuka mulled over this feeling for a moment longer before returning to her breakfast.


Notes:
Author's Note from Fanfiction.net | "Hope you enjoyed the look into the Minisuka planning, cause it's not going to happen often, those Minisukese translators aren't easy to come by. Quite a few things were mentioned and hinted at, so to answer what is undoubtedly the most important question, yes Hacker Minisuka is a cool 90s hacker. Also for those of you unaware, Satsuki Ooi is an extracanonical character originating from the 'Shinji Ikari Raising Project' game where she is a NERV bridge bunny in charge of monitoring the Casper portion of the MAGI and a romance option. She was also in 'Evangelion Detective (Detective Evangelion?)'. While Mayumi Yamagishi is the main romance option in the 'Second Impressions' game. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy. Leave a review if you can and have a pleasant day."

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it. This is Part 1 which contains ten chapters, and hopefully Part 2 will be along soon.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-08-17
Words: 4,964

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?


Chapter 10: Ramiel vs Distraction Artillery

Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)


Ritsuko Akagi hated her job sometimes. Between overseeing the MAGI, the Evas, and every other minor scientific division in the Geofront, it was a wonder she didn't snap. Not to mention the Ishim causing her no small amount of grief. They were planning something, she was sure of it. She was sure they altered the MAGI somehow, she was sure they were watching her when she wasn't looking, and she was sure they were feeding her cat when she wasn't home. Now, that last part wasn't bad. In fact, she was somewhat thankful for it, but she was positive they were just doing it to mess with her.

Her musings on her recent Ishim woes were interrupted when the Katsuragi Cyclone burst into her office like a wind of destruction. "Hey Rits, whatcha doing?" her dear friend Misato inquired with way too much pep.

"Work, something which you should be doing yourself."

"I'll get back to that in a bit. I've noticed we haven't really hung out in a while."

"Sterling observation, Captain. How many Irish Coffees did it take for you to notice that?"

"Three, I think? Anyway, I was thinking I should invite you to my home for some food-"

Ritsuko wordlessly pulled a gun out of her office drawer and placed it on her desk. Misato eyed it wearily as Ritsuko begged her to continue with that line of thought.

"-that Shinji will happily provide as he is an excellent cook."

The gun was returned to the drawer, its purpose fulfilled for now. "Mmmm..." Ritsuko mulled it over for a bit and came to a decision. "Alright, I could use a break. Tonight?"

"Tonight," Misato nodded before a thoughtful expression came over her. "Oh, and lay off the Minisukas for tonight. Shinji's been….. irritable in regards to them the past week."

Ritsuko raised an eyebrow at that. "Irritable? How so?" Irritable did not match the Third Child's psych profile in any way - she needed to get to the bottom of this.

"Well, he gets really snippy when he thinks you're insulting them. At first, he just glared and told you to stop, but he's kinda 'mellowed' and now he's just passive aggressive about it, even then he's getting less so."

"Odd, he doesn't seem the type."

"I know, otherwise he's such a good boy, kind and helpful towards others. Perhaps it's just nerves from being shot at by gangsters."

"A plausible theory, if any. Well, if any problems come up, we should maybe get one of NERV's therapists to see him."

"We have therapists?"

Ritsuko opened her mouth to reply when she realized something - she actually didn't know if they had therapists. "I'm…. not sure actually. We should? I'll have to get back to you on that."

"Riiiiight. Anyway, you need a lift there?"

Ritsuko paled, shuddering at the thought of being subjected to the only thing as bad as Misato's 'cooking', Misato's driving. "No, I'd rather not have whiplash, thank you very much. I'll get there on my own."

"Suit yourself. See you later tonight, Rits." The Katsuragi Cyclone left, leaving behind a bemused Ritsuko.

"Well, perhaps I can get the Third to deliver Rei's card while I'm there. I sure as hell don't want to set foot in that death trap she calls a home."


(Ritsuko Akagi cosplay by Onyxia Sophinikum) (Misato Katsuragi cosplay by Maria Adamae Sapogova)

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The police force of Tokyo-3 let out a collective shudder, for the stars had aligned, and the Red Horsemen of War, Ritsuko Akagi, would ride once more.

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Shinji had the odd feeling that he was being watched, and not in the usual way where he was sure that Shiki or one of the other Minisukas were staring at him when he wasn't looking. It was more the feeling of an average-sized person he didn't know watching him. Also, there was the brown-haired girl with glasses he saw staring at him from time to time, perhaps she had an idea of who was watching him? Something to worry about tomorrow, now he just needed to worry about dinner.

"I'm home!" he called out, despite knowing Misato wasn't home yet. Still, it made him feel good knowing he could say that. Leader and Shiki gave their own greeting - well, he assumed they were greetings. Leader climbed off him to go do whatever she did when he wasn't looking while Shiki lazed about on top of his head.

"Wark!" Surprisingly his greeting was returned by Pen-Pen, who was at the kitchen table manning his personal laptop while wearing his pair of 'business' glasses (what made the glasses suited for business was something Shinji never figured out).

"Oh, hey Pen-Pen, day trading again?"

"Wark!" Pen-Pen squawked in affirmation, before returning to his business.

"Any preferences for dinner?"

Pen-Pen shrugged, meaning he didn't care one way or the other. Leader went to the balcony today, which usually meant she preferred something light, while Shiki tapped on his head in a way that meant she would like some sausages. Light but with sausages - he could work with that. So Shinji began to cook, his self-appointed sous chef, Shiki, assisting wherever possible. At some point when he wasn't looking, Leader had come to the table and had begun whispering conspiratorially to Pen-Pen. He couldn't understand what either was saying (for obvious reasons) but from the gestures, he could guess it had to do with bank accounts and… chickens maybe?

Before he could contemplate what that meant, a loud shout originated from the front door. "I'm home!" Misato shouted with a resounding cheer. "And I brought a guest!" She proudly dragged Doctor Akagi into the kitchen like a cat displaying its kill.

"Welcome back, Misato. Hello, Doctor Akagi." Leader and Shiki glared at Doctor Akagi for a moment before promptly ignoring her. The twitch of her eye was missed by nobody.

"Hello, Shinji," Doctor Akagi said with enough repressed annoyance to rival a retail worker. "And please, call me Ritsuko when I'm off the clock."

"Alright….. Ritsuko. Will you be joining us for dinner?"

"It's what I was invited for. I was also hoping for some beer…."

"Fine, one!" Misato groaned. "Only one, though. I'm still annoyed at you for the taser."

"I was just ensuring the safety of our pilot. It wouldn't be beneficial for anyone to have him constantly visit the ER because of your cooking."

"Everyone's a critic," Misato grumbled while she grabbed two beers. "So Shinji, how was school?"

"Fine. Kensuke got into an argument with the teacher about the exact specifications of the armored vehicles used during the Impact Wars. Also, I get the feeling I'm being watched."

"I heard Section Two is trying out some new equipment - perhaps it's that?" Ritsuko supplied, slowly nursing her beer, contrasting Misato's chug, slam, and shout approach.

"Maybe that's it. I can't imagine what else it would be."

"Mmmm. Anyway, how are you settling in, Shinji? No trouble aside from your brush with the biohazard known as Misato's cooking, or that brush with organized crime?"

Misato glared at her for a moment before returning to her beer. "No, everything has been fine, Ritsuko."

"I see, and you've certainly been a help around here. How bad was it when you first got here?"

Misato's glare returned in full force. She was about to retort before Shinji beat her to it. "Terrible," he said while repressing a shudder. "Like a tornado ripped through and trashed everything." He began setting the table.

"I get no respect, none at all….." Misato grumbled. She had gotten another beer when nobody was looking and chugged it down.

"Oh, Shinji, before I forget, could you do me a favor?" Ritsuko asked.

"Sure? What is it?"

"Rei just got her ID card renewed, but needs it delivered. Could you do that for me?"

"Oh, uh, sure. Where does she live?" Shinji had an odd feeling in the pit of his stomach that something about this would go wrong, but he didn't want to refuse the request. It would be rude to not help his fellow pilot. He didn't notice that Leader and Shiki shared an odd look.

"It's on the card." She handed him the ID - the image of Rei looking as impassive as she looked in real life, perhaps even more so. "Just be careful. Her apartment isn't in the….. best part of town."

"That doesn't sound like a place for a Pilot or a young girl in general to live, Rits." Misato eyed her friend suspiciously.

Ritsuko shrugged in response. "Assigning quarters isn't part of my job. That's the Housing Department's job."

"NERV has a Housing Department?" Shinji questioned.

"NERV has a lot of things that we probably shouldn't be wasting an operating budget on, but that's the Accounting Department's problem, not mine."

Misato laughed at that but Shinji didn't get the joke. A comfortable silence soon enveloped them as they ate, leaving Shinji to his thoughts of tomorrow and his arrival at his mysterious fellow Pilot's home.

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Shinji blinked as he read the address again, making sure he was at the right place. Seeing that it was correct, he could only stare at the building in front of him. To call it dilapidated would be an understatement, the building looked like it was one errant breeze away from falling over. Leader and Shiki shared his concerns if the flabbergasted looks of disbelief on their faces was anything to go by. They started whispering to one another about something as he approached the building, noticing the Section Two agents positioned around the entrance giving him a once over before returning their attention elsewhere.

"Anta Baka," Shiki whispered, and despite not knowing what she said, he had a feeling he would agree with it. Stepping over large chunks of stone debris and around a switchblade-wielding raccoon, he arrived at Ayanami's door. The mail slot was stuffed to the brim with old mail that seemed to be composed entirely of advertisements and bills, overflowing onto the ground like a fountain of paper. He hesitantly knocked on the door only for it to slightly open at his touch, it having seemingly been unlocked. He looked at Leader and Shiki, who returned his look with unreadable expressions. He gently opened the door and poked his head inside.

"Ayanami? Are you there? M-may I come in?"

He received no answer, so he cautiously entered the apartment, trusting Leader and Shiki to alert him if something was wrong. The apartment was small and dirty, almost spartan if one were to discount the large number of papers plastered to the wall with words like 'prank ideas' and 'vengeance' boldly written upon them. His eyes darted over to the nightstand beside the bed, which held two books (those being 'The Beginner's Guide to Pranking' and 'The Count of Monte Cristo') and a pair of vaguely familiar glasses.

Before he could contemplate any of this, he heard a door open behind him. "Ayanami? Is that-" He was interrupted by Leader and Shiki slapping their hands over his eyes in an impressive display of speed. "Baka!" The intention behind the words was clear - don't look. He wondered what they didn't want him to see.

"Pilot Ikari, why are you in my home?" Ayanami's voice inquired from behind him.

"I'm, uh, here to deliver your new ID card?"

"I see, thank you for coming all this way. May I have it?"

"Uh, sure." He fumbled around blindly in his pocket before he managed to wrench it out of his pocket and held it out behind him awkwardly. He was relieved when it was lifted from his grasp.

"I am told it is common etiquette to offer tea to guests, but I have none to offer, nor do I have time to make it as I am required to head to the Geofront to do a test. Please allow me to correct this egregious faux pas when next you visit." He got the sense that Ayanami was bowing apologetically.

"It's no trouble, Ayanami. I-I think I need to go too, so I could join you?"

"This is agreeable. Please wait while I obtain clothes."

Wait what? 'Obtain clothes' would imply…..

"Ayanami…. Are…are you in your underwear r-right now?" Shinji realized the stupidity of asking that question the moment he said it as he felt the glares of Leader and Shiki boring holes into the sides of his head.

"No, I am not in my underwear right now." Oh, that was good, he was worried he walked into- "I am not wearing any clothes at all." She said that with such detachment that he had to take a moment to process it before he began sputtering uncontrollably. He started pressing himself against where he remembered the wall was and began to inch towards the door while repeatedly muttering apologies. He burst out of the apartment and deeply breathed in the slightly acrid air of the complex.

"Leader, Shiki?" They removed their hands from his eyes, seeing that he was safely away from the epicenter of the incident and stared at him curiously. "Next time we see Doctor Akagi, do something that will inconvenience her for sending me here." Shiki smirked in bemusement while stifling a chuckle as Leader just laughed uproariously.



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To say the walk with Ayanami to the Geofront was awkward would be like saying fire is warm, an extreme understatement. Shinji was far too embarrassed by the incident to say anything while Rei was far too apathetic to initiate conversation, leading to an uncomfortably silent walk to the Geofront. As they began to descend into the Geofront proper, Shinji managed to muster up the courage to say something.

"So Ayanami…" he began, realizing that he didn't think ahead enough to continue that sentence, so he blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "How long have you been a Pilot?"

"All my life," she stated and proceeded to not elaborate in any way, shape, or form.

"Ah, well, do you have any tips for piloting?" he tried, hoping to get some actual advice to improve his chances of not getting pseudo/actual impaled again.

"Don't die."

"O-oh, I was hoping for something more than that…"

"Pilot Ikari, you are the one who has sortied twice while my Evangelion has been frozen in Bakelite. Logically, I should be the one asking you for advice."

Shinji had to admit there were no flaws in that reasoning. "W-would you like some advice then?" He didn't have much to give, but if it would help Ayanami then-

"No." Her dry refusal shattered any indication that the conversation would be going forward. Leader and Shiki began patting his shoulders placatingly as if to say 'you did well'. It really didn't make him feel better.

Thankfully, the now awkward silence was broken. However, it was broken by the two Pilot's phones warning them about an incoming Angel. Shinji really couldn't catch a break today.

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Misato stared at the camera feed of the giant crystalline Angel floating about Tokyo-3 with an analytic eye. What challenges would this Angel bring? How would it fight? Why was it an octahedron? Would it look good as a mascot? All these thoughts and more bounced around in her head as Unit-01 was being prepped for launch.

"Any thoughts, Captain?" Ritsuko asked as she read through the stream of incoming data regarding their newest foe.

"Is it made out of actual crystal? If we shot it with a laser beam, would it split into more lasers?"

Ritsuko stared at her for a moment with slight incredulity. "The fact I know you're absolutely serious about that question frightens me. You realize we don't have any laser-based weaponry, right?"

"We don't? Huh, I thought we did. Well, in that case-"

"New contact detected! Approaching from Sector-9-Y-5!" Hyuga's announcement got everyone's attention. "Bringing it up on scene 12 now!" Attention was quickly directed to the aforementioned scene to reveal…. Unit-01?

"Oh, you have got to be kidding me." Ritsuko immediately recognized what it was. "What are they doing with the 1:1 Unit-01 Decoy Balloon?"

Misato shot her a confused look. "The what?"

Any explanation Ritsuko could give died in her throat as an energy buildup in the Angel was detected.

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The Fifth Angel, Ramiel, was in its objectively factual opinion, perfect. How could it not be when it had taken such a geometrically perfect shape. Honestly, it pitied the imperfect, non-geometrical Lilim. Extincting them would be doing them a favor with all the pain they were undoubtedly in by not being geometrical. So it was drilling away through these pesky armor layers to rejoin with Father and bring perfection to this world.

Ramiel paused in its drilling as it noticed something approaching with its omnidirectional vision. A large figure made of polyurethane and filled with helium slowly approached with obvious menacing intent. Was…..was this supposed to be a threat? Or was this a trap crafted by the Lilim? With their Fruit of Knowledge, the Lilim possessed guile and ingenuity beyond what even the craftiest Child of Adam could bring to bear.

Should Ramiel destroy this potential foe and possibly spring a trap, or leave it be and risk a greater attack upon itself? Ramiel thought for a moment and decided that if it was a trap it could weather whatever attack the Lilim could levy against it. It shifted its geometrical form and screamed.



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The Command Bridge was silent as the Angel's form shifted and unleashed a beam that annihilated the Unit-01 Decoy Balloon, before shifting back to its octahedral form and resuming its drilling. The silence resumed for a moment longer before Misato spoke up.

"I feel we should abort the launch of Unit-01." She spoke evenly as she eyed the image of the Angel, a thousand plans running through her head on how to defeat it.

"I agree with Captain Katsuragi," a voice intoned from the pinnacle of the Command Center. The Commander was analyzing the Angel with a cold gaze, studying it like a butcher studies livestock coming in to be slaughtered and dressed. "It is too risky to engage the Angel conventionally. Find an alternative method to fell our foe. Contact me once you have finalized a plan."

"Yes, sir!" Misato intoned as the Commander and Sub-Commander left the Command Center. She turned to Ritsuko with a severe look. "How ready is Unit-00 for deployment?"

"If it doesn't go berserk, I'd say it would be fairly ready for deployment. Why?" She then noticed a familiar look in her friend's eyes. "…..You already have a plan, don't you?"

"Kinda. We may have to piss off the JSSDF."

"I'm not hearing a problem yet."

"The problem is we may have to use some unfinished prototype that may or may not actually exist based on a rumor I heard when listening to the complaints of a JSSDF toady."

"Well, you've certainly had worse bases for plans before-"

"Also we need to hijack Japan's entire supply of electricity."

"What?" There was the problem she had to deal with. Ritsuko sighed as she idly wondered if Ooi still had that bottle of vodka hidden away at her station.

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"I'm going to what?" Shinji was trying to wrap his head around what Misato was trying to explain to him, with little success.

"You're going to use an experimental Positron Cannon powered by the entire power supply of Japan to snipe the core of the Angel while Rei protects you from its death beam with a shield made from a space shuttle."

Misato explained this to him as if it wasn't pure insanity. Then again he'd spent the last month and change surrounded by eight-inch tall redheads so perhaps he shouldn't judge.

"Alright. Question, how do I snipe?"

"Good question, Shinji. You let the MAGI handle all the complex targeting stuff. Just aim accordingly and pull the trigger, just like using the Pallet Gun." That was good, he could do that. "Just be sure to kill it with the first shot, because there's a thirty to forty second recharge time and you wouldn't want to be attacked by that thing while you're recharging."

He… really didn't have a response for that. "So, when is the operation beginning?"

"Midnight - now let's get to the mountain."

Shinji would question where a mountain fit into the plan but he decided that it was probably not a necessary question. As Misato drifted up the mountain to the staging area, he wondered what the Minisuka's plans were this time. Whatever they were, he knew they would have his back, and he hoped they knew he had theirs. A rare feeling swelled in his chest, the feeling of confidence, a feeling that this battle would go well. Now if only those feelings weren't being pushed back by the feeling of terror Misato's driving was giving him.

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Rei stepped across the outdoor walkway at a sedate pace, Unit-00's looming figure eclipsing the trees surrounding it as she walked to the entry plug. Her conversation with Pilot Ikari about bonds left her thoughts in slight disarray, but she would push down any unnecessary thoughts in order to focus on her mission.

She paused as she spotted a familiar presence perched atop her Evangelion's shoulder like a gargoyle, looking down upon her like a hawk eyes a scurrying mouse. "Hmph. Anta Baka?" the Ishim scoffed as her black cloak billowed in the night wind. Rei narrowed her eyes as she recognized her nemesis, now bedecked with a top hat, monocle, and jet black cloak. This was the Prankster Ishim she would obtain vengeance upon, no doubt here to gloat.

"So you have come, my nemesis." Rei's voice possessed the faintest hint of annoyance in it as she spoke. "I have come to a sudden realization. I have previously stated to Pilot Ikari that I could be replaced if I die, but I have seen the error in my judgment. Dying before I obtain my vengeance would be meaningless, so I will say this to you. I will survive so I may enact my revenge upon you. This is a promise, my nemesis."

The Ishim sneered disdainfully at Rei for a moment before shaking her head and shrugging while chuckling. "Baka," she announced with a flourish, before grabbing a miniature hang glider and jumping off the Evangelion's shoulder, flying away while cackling madly….. only for an errant gust of wind to blow her off course and cause her to crash land right in front of Rei. Rei blinked, unsure of what to do in this situation. Thankfully, the Prankster got up and dusted herself off as if nothing happened, before grabbing the glider and launching herself off the walkway with another cackle, flying down the mountain without care. Silence followed as Rei stared at her nemesis's retreating form.

"Truly a worthy foe," she uttered with utter sincerity, taking a moment to respect her enemy before she entered her Entry Plug and waited for the operation to begin.

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"Alright, Operation Yashima will begin shortly. Distraction artillery?" Misato called out.

"Primed and ready, Captain!"

"Energy collection?"

"Slightly above predicted levels, Captain!"

"Evangelions?"

"Ready, Misato!" Shinji called out. Rei merely pinged back an affirmation signal.

"Alright, beginning Operation in three, two, on-"

"New contacts approaching!" Hyuga called out.

"Are you kidding me!?" Doctor Akagi screamed in frustration, bringing up the visual feed on the new contacts. They came into view, showing a hover of RC helicopters each manned by a small squad of Minisukas, with a vaguely familiar tune about flag waving playing in the distance.

Misato, more or less used to this by now, shook off the shock rather quickly. "Begin the Operation! Fire the distraction artillery!"

The command was given, and a rain of fire and steel was thrown at the Angel, which retaliated with judicious application of death laser. The Minisukas used the cover of the artillery to get in close and pelt the Angel with their lances, forcing it to go on the defensive. This allowed Unit-01 the chance to gain a target lock on the Angel's core.

"Center the target, pull the trigger."

A lance of light emerged from the Positron Rifle, piercing through Ramiel's red core, causing the Angel to freeze. For a moment, everyone let out a sigh of relief until the Angel once again let loose a horrendous scream of geometry and pain.

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Pain. Hurt. Rage. Incandescent Rage. Ramiel was angry. Angry at the Lilim for hurting it and angry at itself for thinking that the distant energy buildup was another distraction meant to draw its attention away. No matter, it would return the pain a hundredfold. It shifted its form once more, preparing to let loose a blast of energy that would gouge a hole into this insignificant landmass the Lilim called an island. It was ready to blast the petulant Lilim away when it felt something smack against its core. It pointed its omnidirectional vision towards its core in confusion, only to find an unusually small creature wearing a long black piece of fabric. The creature blinked at Ramiel and if Ramiel had the proper physical characteristics, it would have surely blinked back. The creature then manifested a is that the Lance ofPAINPAINPAINPAINPAINPAIN. Ramiel's core writhed in pain, shaking the creature off, and before it could collect itself, a second lance of light struck its core, and Ramiel knew no more.



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Prankster luckily managed to break her fall with an awning, and thankfully was not crushed when the Angel's body hit the ground with a thud. She dusted herself off idly as she surveyed the area. If anyone asked, she planned that. She absolutely didn't lose control of her glider and get thrown directly into the core of the Angel by an errant gust of wind. Anybody who suggested that was just jealous of her skills. Now, she just needed to figure out a way down to ground level that didn't involve a painful fall.

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A familiar feeling washed over Kaworu Nagisa as he lay in his bed - another of his siblings was felled. He let out a small sigh as his mind drifted into slumber. His Fruit of Knowledge was partial, incomplete, so he did not dream as the other Lilim did. Instead, he gazed upon fragments of other worlds where other versions of him lived, a strange ability he possessed as the Angel of Free Will. The visions these fragments granted were always muddled and confusing, but they clearly showed the times spent with a lonely boy that possessed a beautiful soul. Kaworu wished he could make this boy happy, but from what these glimpses into parallel worlds showed him, it would always end in tragedy. Still, a moment of joy for the boy would be enough.

"H̸o̷W̵ ̵c̶A̴n̶ ̶Y̶o̴U̸ ̵s̴E̶e̷ ̴S̴o̸ ̴M̷u̴C̶h̴ ̴Y̴e̴T̴ ̷s̴T̴i̴L̴l̷ ̸B̴e̴ ̷B̴l̷I̶n̷D̴ ̶t̵O̵ ̶t̵H̷e̶ ̴T̵r̷U̷t̵H̵?̷"

Kaworu felt a ball of ice form in the pit of his stomach as he turned to look at the owner of the voice. The entity was humanoid in shape but formed of the darkest shadows, with two glowing purple circles where the eyes would be. An instinct within him denied this thing existed, but it was here in his dreams.

"Who-"

The words died in his throat as the entity's hand facsimile wrapped around it. "S̴i̴L̴e̶N̷c̴E̷.̷ ̴m̶Y̶ ̴t̶I̶m̵E̴ ̴i̶S̸ ̶s̶H̴o̶R̷t̵."̷" It appraised him momentarily before continuing. "S̴t̶A̴y̸ ̷A̸w̴A̶y̵ ̶F̴r̴O̷m̶ ̵T̷h̶E̸ ̸p̵I̸l̷O̴t̸S̴ ̵u̶N̴t̶I̴l̴L̴ ̸t̵H̶e̷ ̵S̶i̵X̶t̶E̸e̴N̶t̷H̸ ̵i̵S̸ ̸f̴E̶l̴L̴e̶D̸,̷ ̷s̶O̷ ̸t̸H̴e̴ ̴E̶n̶D̴ ̶m̴A̷y̸ ̴C̸o̵M̶e̷ ̸W̸i̴T̷h̵O̷u̵T̷ ̶i̸S̴s̸U̵e̷."

"What are you talking about?!" Kaworu stared into the entity's eyes and froze at what he saw. It noticed and a malicious grin swiftly formed onto the shadowy unflesh of its face.

"W̶h̷A̶t̶ ̶I̶'̶m̸ ̶T̶a̷L̸k̸I̴n̷G̷ ̸a̷B̵o̸U̵t̵ ̸T̶a̷B̸r̴I̵s̵…̸.̸"

"I̷s̵ ̷T̸h̵E̴ ̸e̵N̷d̷ ̷O̷f̷ ̶T̴h̷E̶ ̵c̵Y̶c̷L̷e̶.̷"

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End of Rise of the Minisukas Act 1: Miniscule Menace

Stay tuned for Act 2: Red Tsun Over Paradise

Notes:
Author's Note from Fanfiction.net | "Damn that took awhile. Action scenes are the bane of my existence, but I feel this one came out decently. I didn't include the scene where Shinji asked Rei why she piloted because I don't feel I could have changed it in any meaningful or funny way, but it did still happen, just picture Leader and Shiki doing something Minisukaesque during it. So yes, Prankster is dressed like an old-timey villain that ties people to train tracks, did you expect anything else from Rei's great nemesis? Wonder who that shadow guy is? Probably somebody not important to the plot or related to any other spooky happenings I'm sure. Anyway, with this the first act is done, and our heroes will next have to face... Jet Alone. Well, Act 2 is certainly starting off big. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy. Leave a review if you want, and have a pleasant day."

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Notes from Me:
Now that we've gotten through Part 1 (and are up to Chapter 15 on the author's sites), I would like to hear from SW Forum folks on whether or not to continue releasing this here. Like many printed chapter stories, I've noticed that it follows a familiar pattern by starting with a certain number of views, gets about half that number with chapter 2, about half that with chapter 3, etc., so that after ten chapters, the story is getting only about 3 dozen views. I am especially concerned that there has been not one comment on it yet! Is it entertaining? Are the illustrations that I'm providing add to the fun or are they distracting? Are the non-Evangelion fans able to keep up? Please let me know!

[Enigma12]

Honestly I don’t know the lack of views, honestly I read all to this point after you post this chapter. It’s pretty good. Just didn’t know that the author had released more chapter yet.

[jeffrey-dallas]

Honestly I don’t know the lack of views, honestly I read all to this point after you post this chapter. It’s pretty good. Just didn’t know that the author had released more chapter yet.

Thanks for the reply! I just want to be assured that people are indeed reading so the time I spend proofreading, finding illustrations, and the like is worth it. I also admit that while the story is filled with a generous abundance of handholdable redheaded Teutonic tsundere waifus, there's not exactly the typical type of SW action you would see in an SW story (as of now, anyway). Perhaps comments to the author will provide us some of those desired sequences (Shinji/Minisuka shipping? Bad guys capturing some Minisukas for inspection/peril, etc.?)...

[littlest-lily]

I can commiserate on wondering sometimes if I'm more of a bother if I post my writing! And then every once in a while someone will come out of lurking to DM me or something and it'll remind me that there are plenty of people quietly reading (and I never used to post comments myself so I totally get it). It can be hard to remember that the number of views represent real people but I'm sure there are plenty of folks who are enjoying what you share. As long as you're enjoying writing it I'd say keep going

I honestly am not a big Evangelion fan so I haven't been keeping up only because of that - from what I have read your writing is good! But I thought I'd give my 2 cents if it can help. I know that I always struggle keeping up with stories when each chapter is posted as a separate thread on a forum. If I see a part 8 or something I might think "oh, I've started reading this but... which part did I leave off of again?..." and the extra digging can be a deterrent - plus with so many threads it gets harder finding specific stories in general. Just speaking from my experience though!

[jeffrey-dallas]

I can commiserate on wondering sometimes if I'm more of a bother if I post my writing! And then every once in a while someone will come out of lurking to DM me or something and it'll remind me that there are plenty of people quietly reading (and I never used to post comments myself so I totally get it). It can be hard to remember that the number of views represent real people but I'm sure there are plenty of folks who are enjoying what you share. As long as you're enjoying writing it I'd say keep going

Just to clarify - I am not the author of this story. The writing comes from the mind of "Blackunknown", who posts it on fanfiction.net and Archive Of Our Own. I received permission to post it here on the SW Forum. All I do is some proofreading and adding the illustrations (just to make it more fun and maybe help non-Evangelion fans visualize things). But the comments are still appreciated. If you want to go to those websites and drop notes and/or suggestions directly to "Blackunknown", links are at the top of each chapter.

I'm certainly enjoying the story as each chapter arrives, and not just because of SW Asukas. "Blackunknown" is doing a fine job maintaining a tightrope between a serious story and a parody fanfic. It also drops in the occasional reference to other shows and movies if you can spot them (Monty Python, etc.). Anyway, I've started to work on proofing chapter 11, so we'll see how this goes -- the 1:1 scale Macrosuka will soon be in town!

I honestly am not a big Evangelion fan so I haven't been keeping up only because of that - from what I have read your writing is good! But I thought I'd give my 2 cents if it can help. I know that I always struggle keeping up with stories when each chapter is posted as a separate thread on a forum. If I see a part 8 or something I might think "oh, I've started reading this but... which part did I leave off of again?..." and the extra digging can be a deterrent - plus with so many threads it gets harder finding specific stories in general. Just speaking from my experience though!

Each chapter gets a separate posting, so they should be easy to spot, but still -- the previous chapters:

Chapter 1: https://shrunken-women-board.com/phpBB3 ... f=9&t=4268
Chapter 2: https://shrunken-women-board.com/phpBB3 ... f=9&t=4281
Chapter 3: https://shrunken-women-board.com/phpBB3 ... f=9&t=4284
Chapter 4: https://shrunken-women-board.com/phpBB3 ... f=9&t=4305
Chapter 5: https://shrunken-women-board.com/phpBB3 ... f=9&t=4308
Chapter 6: https://shrunken-women-board.com/phpBB3 ... f=9&t=4317
Chapter 7: https://shrunken-women-board.com/phpBB3 ... f=9&t=4332
Chapter 8: https://shrunken-women-board.com/phpBB3 ... f=9&t=4336
Chapter 9: https://shrunken-women-board.com/phpBB3 ... f=9&t=4345
Chapter 10: https://shrunken-women-board.com/phpBB3 ... f=9&t=4375

[littlest-lily]

Just to clarify - I am not the author of this story. The writing comes from the mind of "Blackunknown", who posts it on fanfiction.net and Archive Of Our Own. I received permission to post it here on the SW Forum.

Ohhhh my mistake! Totally missed that!

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-08-21
Words: 3,358

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?


Act 2: Red Tsun Over Paradise

Chapter 11: Jet Alone Act 1: Next Time It’s Personal

Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)


"-and while the damage to the city's defensive armaments is quite substantial, the Evangelions themselves suffered no damage during the fight." Gendo stared at the committee as they absorbed the report. While all of them, save Chairman Lorenz, took the guise of featureless monoliths, he understood them enough to be able to intuit their reactions and expressions, even devoid of sound.

"This is excellent news. This is the perfect opportunity to reduce the conventional defense budget now that the JSSDF has seen how useless normal weapons are against the Angels," SEELE-11 stated, surprisingly quickly from what Gendo knew of him. SEELE-11 was always the budgetary backbone of the old men, always circumventing Gendo's attempts to divert more resources to NERV and Tokyo-3. Now he sounded… panicked? Disturbed? Unnerved? Curious, the old men shouldn't have noticed Adam was missing yet, and his sources didn't mention anything out of the ordinary.

"I would advise not to reduce it too much," Gendo added quickly. "The defenses, no matter how useless, keep the population happy. A happy population is a content population, content means they are less likely to ask unnecessary questions, less unnecessary questions lead to fewer problems to the Scenario."

"….Ikari has a point," SEELE-6 came to his side after mulling his reasoning over. "Keeping the population unaware is cheaper and less time intensive than hiring 'cleaners' to deal with people who ask about things they shouldn't."

"…..Reduce it, but leave enough to fool anyone looking close enough," Lorenz spoke, and the decision was made. "We need to deal with the more important issue at hand. Ikari, what of the Ishim?"

Ah, that was the real problem for them. "Their help in defeating the Fifth was invaluable. Without them, the Evas would have undoubtedly received heavy damage, and they distracted the Angel enough to allow for the killing blow to be dealt." He was genuinely thankful to them, as there was no telling what damage Unit-01, Yui, would have taken if they sent her out against the Angel. Oh, and Shinji.

"We have some concerns regarding that," the Chairman intoned grimly. "Does it seem a touch convenient that they deployed the decoy balloon-"

"Still can't believe that there's a 1:1 scale decoy balloon," SEELE-10 muttered.

"-right before the Eva would have been deployed? Almost like they knew it would happen."

"Are you suggesting the Ishim possess foreknowledge of events to come?"

"Are you saying you haven't considered the possibility of such, Ikari?"

He had, in fact, considered it, and he had come to the conclusion that no amount of foreknowledge would be a threat to him. He had counters prepared in case of any wayward time travelers, no matter who they were. Well, except for Aoba. That man was a wildcard, but too useful to get rid of.

"I have considered it and I have found it to be irrelevant."

The old men grew silent at that, eying him suspiciously. "Care to explain your reasoning for that, Ikari?" SEELE-6 broke the silence, just as Gendo expected.

"My reasoning is that no matter what foreknowledge they possess, it pales in comparison to our foreknowledge. We possess the Dead Sea Scrolls, which have detailed to us the method by which Complementation will be achieved. Not to mention we have connections, money-" Hmm, they grew nervous when he said that. Investigate later. "-and contingencies decades in the making. Whatever they can do, we can do better."

There, reassuring their near blind faith in the Scrolls, stroke their egos regarding their power, and make them believe he's not holding a knife ready to stab them in the back. Now to direct their attention away from the Ishim - his current revised plans would be hard to accomplish with the old men's eyes on Tokyo-3 more than they already were.

"For instance, the C-Type equipment we developed to ensure the upcoming fight with the Sixth would be successful. Proof of our foreknowledge and time to use it." There, that should be sufficient for-

"I thought it was the B-Type that was made for underwater combat?" SEELE-3 questioned.

"…..No, the C-Type is the equipment specifically developed for underwater combat."

Gendo did not have a good feeling all of a sudden.

"Oh. Well. That's a problem." One could hear SEELE-3 audibly sweating.

"How is it a problem?" Chairman Lorenz's tone had a dangerous edge that promised many things that were not conducive to continued health.

"Unit-02 was sent out to sea without underwater fighting gear. To be ambushed by the Sixth, the Lord of the Sea, Gaghiel."

The entire room was silent, everyone staring at SEELE-3 with a disbelieving glare.

"Ikari." Lorenz turned to look at him. "Fix this."



The committee's projections suddenly disappeared, leaving Gendo alone with Fuyutsuki.

"I wonder how they will react when they read the rest of the report and find that the Fifth Angel's likeness was purchased from under our noses by an entertainment company and is being used as a virtual idol on a streaming platform." Fuyutsuki mused aloud.

Gendo merely counted down in his head until-

"Ikari! What the hell is this!?"

The old men reappeared and Lorenz angrily held out a page with 'Crystal Laser Idol Ramy L.' emblazoned on it, along with the image of the octahedral form of the Fifth wearing a frilly dress.

"I'm sorry, gentlemen-" Gendo smirked underneath his bridged hands. "-But I have to deal with the Unit-02 situation as you ordered. Anything regarding the Idol situation is fully outlined in the report. Good day."

He cut the connection as he left the meeting room. They would try to make him pay for that later, but he was following urgent orders to ensure their success against the Sixth, and as long as he succeeded, they would hold their tongues for a while. And it was worth it, just for the look on Lorenz's face.


("Superfusion!" art by CuKO)*

------------------------------------------------------------

The men of SEELE were not happy. This wasn't because of Gendo or his actions, not entirely at least, but because of the fact that this situation happened to begin with. Due to a sudden lack of Gendo to direct their anger against, they settled for the individual who made the mess to begin with.

"What the hell, Three!?" SEELE-5 roared. "You oversee logistics, how could you screw this up?!"

"How the hell am I supposed to differentiate between all the Eva equipment's purposes?! They're literally just labeled with letters, letters that don't correlate to what the equipment does!"

"Enough!" Keel had enough, this bickering only served to waste his time. "We can deal with the issue regarding the equipment and the fifth's idolification-" Keel couldn't believe that was something he had to seriously say.

"How could an octahedron look so good in a dress?" someone muttered and he chose to not acknowledge the words were even spoken.

"-and instead address the issue of one of our bank accounts being suddenly and inexplicably drained. Seven?"

"Whoever they are, they're good. No trace, multiple proxies, and dozens of false positives. I'll continue looking but we may as well count that money lost for good." That was not the news Keel, or any of them, wanted to hear.

"Hmph, Eleven? How does this affect our plans?"

"Quite a bit. We'll have to consolidate the construction of the Eva series. We can say goodbye to having twelve fully functional Mass Production Evangelion by the new year. At most, we'll have nine if we're smart about budgeting."

"Not great, but nine should be plenty as long as the S2 engines and the Dummy Plugs work as intended. As for the issue of the Ishim, and no Nine, we are not assassinating the Second Child." SEELE-9 bit back the words forming in his throat before they could be vocalized. "….For once I believe Ikari, the Ishim are no threat to the Scenario even with foreknowledge of events to come. As we surpass them in that, and even more. But that does not mean we should be lax."

"What do you mean, Chairman?" SEELE-12 inquired.

"While they are no threat, we shouldn't be complacent in regards to the Ishim. I do not doubt that Ikari is developing his own countermeasures for them, and we should do the same. Contact our agents and have them begin work on collecting…. samples for study. Discreetly so as not to arouse Ikari's suspicions." A chorus of affirmations rang out and Keel let a smirk grow on his face. The Scenario will not be impeded.



------------------------------------------------------------

"Excuse me, are you Shinji Ikari?"

Shinji blinked as he turned around to see who addressed him. A girl in glasses with long brown hair stared at him, a slightly manic look in her eyes.

"Yes, I am. How can I help you?" Shinji realized he's seen this girl around before, she was the one who he caught looking at him. She'd always bolt off before he could ask why she was staring at him. He hoped he wasn't making her uncomfortable when he looked at her while she stared at him.

"Hello, my name is Mayumi Yamagishi, Class 2-B." She bowed slightly. "I'm sorry if this is a bit forward, but do the small redheaded girls you've tamed propagate their kind by transmorphing other girls into them?"

A retort about how he didn't tame them died in his throat as the rest of the sentence caught up with him. He blinked as he tried to comprehend the question being asked of him. A quick glance at Leader and Shiki on the floor nearby showed they were just as confused as he was, perhaps even more so.

"I….. don't understand?"

That was evidently not the answer she was looking for. "Look, I don't want to be a redhead! Being eight inches tall is fine, but having red hair will bring too much attention! What if my classmates start asking me for fashion advice?! What if they try to induct me into their girl talk cult?! What if Nene starts hanging out with me and tries to get me to talk with the ghost inside her teddy bear?!"

"Wait, what was that last-"

"I just want a quiet, peaceful life, Mister Ikari! And I can't have that if I have to understand fashion trends and listen to boy bands!"

What the heck was she talking about? Was this some kind of girl code? Leader and Shiki were at a similar loss for words, so it was up to him to deal with this. "Y-you'll be fine, Miss Yamagishi! You won't turn into a Minisuka."

Her eyes seemed to focus on him, desperation pouring from her every movement. "Really? You aren't lying?"

"N-no?" He really hoped he wasn't, at least.

"Oh! Great!" Her attitude did a complete one-eighty, the maddened aura that seemed to possess her evaporating like steam. "Sorry to have bothered you, Mister Ikari. Have a nice day." She bowed and walked off as if nothing happened.

"Well." He spoke as his brain was trying to catch up to what had happened. "That was a, uhhhhhhh….." He offered a hand to Leader and Shiki, which they used to climb back onto his shoulders. "An interesting reason to get ambushed outside the bathroom for?" He stared at the wall for a moment longer before he decided to get back to lunch before it ended.

"Anta Baka?" Shiki questioned, while Leader was pointedly looking away.

"I don't know, but I'm sure she was just worried about something." He paused for a moment. "She…. isn't going to turn into a Minisuka, right?"

They stared at him with a look that screamed 'are you serious?'

"Of course not. I was just checking."



Things have been quiet since the fight with the Fifth, and things promised to stay quiet for a while longer. In a week or two, they would be meeting the Second Child onboard the flotilla carrying Unit-02, and Misato assured him that she would break the silence through sheer presence alone and to look forward to that. Speaking of Misato, she was apparently going with Doctor Akagi to see a demonstration for an Evangelion competitor called the Red Alone or something. Hopefully, nothing would go wrong with that-

Shinji's musings were broken by his NERV phone ringing, telling him he was needed in his capacity as a Pilot. He groaned silently and started jogging towards the school gate, where Section Two would undoubtedly be waiting for him. One day, Shinji would learn not to tempt fate, but that was not today.

------------------------------------------------------------

Earlier that day.

Misato hated a lot of things right now. She hated having to go to this stupid demonstration. She hated how all these corporate bigwigs were treating Ritsuko and her like pariahs for trying to save the world. But most of all, she hated how the bar here had cut her off after four drinks. If she was going to suffer through this farce, she wanted to at least be buzzed.

"Look at all of them, Misato. Vultures, the lot of them. They're just after our UN grant money. They don't care about anything else. I'd be surprised if this 'Jet Alone' could even register as a threat to an Angel."

Honestly, Ritsuko was taking it better than she thought. Still, her friend looked like she was ready to strangle someone. Perhaps it was good that the three of them were seated alone at their own table, as she didn't want to hold back her friend when she went to assault someone.

"Anta Baka." Oh, right. She almost forgot their surprise guest. Apparently, a Minisuka stowed away in her pocket when she wasn't looking. But she wasn't complaining, misery loves company, after all. Also, she found the tiny lab coat this Professor Minisuka wore to be just adorable.

"Ugh, don't get me started. I mean, what are they even going to do about the A.T. Field? Honestly, a single one of you little gremlins is more a threat to an Angel than the Jet Alone will ever be." Misato was surprised nobody questioned the presence of an eight-inch tall redhead, but again that probably has to do with everyone else treating them like lepers and staying away from the NERV table. Maybe she should have brought Shinji along? That way they could've been ignorant of all the scientific mumbo jumbo together.

"Oh, they're starting, finally. Let's get this farce over with," Misato grumbled, eager to leave and return to her beloved Yebisu beer and forget this stupid event ever happened.

A man in a suit walked up to the stage, to call his grin smug would be an understatement. "Hello, ladies and gentlemen, I am Shiro Tokita. Thank you for coming to the unveiling of Japan Heavy Chemical Industries' Jet Alone Project, the next step in the defense of humanity!" As if prompted, everyone other than those at the NERV table began clapping. "As you know, the Jet Alone Project seeks to produce a reliable defense against the alien menace without needing to rely on a shadowy international organization that uses hormonal teenagers to pilot skyscraper-sized death machines." Tokita shot a condescending grin at the NERV table while everyone else laughed at the 'joke'. Then his face contorted into a pained grimace as he suddenly grasped his knee. "Ah, my knee!" Misato blinked as she heard a nearly silent 'thwip' coming from her table. She looked to Professor, who was grasping her lance as if she just caught it, a single drop of blood dripping from its point.

"Baka," Professor huffed out, glancing at Misato. Misato made a zipping motion across her mouth, indicating she wouldn't tell. Ritsuko wasn't even paying attention. Instead, she was attempting to develop the ability to spontaneously combust people with her thoughts alone. Unfortunately, it looked like she had yet to succeed.

"Apologies, but without further delay, let's get started with the demonstration of the Jet Alone Kai!"

The screen behind Tokita flashed alive with the image of a large orange mech wielding a very large hammer.


(Jet Alone Kai art by Ikuto Yamashita)

"Kai?" Misato muttered in confusion.

"Kai?" Ritsuko matched her befuddlement.

"Baka?" Professor seemed more surprised and concerned than confused.

The three of them weren't alone - all around the room Misato could hear confusion from the rest of the peanut gallery.

"That's right!" Tokita continued on with the predatory demeanor of a loan shark. "Due to recent technological breakthroughs and multiple threats from OSHA, we at JHCI decided to retrofit the original Jet Alone project into something better. I will now open the floor to questions." Tokita scanned the room before he found an outstretched hand. "Yes, Doctor Akagi?"

"Yes, I have a few questions, some of which I believe are shared by everyone in the room. For example, could you elaborate on how this Kai variant differs from the original Jet Alone?"

"An excellent question! The Kai not only possesses a greatly improved structure, but we've also replaced its nuclear reactor with a much more efficient and safer N2 reactor!" Huh, guess they aren't complete idiots if they decided to get rid of the nuclear reactor. However, the fact they had a nuclear reactor in the first place was beyond stupid. "In addition, we also equipped the Kai with a prototype self-learning intelligent algorithm, controllable from an easy to transport case such as this..."

A presumably unpaid intern wheeled out a large computer console of a size comparable to a minivan's dashboard and put it next to Tokita. If that's considered 'easy to transport', Misato would hate to see what they thought was 'somewhat cumbersome'.

"An AI? Interesting. But how are you dealing with the most important issue, the A.T. Field?" Ah Ritsuko, going for the killing blow as usual.

"Ah yes, the 'A.T. Field'. The supposed soul magic barrier the aliens possess that the Evas can also use. You may have fooled the UN with that nonsense, but I will not be!"

What? "Nonsense? There is literally proof of the A.T. Field! Conventional weaponry has been proven to be ineffective!"

"If your supposed 'A.T. Field' really does exist, then it's only a matter of time before an artificial A.T. Field is created." Tokita chuckled. "This is the beginning of your downfall, NERV-"

All of a sudden, the console next to him lit up. "ORDERS ACKNOWLEDGED. INITIATING ANNIHILATION OF NERV DOWN TO EVERY LAST MAN, WOMAN, AND CHILD. NO SURVIVORS, NO MERCY."

The entire room was dead silent, their eyes glued to the console.

"….W-what?" Tokita managed to stammer out. His response was the sudden shaking of the room as the Jet Alone Kai began to move, taking a small chunk of its dock with it. As the Jet Alone Kai began walking off in the direction of Tokyo-3, Tokita felt the eyes of everyone in the room on him. He had only one thing to say in this situation - "Oh shit, OSHA's going to kill me."


Notes:
"And we're back with Act 2. As we can see the normal Jet Alone situation has been changed, and the Jet Alone Kai has taken the stage with its hammer. The Jet Alone Kai originates from the game Neon Genesis Evangelion 2, in which if you save the original Jet Alone from exploding the Jet Alone Kai appears in the MPE battle and just beats the Eva-series with a hammer. Also, Mayumi mentioned a Nene Matsukaze, who is another extracanonical character from Neon Genesis Evangelion Gaiden, where she is a redhead with a teddy bear that she proclaims is possessed by a spirit named Sandy-san. That's it, that's her character, or at least that's all I could find of her character. Anyway, we'll get into the meat of the Jet Alone Kai fight next time. Until then, I hope you all enjoy, leave a review if you want, and have a pleasant day."

Note from me:
* The "humanized Ramiel" art is actually a combination of Ramiel and a character from Touhou Project named Reiuji Utsuho. The picture was just too good not to use.

[Enigma12]

Ok, nearly bust a gut laughing at parts of this. SEELE have no idea just how screwed they’re about to be, aren’t they?

[jeffrey-dallas]

R.I.P.: Motomu Kiyokawa (voice actor for Kozo Fuyutsuki):
https://www.animenewsnetwork.com/news/2 ... ay/.188873

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-08-21
Words: 4,051

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?


Chapter 12: Jet Alone Act 2: Non-Nuclear Boogaloo

Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)


The flash of rainbow indicated Unit-01's start-up process beginning, and soon Shinji's senses were one with the Eva's. "So, I have to stop this Red Alone thing?" he questioned.

"Jet Alone, and yes," Miss Ibuki confirmed. In the absence of Shinji's father, the Sub-Commander, Misato, and Doctor Akagi, Ibuki was put in command, edging out all the other bridge crew in rank due to being Doctor Akagi's personal second in command. "It apparently suffered some sort of logic corruption or fell victim to some malicious code. It has designated its mission to annihilate NERV and is denying any shutdown protocols. As such Shinji, your primary mission is to disable it before it can damage Tokyo-3."

"Sounds simple enough. Anything I should know about it?" This honestly sounded easier than fighting an Angel, but he had a feeling it would probably go wrong in some way, shape, or form.

"It appears to lack any ranged weaponry, so as long as you stay out of reach of its hammer, you should be fine," Mister Hyuga provided. "We're setting Ayanami up with a sniper so she can provide ranged support if necessary, but the both of you should be careful. The Jet Alone apparently has a Non-Nuclear reactor, and the last thing anybody wants is for it to go critical."

Non-Nuclear? Like the N2 mine they dropped on the Third Angel? Shinji absolutely did not want to get stuck in a blast like that, even in an Evangelion. "So be mindful of its hammer and make sure it doesn't explode. Got it. Any recommendations on how to beat it?"

"Just stall it out. The Captain and Doctor Akagi are working to shut it down, so as long as you keep your power cable from getting destroyed, you should be able to outlast it." Oh good, Misato was on the case. Hopefully, she wasn't going to climb into it or anything. "Just be careful. This is the absolute edge of our coverage zone, so this will be the only power station for miles."

"Understood, Mister Hyuga."

Leader and Shiki were whispering to each other about something behind his seat, probably about the upcoming fight. Or maybe about the weird stuff that Yamagishi girl was talking about. He hoped she was okay - she looked pretty stressed.

"We're launching in five, Shinji. Get ready."

He gave a small grunt of affirmation to Miss Ibuki as his mind pushed the topic of Yamagishi to the back of his mental list. As Unit-01 was being loaded onto the launch catapult, he briefly wondered if Misato's and Doctor Akagi's part was going well.


(Maya Ibuki cosplay by Minh-P)

-------------------------------------------------------------

"What do you mean you can't get the shutdown codes?!" Misato's part of this mission was not going well. The coding in the Kai was giving Ritsuko and Professor trouble enough that Professor looked like she actively wanted to murder someone, and now Tokita couldn't get the damn shutdown codes!

"Look, I'm trying! Apparently, the CEO is in a golf match and doesn't want to be disturbed and his damned secretary doesn't understand that this is a literal life or death situation!" Tokita sighed despondently. "I'm ruined. My project is ruined and people are going to crucify me if the Kai actually kills anybody." He slumped over, before springing back up. "Well, if my life is ruined beyond repair, I might as well raid the bar and get blackout drunk. Any of you want anything?"

"Well, actually-" Misato pulled the brake on her automatic affirmation hard. She'd drink when this whole situation was done and dusted. "No, I have a giant robot to stop." Tokita shrugged and hopped over the bar's counter. "Alright, where are we at, Rits?"

"I want to both congratulate and shoot whoever made this code. It's adapting to whatever we can throw at it faster than we can crack it. At this point, I'd say we need an expert or the MAGI to stop this thing."

Professor screamed something that might have been a curse if anyone understood what she said.

"And we have neither right now. What options do we have? Could I, I don't know, climb into its internals and smash up its processor or something?"

"You make it sound way easier than it is. First of all-"

Whatever she was about to say was cut off as the doors to the presentation hall burst open and a small red RC car drove towards them. It drifted to a stop as its driver got out, a Minisuka wearing a black leather jacket with the words 'Hacker Girl' emblazoned on the back in neon red lettering and a pair of aviators covering her eyes. "Anta Baka." The Hacker Minisuka gave them all finger guns as she walked towards the Jet Alone console.

Everyone just stared at her with morbid fascination.

"Fuck it," Ritsuko blurted out. "This is still not the stupidest thing I've seen all month. Let's go, you little gremlins." Well, she took that better than expected.

"I just took a sip of brandy - how am I already hallucinating?!" Tokita looked aghast at the sudden appearance of the Minisuka.

"Did you not notice the other tiny redhead who was here the entire time?"

"I was performing damage control and trying to get the shutdown codes - get off my back!"

Alright, fair. Hopefully, this Hacker would help push their efforts through, 'cause she sure as hell didn't want to get inside an N2-powered mech. Hopefully, Shinji and Rei can buy them the time they need.


(Shiro Tokita)

-------------------------------------------------------------

The light of the sun seared into his (the Eva's?) retinas for a moment before he began adjusting to the outside light. He moved over to the pylon and quickly attached the cable. Seeing the timer stop going down, he turned his attention to the horizon and spotted the approaching silhouette of the Jet Alone Kai.

"Wow, that is a large hammer." Shinji couldn't help but stare at the massive bludgeoning implement. He really didn't want to get hit by that.

"Wonder if we can claim it as battlefield salvage?" he heard Mister Aoba muse.

Miss Ibuki was quick to quash that idea. "We could just produce our own hammers! We don't need to loot one from a malfunctioning mech!"

Shinji tuned out their bickering and focused on the approaching Jet Alone. It stopped a decent distance away from him and just stared at him.

"EVANGELION UNIT DETECTED." Oh, it talked. "LIKELIHOOD OF BEING PILOTED BY HORMONAL TEENAGER WITH POOR JUDGEMENT SKILLS AND A BEVY OF PSYCHOLOGICAL ISSUES: ONE HUNDRED PERCENT."

"Wow, rude," he muttered under his breath. Leader and Shiki glared at it from their perch on his shoulders.

"TARGETING WEAKNESS, INITIATING." What? "ATTENTION, EVANGELION PILOT. YOUR MOTHER NEVER LOVED YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE A FAILURE AS A BALLERINA."

Without even realizing it, Shinji had willed Unit-01 forward and delivered a quick right jab to the Jet Alone's face facsimile. "OW!" It clutched its pseudo-face with its free hand. "WHY WAS I PROGRAMMED WITH THE ABILITY TO FEEL PAIN!? THIS SEEMS LIKE A CRITICAL DESIGN FLAW!"

"Your existence is a critical design flaw," Shinji growled out, he then blinked in surprise. Where did that come from? Leader and Shiki stared at him in open shock - even the Jet Alone was taken aback. Wait, did he activate the speakers?

"WOW, HURTFUL."

"Oh, sorry! I don't know what came over me!"

"NO, IT'S FINE. I SHOULD'VE BEEN PREPARED TO TAKE IT IF I WAS GOING TO DISH IT OUT. NOW I'M GOING TO REVERT TO MY ORIGINAL PLAN."

"Original plan?" He instinctively ducked under a wide hammer swing that was aiming for his head. "Oh."

"INITIATING PROTOCOL: HAMMER. TIME TO DIE, NERV SCUM!"

Alright, this was something he was used to. He dodged out of the way of the heavy hammer strikes, each one coming progressively closer to hitting him.

"Shinji?"

He sidestepped an overhead strike. "Yes, Miss Ibuki?" He ducked under a sweeping strike only to get sent flying backward by a sucker punch.

"Perhaps you should use your A.T. Field?"

Oh. Right. He quickly projected his A.T. Field just in time to intercept a strike that would have turned the Eva's head into pulp.

"AN A.T. FIELD? MERELY SMOKE AND MIRRORS."

"It, uh, just blocked your attack?"

"FALSE. A.T. FIELDS ARE A LIE CREATED TO SUPPRESS THE WORKING CLASS." What? "YOUR PARLOR TRICKS HAVE NO EFFECT ON ME. NOW DIE." The hammer once again bounced off his A.T. Field. "CEASE YOUR TRICKERY AND FIGHT FAIR! I WILL NOT BE DEFEATED BY A LIE PROPAGATED BY REPTOIDS!"

What? "Miss Ibuki, what is the Jet Alone talking about?"

"Ignore it and keep doing what you're doing. Rei is in position and ready to provide support if need be. We just need to wait for Major Katsuragi and Senpai to do whatever they're doing to stop that thing."

Oh, good. Hopefully, they wouldn't take too long.


(Evangelion A.T. Field Propaganda Art by unnie)

-------------------------------------------------------------

"This is taking too long! Where the hell did you get this code, Tokita?!" Ritsuko turned to the now buzzed man who was watching this hacking going on with rapt fascination. "You need something like a MAGI to get code like this, and I doubt your company has something like that lying around!"

"My project overseer." Tokita put his bottle down as he began to recall. "He gave me the data and told me a 'friend' of his whipped it up for us. Said the CEO gave it the go-ahead, and I confirmed that part as true at least. Had my code monkeys comb it for anything suspicious and it came back squeaky clean."

"So you used unknown code as a basis for controlling what amounts to a bipedal superweapon?!"

"I really didn't want to, honest! I wanted it to be fully remote controlled, but my overseer twisted my arm by threatening budget cuts."

"Enough bickering! Where are we at, Rits?"

"The gremlins and I are slowly chipping away at the defensive precepts and anti-tampering protocols, but quite frankly, we need some help, preferably from Shinji. Perhaps if enough damage was dealt to the Kai by the Evas and it needed to divert resources to damage control, we'd be able to slip in."

"Yeah, and best do that before it activatesh its self-destruct shequence," Tokita added with a slight slur in his voice.

"Yes, exactly, before it activates excuse me you wanna run that by me again?!" The glare Ritsuko sent Tokita's way could probably have pierced through an A.T. Field.

Tokita blinked owlishly. "Oh right, I didn't get to that parsh of the presentashion because things went tits up. Right sho, it hash a shelf-destruct sequence in case it was damaged beyond repair and it was close enough to do shome damage to whatever disabled it."

"So, what you're saying is that the Jet Alone Kai, which is rampaging uncontrolled near Tokyo-3, is effectively a walking N2 Bomb?" Misato did not like where this was going.

"More like three-quarters of an N2 bomb."

"Why do you think that matters?!" Ritsuko nearly screamed before sighing and turning to Misato. "Misato, call command and tell them to get Shinji to cripple the Kai so we can slip into its programming."

"On it, Rits." She was already pulling out her phone. The Minisukas appeared to be arguing about something. Hopefully, something that could get them out of this mess.

-------------------------------------------------------------

The Jet Alone Kai stared at Unit-01. No doubt if it had the ability to use facial expressions, it would be showing an expression of pure annoyance. Shinji, who fully possessed those abilities, was showing an expression of annoyance.

"LOOK, I AM SAYING YOU SHOULD PUT DOWN YOUR NON-EXISTENT A.T. FIELD SO WE CAN TALK THIS OUT LIKE REASONABLE PEOPLE."

"I'm not falling for that again. You're just going to try to hit me with your hammer once I put the field down." His side was still sore from that glancing blow, and his cheeks still hurt from the pinching Leader and Shiki gave him for falling for that.

"THAT WAS A MOMENT OF TEMPORARY INSANITY. I CAN ASSURE YOU I ONLY HAVE THE PUREST OF INTENTIONS THIS TIME."

"The answer is still no."

"DAMMIT! YOU ARE SMARTER THAN THE AVERAGE TEENAGER, WHOEVER YOU ARE."

"….How dumb do you think teenagers are?" Shinji was genuinely curious as to where the Jet Alone was getting its frame of reference for all the nonsense it was spouting.

"Shinji," Miss Ibuki called out. "We just got a call from Captain Katsuragi. We need you to damage it so the hacking can proceed."

He wasn't sure how that worked, but that was something he could do. He quickly dropped his A.T. Field and decked the Jet Alone in its face facsimile, hopefully disorienting it as he tried to kick out its knee. Unfortunately, the Jet Alone recovered faster than he anticipated and backstepped quickly out of the attack.

"FOOL, YOU CANNOT DISCOMBOBULATE ME FOR I HAVE NOT THE WEAKNESSES OF FLESH!" A distant crack was heard and suddenly the Jet Alone's hammer swung at something. A small flash came from the hammer's head and Shinji saw a now flattened truck-sized bullet clang to the ground some ways away. "THAT ALSO INCLUDES A FAR SUPERIOR REACTION TIME. JET ALONE KAI: ONE; NERV: ZERO."

Oh. This might actually be a challenge.

"What about the A.T. Field? I think with that we're even." Shinji grabbed the Progressive Knife from his shoulder pylon and got into the stance he learned in the combat training.

"I DO NOT COUNT THINGS THAT DO NOT EXIST. ALSO, BRINGING A KNIFE TO A HAMMER FIGHT? REALLY?"

Ayanami spoke up for the first time in the operation. "Pilot Ikari, if you can keep its attention on you, I will be able to damage it without it being able to intercept my shots."

"Understood, Ayanami, I'll try." He just had to think of a way to do it. He could defend himself with the A.T. Field but had to drop it when he attacked. Combined with the fact that the Jet Alone was probably a better fighter, he needed to plan this smart. He lunged forward and tried to feint, but it was seen through quickly as the Jet Alone matched his lunge and hit him in the gut with the pommel of the hammer. The sympathetic pain causes him to reel backward, which the Jet Alone capitalized on to throw a lariat against him, knocking him to the ground. At this point Shinji's head was spinning, his brain struggling to catch up to the current time.

"THIS IS WHY THE JET ALONE WILL ALWAYS BE SUPERIOR TO THE INFERIOR EVANGELIONS. I SHALL NOW PUT YOU OUT OF YOUR MISERY, NERV SCUM. ANY LAST WORDS?" The Jet Alone raised its hammer high, ready to smash Unit-01's head into pulp.

Realizing that he had lost his knife at some point, Shinji thought as fast as his disoriented mind would allow and enacted the first plan he could imagine. "Look!" He pointed somewhere behind the Jet Alone. "A distraction!" Nobody said it was a good plan.

"WHAT?! WHERE?!" The Jet Alone turned around, to everyone's surprise. "… WAIT."

This moment of distraction allowed Shinji to act. Unit-01 sprang up and latched its hand on the Jet Alone's hammer and wrenched it from its grip.

"HEY! THAT'S MY HAMMER!"

"I can't believe that worked," he muttered in disbelief.

"Anta Baka?" Leader and Shiki said in unison, sharing his disbelief.

"GIVE ME BACK MY WEAPON SO I MAY DESTROY YOU!"

Shinji was not inclined to do so. He was inclined, however, to use said weapon against his foe. He swung a few times at the Jet Alone, missing all but one hit, managing to get a glancing blow on its chest, catching it off balance. A distant crack was heard before the Jet Alone's left knee exploded in a shower of circuitry and metal.

"OW! WHY AM I NOT ALLOWED TO TURN OFF MY ABILITY TO FEEL PAIN?! WHAT PURPOSE DOES THIS FUNCTION EVEN SERVE!?"

"Excellent work, Pilot Ikari. Your plan was most effective."

Shinji was glad he had all the video feeds turned off, so nobody could see how embarrassed he was due to his 'plan'.

"SO YOU THINK YOURSELF THE VICTOR DUE TO MY CRIPPLING." Oh good, a distraction from his embarrassment. "BUT IT IS I WHO SHALL HAVE THE LAST LAUGH! INITIATING SELF-DESTRUCT SEQUENCE! BURN IN NON-NUCLEAR HELLFIRE, NERV SCUM! PLAYING 3. HA HA HA HA HA HA."

"That doesn't sound good. Miss Ibuki, what should I do?"

"First of all, Shinji, don't panic."

"Alright, I'm not panicking." That was a lie, he was already panicking.

"Shinji, I have a readout of your heart rate. I can tell you're panicking."

Well, that's a lesson to never lie when inside the entry plug. "Sorry…"

"It's fine, Shinji. Try to project your A.T. Field around the Jet Alone. You should be able to contain the blast. Most of it, anyway."

"Most of it? What about what isn't contained?" His comms were uncomfortably silent as he projected the A.T. Field over the Jet Alone.

"It will probably hurt. A lot. Sorry, Shinji."

Well, at least she sounded sorry. Now he waited for the inevitable blast. And waited. And waited some more.

"Uh, Miss Ibuki, is it supposed to take this long?"

"Oh, sorry, Shinji. We got a call from Captain Katsuragi. They managed to remotely shut down the Jet Alone Kai!"

"That's great!" Shinji let his A.T. Field down as the Jet Alone stayed silent. He waited a moment before an important question came to mind. "Can I keep the hammer?" He smiled sheepishly as he heard the bridge crew begin laughing.



-------------------------------------------------------------

Ritsuko sighed as she fell into one of the presentation room's errant chairs. They had narrowly managed to push through their jury-rigged shutdown code through the damage suppression protocol and the self-destruct activation. As much as she hated to admit it, she wouldn't have succeeded without the help of those little gremlins. However, something was off about the Professor one, as her face was now contorted into a visage of hatred and fury that Ritsuko had only ever seen in the artwork of mythological monsters. Did she recognize something about the code? Well, no use trying to pry it out of her.

Tokita collapsed behind the bar after pulling what she referred to as Katsuragi Maneuver Six, drinking enough hard liquor to knock yourself out. But he managed to grant them permission to all the bar's contents after their victory, something Misato was taking advantage of by stuffing a makeshift sack made out of a tablecloth with all the liquor she could carry.

Her thoughts went to the code they had to fight tooth and nail against. It was way too advanced for it to have been created by some corporate code monkeys. This was done by a genius, possibly mad, in the field of coding. If she knew who this person was, she'd convince Gendo to find and hire them, but alas she had no idea of this coder's identity. Except for one clue - a signature in the code.

"'Envy', huh? Odd name."

-------------------------------------------------------------

A few days later.

General Yoshida Taihou walked through the halls of Japan Heavy Chemical Industries, now significantly less filled. The Jet Alone Incident had tanked the company's reputation to a massive degree and was now hemorrhaging employees and investors to a massive degree. Now it was ripe for the picking, and his superiors had given him a healthy budget to buy everything regarding the Jet Alone to add to his personal brainchild, the T-RIDEN-T Project. With how much trouble the Kai reportedly gave the Eva Unit, it would be a massive boon to his program.

Soon enough, he was at his destination, the office of Shiro Tokita, the effective owner of JHCI, after everyone else above him jumped ship after pinning the blame of the Jet Alone Incident on him.

General Taihou walked into the office to find Tokita asleep at his desk, snoring away like a woodchipper. General Taihou loudly cleared his throat and Tokita shot up. "I told you it's not my fault!" He blinked, taking in his surroundings before noticing the General. "Oh. Apologies. I haven't been getting much sleep lately, General….."

"Taihou. Mister Tokita, allow me to extend my apologies for the misfortune that has befallen you and your company."

"Misfortune is a generous way of saying being blamed for your superior's screw-ups and being blacklisted by the rest of the mech industry." That was actually his doing. The best offer was one that appeared to be the only option after all. "So how can I help you, General Taihou?"

"I have come with an offer from the JSSDF to purchase JHCI, along with any assets pertaining to the Jet Alone. As well as offering you a job, if you'd like. We've found your work to be worth investing in for the future of Japan."

Tokita stared at him blankly, no doubt seeing that he was only here for the Jet Alone. But with JHCI as it was now, there was no way he could refuse this offer.

"An interesting offer, General. One that I would be more than willing to take-" Of course, it's not like he had any other option to- "It's a shame I'm going to have to refuse."

"What? Why?!"

"Because as of-" Tokita looked at his watch. "-two hours ago, Japan Heavy Chemical Industries was bought out. We are now the robotics and mecha division of Kyoto Zeppelin Industries."

"A company that makes Zeppelins?"

"Pachinko machines actually, and formerly at that. Offered an absurdly generous sum and offered me a position as head of mech development. Which I took."

"You… you sold the rights and data for a multi-billion yen mech to a pachinko company?!"

"Former pachinko company. And yes."

General Taihou was speechless. How could he lose this golden opportunity to a godsdamn pachinko manufacturer?! "Get into contact with your CEO! I want to negotiate!"

"I have no way to contact them. I was dealing with an intermediary. You'd have better luck looking through a phone book. Now if you don't mind, General, I have important work to do."

Tokita grabbed a pillow from under his desk and once more fell asleep. The General was about to loudly awaken him before he realized the futility of this course of action. He left the office and returned to his car. He took a deep breath and picked up his cell phone and dialed the number of one of his agents.

"It's me. Dig up everything possible on Kyoto Zeppelin Industries, the dirtier the better. Also, begin to set Operation Honeytrap into effect, ASAP."

He hung up and began driving back to base - there was work to do.



-------------------------------------------------------------

In the middle of the Indian Ocean, at the same time.

Asuka paused her Segatendo Dual Gear and narrowed her eyes suspiciously.

"Why do I feel like strangling a redhead right now?"

She pondered the odd thought a moment before filling it away in the low-priority queue of her thoughts to ponder. She returned to her game about rolling giant eggs as she contemplated the meeting between her and the 'vaunted' Third Child that was soon to come.


Notes:
"Have I mentioned I dread action scenes yet? Because I do. Hopefully, this one is easy to comprehend. So yes, Hacker is here and she's pure 90s hacker energy. Anyway, I wonder who this Envy person is, and why Professor is angry? Very important questions, but the answer to the most important question is Yes, Shinji did get to keep the hammer. As for General Yoshida Taihou, he is not an extracanonical character, he is an OC because I couldn't find any Evangelion media where a JSSDF General was given a name. But to keep him as in line with the source material as possible, his surname is shared with the name of the Japanese aircraft carrier the Taihou. In any case, I hope you all enjoy, leave a review if you can, and have a pleasant day."

[Enigma12]

Welp looks like those little gremlins won’t stop causing trouble and bought out an entire pachinko company to cause margarines on their enemies, Shinji keeps the hammer, and Asuka is about to be in for quite the shock.

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-08-21
Words: 3,711

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?


Chapter 13: Over the Rainbow, Under the Tsun

Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)


"I really owe you big for this, Ikari." If Kensuke wasn't buckled in, there would be no doubt that he would be bouncing around the passenger chamber of the VTOL. "I mean, visiting a U.N. transport fleet? It's like Christmas and my birthday fused together into some sort of abomination designed to be the best day ever! What's next? Are you going to tell me I'm an Eva pilot?!"

"Hold your horses, kid." Misato chuckled at the boy's excitement. "This isn't all fun and games. We're here to make an important delivery to ensure the rest of the trip goes without incident, so try not to have too much fun." Despite the seriousness of her words, Misato's tone had a jovial tinge to them.

"Incident? Like a monster fight?! Score!"

"Wait, that's not what-"

"Don't bother, Miss Misato," Touji interrupted. "Ken's just gonna find another reason ta be excited. Best quit while yer ahead." Misato closed her mouth and nodded, rolling her eyes in mock exasperation. "But seriously, Ikari, thanks fer this. Sakura has been houndin' me to take a break and stop visiting her. Now I got a chance ta do that, and as a bonus get away from all the little Red Demons runnin' around. Seriously Ikari, how'd ya manage with them I'll never know."

Leader gave Touji the stink eye for that while Shiki just continued to nap away in Shinji's shirt pocket.

"It's really not a problem, Touji. They help me as much as I help them."

Leader blushed as she grumbled something and Shiki moved her hat down to cover more of her face.

Misato smiled to herself as she idly wondered if the real Asuka would be like this when she and Shinji met. She also wondered how she would react to the Minisukas, or how the Minisukas would react to her. Now that she thought about it, she perhaps shouldn't have brought them to meet Asuka. Perhaps she should have thought of this before they were a quarter of the way there. Well, she was sure everything will work out fine. She tuned out the kids's conversation and watched the scenery go by.

"-so imagine my surprise when I heard they were taken down by some guy with a sword and, and I quote, 'the ability to double jump'."

"How the heck does somebody double jump?" Touji wondered aloud.

Kensuke shrugged in return. "Not sure - the only thing I could catch about that was something about a jetstream. But in any case, I managed to get myself an authentic World War Two era Russian artillery piece. Before it got stolen by the Triads." Kensuke muttered something potentially unflattering as Shinji tuned him out, once again kicking himself for not bringing his SDAT to pass the time.

"Anta Baka?" Leader muttered to herself, seemingly pondering something. Shinji contemplated striking up a conversation with her before realizing that wouldn't work in the slightest. As his options dwindled, he noticed something sticking out from under his seat. He reached down and picked it up, revealing a thick tome of a book titled 'The Bible'. As he had nothing better to do, he opened it up to an earmarked page and began skimming through the text. After a few minutes of this, he sighed and returned the book where he found it - the words within were far too archaic for him to understand. The most he understood was about a wall falling with little effort. He soon joined Misato in watching the scenery go by, missing a knowing smirk on Leader's face.

--------------------------------------------------------------


(Asuka Langley Soryu cosplay by Kayz Orbeam)

Asuka stared at the incoming VTOL with a look of annoyance and smug superiority. Soon the vaunted Third Child would be before her, and she could prove herself as the superior Eva Pilot once and for all. She absolutely wasn't taking out her frustrations because her attempts to seduce Kaji were thoroughly stonewalled because his door had a lock and she just had to ship her crowbar in her second set of luggage.

Well, it didn't matter - she had all the time in the world for that. Now she had to put some undoubtedly cocky idiot in his place. The VTOL landed on the deck, depositing its cargo as one familiar woman emerged along with a trio of unfamiliar boys. Great, she had to deal with three stooges instead of one.

The wind blew the taller one's hat off in her direction. Being the generous person she was, she stopped the hat from going overboard by giving it a hearty stomp. "Well, Misato, it's been awhile-" She stopped when she noticed two red specks rushing at her across the flight deck. Before she could understand what was going on, two miniature versions of herself halted in front of her and one boosted the other in the air in order to grab onto the front of her dress. "What the hell?!" Suddenly, a gust of wind blew past, causing her dress to flutter in the breeze. This would have certainly given everyone in front of her quite a view if it wasn't for the mini-me weighing the fabric down. The mini-me grabbing her dress let go and dropped to the floor before giving the other, who Asuka now noticed had an eyepatch and a pretty cute hat, a high-five.

"Huh," Misato breathed out. "That was different."

The mini-mes walked back over to the trio, now duo because the one with the glasses wandered off at some point, and climbed on the wimpy-looking boy with a puzzled look on his face. The tall one was pointing at her, his face frozen in shock.

Asuka, her mind working to comprehend the scene before her, had only one response to this. "Misato! What the actual fuck is this?!" Asuka pointed to the mini-mes and by extension, the boy they had roosted upon.

"That's Shinji Ikari, the Third Child, and two of the Minisukas, Leader and Shiki," Misato explained, as if it were the simplest thing in the world.

"The what?"

"The Minisukas. You know, like Mini Asukas."

Asuka slowly blinked. She looked at the 'Minisukas' with a critical eye, her mind glossing over the fact that the wimpy, weirdly familiar boy was the Third Child. One looked just like her whenever she wore a plug suit; the other had an eyepatch over her left eye, a cute hat, and lighter hair.

"Wait, you said 'two of'."

"Oh, yeah! Plenty more where they came from, just you wait when we get back to Tokyo-3."

Asuka stared at Misato with an intensity to rival that of an N2 explosion. Deciding that dealing with Misato was too much of a hassle at the moment, she directed her attention to the now identified Third Child. She also noticed that the tall one had fled at some point, no doubt intimidated by her grand presence.

"So you're the Third Child?" She looked him up and down, unable to shake off the weird sense of having seen him somewhere before. He was scrawny, plain, and looked like someone who would flee at the first sign of trouble. A small part of her mind did think he was the tiniest bit cute before that part of her mind was beaten and thrown into a mental oubliette for crimes against the dominant Kaji faction. "I'm Asuka Langley Soryu. Charmed, I'm sure."

"Uh, S-Shinji Ikari. Nice to meet you. Well, a you that's not, well…. you know….." He gestured to the mini-mes on his shoulders, who were staring at her quizzically.

"Right. Anyway, I'm sure you're all pleased up on your high horse, lording your three Angel kills upon the rest of us. But now that I'm here, you can kiss that supremacy goodbye because you're an idiot if you think-"

He interrupted her tirade suddenly. "You're not saying it right."

Asuka stared at him in confusion. "What?" She didn't like being interrupted, but if her Japanese wasn't correct, she wanted to fix it now and not embarrass herself later.

"You didn't call me an idiot correctly," he stated in the same way one corrects someone else's crossword puzzle.

She stared at him incredulously, the mini-mes and Misato shared her confusion.

"Baka?" the non-eyepatched mini-me (Leader, she thought) inquired.

"Yeah, like that," the Third explained, hitting her with another wave of confusion.

"But…. that's what I said...." At least she hoped she did. She may have slipped into German at some point.

"No, you called me an idiot. You're supposed to call me an idiot." He paused for a moment. "I can't say it right. They can, however." He pointed to the mini-mes, who were just absolutely confuddled about the situation.

Asuka turned to Misato, trying to get some sanity into this situation. "Misato, I was speaking Japanese, right? I called him an idiot the same way the mini-me did, right?"

"Yes... Shinji, are you feeling alright?" Misato started looking concerned.

"I'm fine, Misato. It's just…. I don't know how to explain it."

"Alright…." Misato eyed him warily. "How about we put a pin in this conversation until later. I have to talk to the Captain."

"Sure. Sorry for delaying you," the Third muttered dejectedly.

Wow, he folded quickly. Misato must have housebroken him. Hopefully, she didn't use her cooking to do it - she wouldn't wish that on her worst enemy. Well, except her father. He could shove a bucketload of Misato's cooking down his rotten gullet.

"It's alright, just grab your friends before that Kensuke kid steals a fighter jet or something," Misato replied.

Well, this was not the introduction she expected, but it was… honestly, just confusing. Still, at least the Third Child wasn't some total douche. Also, he was a bit cute, the small part of her mind stated once more as it tried to claw its way out of the oubliette before being kicked back down.

--------------------------------------------------------------

"No."

"What do you mean no?!" Misato looked like she wanted to strangle the Captain.

"It is my duty to get this cargo to its destination safely. I am not handing over leadership until my work is done."

Misato looked like she wanted to argue more, but decided that it was probably meaningless. "Fine. Can you at least sign this form stating that the power cable and Sonic Glaive were received?"

"Fine. Kids today and their Sonic Glaives. Whatever happened to good ol' fashioned superior firepower?"

"It became obsolete when the giant aliens started using soul-based forcefields," Misato retorted dryly.

"I see your dry wit is still as sharp as ever, Katsuragi," a voice rang out from the bridge's doorway.

Shinji turned to see a scruffy-looking man with a grin on his face that one might describe as roguish.

"Kaji!/Baka!" Two voices rang out as Asuka and Leader ran over to the man. The man, to his credit, only looked slightly surprised to see an eight-inch girl charge over to him and hug his ankle. Shiki rolled her eye at the display.

"Hey, kiddo, and…. smaller kiddo? Uh, I'm afraid you've caught me a bit off guard here."

Leader stared him in the eyes for a moment, gave another quick squeeze of his ankle, then summoned her lance and stabbed him in the shin. Kaji yelped in pain as Leader huffed and climbed back on Shinji.

Touji winced in sympathy as Misato and the Captain snickered before glaring at each other. Kensuke had elected to distance himself from whatever was happening again and struck up a conversation with one of the bridge crew, asking them about their role and duties.

"Hey!" Asuka shouted, enraged that Leader had stabbed Kaji. "What the hell was that for?!"

"Anta Baka," Leader stated in a way that clearly meant 'he knows what he did' and sat once more upon Shinji's head.

"Kaji," the Captain intoned. "I told you never to set foot on my bridge again."

"My apologies, Captain." Kaji winced as he shifted the weight off his newly aerated foot. "I just wanted to see my old friend Katsurag-"

"Captain," Misato interrupted. "May I have permission to use Ryoji Kaji as a practice target for a firearms test during my stay aboard your fleet?"

"Permission granted. Now all of you get off my bridge."

Kaji stared at Misato blankly as a wide grin started to form on her face. "I'll give you a head start." Misato unholstered her sidearm and gave it a once over. "So you better make it count."

Shinji would proclaim until his dying day that he had never seen a man hobble as fast as Ryoji Kaji did that day.

--------------------------------------------------------------


(Asuka Langley Soryu cosplay by Ming Tao)

"So where are we going?" Shinji asked as he held on for dear life. Traversing across the waves on a small boat was not his idea of a good time, considering he never learned to swim. Learn floral arrangement instead of taking swimming lessons, he said. At what point would swimming ever become relevant?, he asked. Shinji wished he could punch Past Shinji in the mouth right now.

"You'll see when we get there, Third!" Asuka shouted over the roar of the boat's engine.

Shiki was rubbing the back of his neck comfortingly - she probably thought he had seasickness. Leader was writing something down in a little notebook, concentrating on the horizon. He really hoped an Angel didn't attack now, or if one did, the Angel was one that would transport him to a place where he wasn't in danger of drowning. Eventually, they reached their destination and Shinji was once again on land - or a larger, more stable boat as it were.

After following Asuka for a while longer, he found himself in a large open area with a tarp covering a strange Evangelion-shaped lump. He contemplated the lump for a moment longer before concluding that it was probably an Evangelion. Or another Evangelion-shaped balloon.

"Behold, Third!" Asuka threw off the tarp with a flourish. "Eva Unit-02! The world's first Production Model Evangelion!"

Production model? Were they mass producing them now?

"It's… a nice shade of red-"

"Damn right it is!"

"But why does it have four eyes?" Asuka stared at him blankly in utter silence. "It's weird now that I think about it. Unit-00 has one eye, Unit-01 has two eyes, and Unit-02 has four. Are they doubling the eye amount with every Unit? Is Unit-03 going to have eight eyes?"

"Third, what in Gott's name are you talking about?" Leader and Shiki were also staring at him, bafflement on their faces.

"I'm not sure, it's just something I noticed. I figured you might have an idea since you're an Evangelion expert."

Asuka smiled at him after he said that. Shinji had to conclude that, like the Minisukas, she had a nice smile. "Well, since you're so uninformed about even the most basic facts, I guess I could educate you on-" A distant explosion caused the boat to rock. "Gott in Himmel what now!?"

They rushed outside to see what was happening. They immediately saw a giant bloody cross towering above the fleet, standing in place of what was once a ship. Shiki looked at Leader with an 'I told you so' look. Leader grumbled in response.

"Is it an Angel attack?! Oh no, Asuka, we have to get back to Misato!" Shinji turned to Asuka, who was sporting a massive smile as she stared at the cross. She let out a single word that sent a shiver down Shinji's spine.

"Wunderbar."

Shinji suddenly felt he made a mistake coming here.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Kyoko Zeppelin Soryu was not a very active woman. This was due in part to her being a soul contained within a skyscraper-sized biomechanical death machine. As such, she had a lot of free time to devote to her passions that weren't related to watching her beloved daughter or doing battle with her best frenemy Yui - science. Unfortunately, after a literal decade stuck in Unit-02's core, she had made very little headway in anything science-related due to not having the ability to test her hypothesis. She had to find another passion. Namely, writing fantasy novels.

"Hmmmm, what would be the average gut size of an ogre that is five months pregnant?" Unfortunately, her time as a scientist left her a touch too focused on details. "I think I'll need the big calipers for this." Fortunately for the sanity of everyone involved, Kyoko noticed someone entering the entry plug.

"Oh, Asuka!" She went over to the barrier separating her daughter from her and stared at her. "What are you…. Oh? Is that a friend I see?" Her daughter brought someone into Unit-02's entry plug? She must trust them very much! Kyoko was so glad her daughter was making friends! And it was a boy, too! "Ohohoh Asuka, my little pride and joy, who are you putting the moves on…. wait, is that…." She stared at the boy, analyzing him (politely ignoring the female plugsuit he was wearing) and coming to a realization.

"Little Shinji!? Yui's boy!? My word, he's gotten so big! I remember when he was just a little baby whose adorable little cheeks I would pinch~" Kyoko giggled manically. "He looks so much like his mother. You could just put him in a dress and-"

Kyoko blinked as she noticed two other presences in the entry plug. She stared at the two eight-inch tall versions of her daughter on Little Shinji's shoulders. "What?" As a scientist, Kyoko believed in rational explanations for things, so surely there was a rational explanation for them, right? She noticed that both of them had interface headsets on, so she thought to skim a little of their thoughts to get a clue about-

[{deservedtodiewe'llfindyouabetteryouthinkyoucanatoneforwhatyoudidyou'remerelyafalse}]

Kyoko gasped as she felt the metaphysical tears fall down her face. She needed to go to them. She needed to hug them and say everything was alright. The hand on her shoulder reassured her that-

She paused. Hand on her shoulder. A hand that wasn't her own was resting on her shoulder. She turned to look at the origin of the hand and saw a creature of shadow staring at her with violet eyes.

"D̷o̶ ̴N̷o̴T̶ ̴a̴C̵t̴ ̷H̴a̵S̶t̷I̶l̸Y̶,̵ ̴m̸I̶s̷S̵ ̵s̴O̸r̷Y̴u̷.̴ ̷T̴h̷I̸n̶G̷s̸ ̸W̴i̶L̴l̵ ̸H̷a̸P̴p̴E̴n̶ ̷A̸t̵ ̸T̷h̶E̵i̸R̷ ̸p̷R̴o̷P̶e̷R̷ ̴t̴I̸m̶E̷."

Kyoko stared at the entity, felt its touch upon her soul, and screamed.


(Kyoko Zeppelin Soryu art by Yashi)

--------------------------------------------------------------

The iridescent light signaled the Evangelion turning on. "There, did it have to be so difficult, Third?!"

"Sorry, it just felt so different than Unit-01."

"Because this is a Production Model. Your Test Type is probably using outdated software because it can't run the latest programs." Shinji wanted to argue that, but he realized he didn't know anything about what she was talking about, so he would probably lose that argument. "Now, let's get to the Over the Rainbow so we don't lose power."

Unit-02 began using the various ships as stepping stones to get to the Over the Rainbow, Asuka muting the screams of the Captain and switching to the NERV channel that was prepared just in case. Shinji found it odd that the Angel wasn't attacking them and that it wasn't showing itself. This was very different from his usual experience fighting Angels.

"Powered up and ready to kick ass." His musings were broken by Asuka, having plugged into the Over the Rainbow and picking up the Sonic Glaive. She scanned the horizon in all directions, trying to find the Angel. "So, where is this Angelic bastard?"

"Negative sightings, Asuka, but you and Shinji keep alert," Misato informed them. "We don't know where they'll strike from."

"Um...." Shinji felt all the attention turn to him. "Maybe it's underwater?" he offered.

"Scheisse. He's right, and we're without the underwater equipment!"

"Hopefully it doesn't stay in the water permanently, then we can-"

Shinji was interrupted when a large figure burst out of the sea. It was piscine in shape with a beige color, its body was covered in a lattice of metal reminiscent of clockwork, bursting out of its skin like a thorny bramble. Four large pointed appendages somewhat like clock hands rotated around it rhythmically.

The Sixth Angel had come, and it would not be merciful.


('Gaghiel, the 6th Angel' art by Wicked-Curse)

--------------------------------------------------------------

Quake Lilim, for I, have arrived to destroy you and your pitiful existence.

Rejoice Lilim, for I, have arrived to release you from your pitiful existence.

Though I am joined to this being of a false father I will not stall in my duty.

Though I am joined to this creature not born of the fathers I will not be lax in my duty.

I will bring an end to your usurpation of our rightful planet.

I will bring an end to your thievery of our rightful land.

Though my pain is immense, my hatred for you is stronger, and it is the fuel that will end you.

Though my pain is immense, my pity towards you is stronger, and it is the strength with which I will cull you.

So hear my name and quake Lilim.

So hear my name and rejoice Lilim.

I am Gaghiel, Lord of the Sea.

I am Raguel, Master of Clockwork.

We are Gaghiel-Raguel, Abomination of the Clockwork Sea.

A̴n̵d̴ ̷t̷h̴e̴ ̷w̷o̵r̴l̴d̸ ̵w̷i̷l̴l̸ ̴k̴n̵o̸w̴ ̵o̷u̸r̸ ̴p̷a̵i̶n̵.̵


(Raguel/Clockiel)('7th Angel - combat mode')(art by hakaru - Zerochan)


Notes:
"So here we go, Shinji and Asuka(big) have finally met, and are about to fight their first Angel together. For clarity's sake, Raguel is Clockiel, just with an actual angel name. Raguel being the Judaic Angel of justice, the name meaning 'Friend of God'. Oh and Gaghiel is wearing him like an exoskeleton, causing both immense pains. Why are they fused together you may ask? That is an excellent question, the answer to that is the butterfly effect is a bitch. Also, I thought it would be interesting. How will our heroes handle Gaghiel wearing a clockwork exoskeleton? Tune in next time to find out as I dread writing another action scene. Until then, hope you enjoy, leave a review if you can, and have a pleasant day."

Note from Me:
I love the name of this chapter -- very clever.

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-08-25
Words: 5,181

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?


Chapter 14: Abomination of the Clockwork Sea

Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)


NERV Command Bridge

"-after that whole debacle, you can imagine my surprise when I find a whole bunch of Incan gold," Aoba explained to an increasingly confused Hyuga. "With a bounty like that, I was basically set! No more living in my van. Now I got an apartment with actual furniture."

"Aoba, you-" Hyuga paused as he tried to formulate a response. "You realize that as members of NERV, we have access to employee housing, right? Heck, as part of the Bridge Crew, we could potentially get housing within the Geofront itself."

Aoba blinked slowly. "Oh. I kinda wish you told me that before I signed all the paperwork. Well, on the bright side, I got a place in the same apartment complex as Captain Katsuragi, so the security there is going to be top-notch."

"Really. You're going to be neighbors with the Captain?" Hyuga's eye was twitching slightly.

"I mean, not really neighbors. I got an apartment on the ground floor on the other side of the complex, so I guess we're complex comrades. Maybe she has advice for dealing with kids 'cause my family is pushing this kid on me at the behest of my brother and I have no idea what to do about that." Aoba started tuning his guitar. How he hid that in his workstation, nobody knew.

"Your brother is pushing his kid on you?" Hyuga's eye twitch ceased and was replaced with a quizzical look.

"Not his kid, his wife's brother's stepchild. Apparently, this guy tried to pay off his debts to the Yakuza by marrying this terminally ill single mother and claiming her inheritance when she died."

"What the actual fuck, that's terrible!"

"I know, right? Anyway, the kid apparently got the inheritance and the guy couldn't get it, so he's on the run from the Yakuza now and guardianship went to my brother. But he's trying to offload her onto me because I'm slightly rich now."

"Aoba, how do you get into all these situations-" Hyuga was suddenly cut off by the Angel alarm going off. "Oh shit! Blood Pattern Blue detected!"

The bridge was suddenly a storm of activity as people who were once on their breaks began rushing into man their stations.

"Second Pattern Blue detected?!" Aoba shouted out in surprise. "No, it's one now. Wait, two again?! Now it's three!? Back to one… what is going on!?"



"Sit-rep, now!" a very out-of-breath Ritsuko shouted out, looking as if she had run a mile in under a minute to get here.

"Doctor Akagi, receiving two Pattern Blues that are fluctuating intermittently into one and back again," Technician Kaede Agano called out, currently in the midst of shifting through MAGI-Casper's data. "Third Pattern Blue was possibly detected, but it disappeared immediately after appearing. We are labeling it as a phantom signal until we can confirm it."

Ritsuko grabbed her tablet and began reading through the day herself. "Odd, it's like the two different A.T. Fields are pulling themselves together but simultaneously pushing each other apart," Ritsuko muttered. "Do we have a location?"

"Angel is believed to be on an intercept course with the Unit-02 Transport Fleet!" Hyuga called out, suddenly very worried for Misato, Shinji, and the other two children he was vaguely aware of.

"Evangelion activation detected!" Maya interrupted, surprising everyone as they didn't even notice her arrival. "Unit-02 is confirmed online, but the Eva is too far to connect to."

"Damn, get me eyes on the fleet and get Ayanami prepared for combat! I don't want to be caught flat-footed if the Angel manages to beat Unit-02," Ritsuko ordered, glancing up at the Commander's empty chair for a brief moment before returning to the stream of data on her tablet. "Quickly, people!" A chorus of affirmations sounded out and the crew went to work. Ritsuko began sorting the myriad of data sent to her, a small part of her mind hoping Misato was okay.


(Shigeru Aoba)

----------------------------------------------------------

Asuka stared at the Angel before her, the creature dwarfing even Unit-02 by a wide margin. She took in everything about it and had but one thing to say -

"Is it wearing a clockwork mech suit?"

"It looks more like an exoskeleton to me," The Third said somewhere behind her.

She could see where he was coming from, but wouldn't give him the satisfaction of acknowledging his point. "Whatever it is, we need to kill it. You're the 'experienced' one, got any tips?" she inquired, half-mockingly.

"Well, not really. The first Angel I fought beat me near unconscious until the Minisukas arrived and killed it." Did that count as her kill? She's going to count it as her kill. "The second impaled me with laser whips until I stabbed it to death." Jeez, that sounded painful. She had to begrudgingly give him credit for taking something like that, not that she would ever say that aloud. "And the third Misato hijacked all of Japan's electricity to shoot it."

"I normally wouldn't believe that, but that does sound like a plan Misato would hatch."

"I can hear you, you know," Misato piped up from the comm channel.

"I know," she retorted. "So Third, your suggestions are either get inflicted with bodily harm and hope it works or steal a nation's power supply?"

"Hmm. Leader? Shiki? Do either of you have any ideas?" She was disappointed he folded so quickly but she couldn't really blame him for seeking assistance from someone more intelligent, namely herself. Well, small versions of herself, anyway. She had mostly forgotten about them on account of not wanting to deal with them at the moment, but they must have some excellent insight. The two of them seemed to be vehemently arguing about something while pointing at the image of the Angel on the screen.

"Third, why are they arguing?" They seemed to hang around him (for some reason) - perhaps he knows what they're screaming about?

"Something about something not being right? Or whose to blame for something?" His eyes glanced over at the view screen. "Is it just me or has the Angel not attacked yet?" Now that he'd mentioned it, it was kinda weird how the Angel is just floating there.

----------------------------------------------------------

They're just standing there! Attack them!

No, they're obviously having pre-battle banter. It would be impolite to interrupt.

…..The pain of being forcibly fused to you pales in comparison to the pain of interacting with you.

I assure you, the feeling is mutual.

----------------------------------------------------------

"Perhaps it's just waiting to counter our move or something?" the Third offered weakly.

"Oh yeah? Well, it can counter this!" Asuka activated Unit-02's shoulder-mounted Spike Launcher, intent on giving the Angel a taste of sharp, painful death. The launcher activated and clicked, empty. "Are you kidding me?! Why would you leave it unloaded you absolute-" Her tirade of curses were stopped before they even began as the Angel charged at her, and she met it head on as she called her A.T. Field forth to bat the charging beast away. She had to be extra careful to not let the Over the Rainbow capsize while she fought the Angel - all her stuff was on it!

"I'll keep an eye out for the core," said the Third. "if you can stab it with the Sonic Glaive while it's charging, we should be able to beat it easily!"

The Third made a good point - if he focused on finding weak points, she could focus on kicking this thing's ass!

"It doesn't seem to have any ranged attacks so we should be fine," Shinji offered.

Suddenly, the Angel's four orbital clock hand things glowed, then each shot an inky beam that lanced towards them while making odd maneuvers. "Scheiße!" She summoned her A.T. Field once more to block the beams, the recoil of the impacts on her A.T. Field pushing the Over the Rainbow back.

"Uhhh, at least they're coming from one direction, so we know where they're coming from?" Shinji again offered.

The orbitals suddenly detached from the main body and started flying around the area, glowing with energy.

"Anything else you want to say, Third?" Asuka didn't take her eyes away from the battle, but she was giving him a look in her mind's eye right now.

"It would really be terrible if we got reinforcements to help us win the battle right now," Shinji offered a third time.

Really? Well, he's trying at least, the idiot. Suddenly a speck appeared on the water's surface out of the corner of her eye.

"Wait, is that a miniature Viking longboat?"



----------------------------------------------------------

Slightly earlier

Kaji really hated to leave them like this, but he had a package to deliver and a severe allergy to giant alien clockwork fish. He was sure they'd be fine, though. He believed in them.

"Wait, what is that?" He slowed his boat down as a fleet of tiny RC speed boats each piloted by a miniature Asuka sped past. As he wondered what just happened, the rhythm of a steady drumbeat caught his hearing. He then saw a canoe that was retrofitted into a small Viking longboat row past, the oars and drum unsurprisingly manned by more miniature Asukas. "Anta Baka! Baka-Shinji!" they chanted in unison like some sort of cult. It only got weirder when a miniature submarine surfaced next to Kaji's boat and out of its hatch popped out another mini Asuka. This one gave him a look, summoned a lance, then threw it at the floor of his boat. The lance was recalled and the hole began to leak water.

"Baka." Purpose fulfilled, the mini Asuka returned to the submarine, which dove once more.

"Huh..." Kaji muttered as he sped up his boat once more, trying to outrun the inevitable sinking. "I have a bad feeling about my immediate future." He made a mental note to invest in steel ankled boots once he got to Tokyo-3.

----------------------------------------------------------

Asuka could only stare as dozens of mini-mes in small speed boats and a small Viking longboat appeared and began pelting the Angel with oddly familiar lances. She couldn't quite recall where she saw them before, though. No matter - she pushed that thought to the back of her mind as she redoubled her thoughts on killing the Angel.

"I can't believe that worked….." she heard the Third mutter.

She was surprised that it had worked as well, but she wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth. "Less gawking, more finding the core, Third!" The orbitals flying around pelted her with their ink beams, her A.T. Field straining under the attacks. "I can't hold out forever!" She registered hearing the fleet's cannons firing, but she paid them no attention - they wouldn't be effective. She noticed that Misato had been quiet - was she hatching up a plan?

----------------------------------------------------------

"Let go of my radio!" Misato screamed at the Captain.

"Tell those brats to get off my deck!" he screamed in return. Their battle for command of the fleet had made no headway.

"Uh, Captain?"

""What?!"" Misato and the Captain shouted in unison at the first mate, who looked nervously between the two, not sure who had command.

"Uh, the fleet is ready to fire at the….. giant alien clockwork whale? Not a sentence I'd thought I'd say today….."

"Fire!" the Captain shouted.

"Conventional weapons have no effect on an Angel due to the A.T. Field! Don't waste the ammo!" Unfortunately for Misato, the fleet comms were open, and the fleet listened to the command of their normal commander. A staccato of cannon fire rang out, pelting the Angel with heavy ordinance to little to no effect. "See!?"

"Wait, doesn't one of those laser shooting things look a bit damaged?" Kensuke spoke up, watching the battle with awe and reverence. Touji was sitting in a corner, looking positively done with everything.

"Someone get these kids off the bridge!"

"Wait." Misato eyed one of the orbitals analytically. "He's right! It looks like a bit of cannon fire clipped it and it's not regenerating!"

"Meaning?" the Captain questioned, annoyed but somewhat curious as to where she was going with this.

"Meaning it probably can't protect those things with its A.T. Field if they're detached from the main body! If we can disable those things, Unit-02 won't have to stay on the defensive!"

"So what you're saying is….." The Captain felt a faint spark of glee. He had a feeling where this was going and he liked it.

"What I'm saying, Captain, is why don't we show the alien invaders the meaning of superior firepower?" Misato gave him a knowing grin and he returned it.

----------------------------------------------------------

"Gottdamn flying whale, gottdamn clockwork laser drones, and gottdamn not having a ranged weapon!" Asuka was angry at many things right now, and being forced to go on the defensive was not helping her mood. She really wanted to eviscerate this Angel to quell her bad mood. Her eyes glanced to the fleet of mini-mes distracting the main body of the Angel (she idly made a mental note to thoroughly grill Misato about them later) with their boats and is that a submarine? A miniature submarine had breached the surface of the water and was launching lance-tipped missiles at the Angel. Huh. She had to admit, her mini-mes knew how to make a spectacle, as expected of something that was also her.

"Asuka! Shinji!" Misato shouted over the comms. "Help incoming!" Suddenly the fleet's cannons went live once more and let loose a barrage, this time targeting the orbitals suppressing her. One by one they were struck down, bursting into blood or merely falling into the sea. A somewhat intact one fell near her position, slightly glowing with unspent energy. An idea formed in her head as she dropped the Sonic Glaive to the Over the Rainbow's deck and reached out to grab the falling orbital. She swung it towards the Angel's main body and proceeded to try and manipulate her A.T. Field to empower it. Something succeeded and the orbital started glowing.

"Have a taste of your own medicine, asshole!" Asuka screamed as the orbital unleashed a massive inky beam before it exploded into blood. The beam hit dead on, causing the Angel to recoil backwards. It glared at Unit-02, Asuka smirked. It opened its mouth and began to coalesce energy within, Asuka's smirk disappeared. She brought up her A.T. Field as a massive energy blast was launched at her. The A.T. Field cracked and groaned under the force of the blast, nearly capsizing the Over the Rainbow. She was not confident she could withstand another of those, let alone two or three. She needed this thing dead now!

"Asuka!"

"What is it, Third?" This had better be good.

"I saw the core!"

"What?! Where?!"

"In its mouth!"

"….The one currently collecting deadly energy that it's going to shoot at us?"

"Yes. But don't worry, I have a plan!"

She actually turned around to look at him this time. "You have a plan?" She was skeptical, but she supposed an idiot had a good idea at least twice a day, so she would hear him out.

"Yeah. I noticed that the Angel's A.T. Field drops when it uses that blast attack and returns when it starts charging again. That should give you a chance to hit the core."

Decent plan, but there was one small issue. "Attack with what, Third? As you can tell, I don't exactly have any ranged options."

"You have the Sonic Glaive."

"Yes, and?"

"How well can you throw?"

Her retort died in her throat as she figured out what he was saying. Her eyes flickered to the Sonic Glaive on the deck by Unit-02's feet as the calculations ran through her mind. Her smile grew feral as the pieces fell into place.

"Huh. Not bad, Third. You may not be so hopeless after all."

"Oh, thanks…. Hey!"

She heard her mini-mes whispering something to each other behind her, but she tuned it out as she put all her focus into her rapidly forming plan. She'd only have one shot at this.

The Angel let loose its blast once more, the energy pushing her A.T. Field to its limit. The deck beneath began to buckle as the blast pushed her back, her field shattering at the last possible second. Quickly, she kicked the Sonic Glaive into the air with the tip of Unit-02's foot, grabbed it, then with all the strength available to her, launched it into the Angel's open mouth. Her timing was perfect and her aim was dead on as the Angel's core was pierced, the Sonic Glaive passing through the Angel and continuing to fly forth to parts unknown. The Angel remained aloft for a moment longer before exploding in a shower of blood.

"To the last, I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee," Asuka quoted, glad to be rid of the whale-shaped bastard.

"Uh, what?" the Third uttered.

"Moby Dick, idiot. A literary classic."

"Oh. S-sorry, I've never read it. Anyway, congratulations on your first Angel kill."

Asuka froze as his words registered in her head. Her first Angel kill. Her first Angel kill. That's right. This was technically her first sortie, and she was victorious despite being ambushed and improperly equipped.

"The first of many, Third. I'll be catching up to you in no time."

She heard the fleet's crews erupt into cheers as she allowed herself to bask in the glory. This was a fantastic start to her piloting career.

----------------------------------------------------------

"Your delivery, sir." Kaji placed the briefcase on the desk, getting saltwater and seaweed all over it.

Gendo stared blankly at the soaking wet triple agent covered in seaweed and various ocean fauna. "Agent Kaji, why are you tracking water all over my office?"

"Boat trouble. I had to swim for a bit after my boat sank. You wanted the package delivered to you as soon as it got here, so I didn't have time to dry off."

Fuyutsuki had to hold back a snicker as he was watching this exchange.

"What, may I ask, caused this boat trouble?" Gendo really didn't care, but he would want to prevent something like this from happening again.

Kaji suddenly became very interested in the walls. "Oh, you know. Women," he stated curtly.

"Ah." Gendo could put the pieces together - dealing with an ex was never very pleasant. He politely decided not to push the matter. "As long as the package has arrived safely, I suppose all is fine." Gendo grabbed the briefcase and opened it to check the contents. "So this is it."

Kaji idly brushed a crab off his shoulder. "Indeed. This is Adam - the first human." The three of them stared at the fetus-like object encased in dura-Bakelite.

"So..." Kaji began as he poured small fish out of his cigarette pack. "Is it supposed to look like it's screaming in fear?" Indeed, Adam appeared to be frozen mid-scream, eyes dilated in fear.

"I'm sure it's fine," Gendo assured, somewhat to himself. "Everything has been accounted for. Enjoy your new position at NERV, Special Investigator Ryoji Kaji."

"Glad to be aboard. Now, could you point me in the direction of the nearest laundromat, and a store that sells steel ankled boots?"



----------------------------------------------------------

Asuka could only stare at what was before her - a tide of mini-mes retrieving their equipment from the harbor. Dozens, possibly hundreds walked past her shocked form. The tide of redheads (she even thought she saw a head of yellow or black, but she couldn't confirm that) paid her no mind as they went about their work. She felt a hand on her shoulder gently push her down, her backside meeting what felt like a folding chair.

She turned to look at the Third, who was offering her a plastic box with food in it. "It's a store-bought bento the Minisukas got for us. I'm sure you're probably hungry."

She wordlessly took it and began to mechanically eat the food provided. Eventually, the food was all gone and the box was removed from her grasp. A bottle of water was pushed into her hand. She didn't drink it - she just stared at the red tide, trying to comprehend what was before her.

"Alright, everything's squared away for now, so let's-" Misato began before Asuka had enough and decided to get some answers.

"Misato! What!?" Asuka gestured to the mass of Minisukas. "How?! Why?! Explain!"

Misato just shrugged. "Dunno. They just appeared during the Third Angel attack, and they've been a big help ever since. Haven't you read the after-action reports?"

"They'd all been redacted when I got them - they told me nothing. What do you mean you don't know? You aren't going to question the sudden and inexplicable appearance of an uncountable number of tiny mes?!"

"I'm sure Rits, the Commander, or somebody else would have said something if they were dangerous."

"That's- But- What about- Arrrrrrgh!" Asuka made wild motions trying to get her point across before giving up. "Do I at least have command over them? Are they like my own personal army?" Asuka had a hopeful and potentially dangerous gleam in her eyes.

"Would you listen to a bigger version of yourself if they suddenly appeared out of nowhere and commanded you to do something?"

Asuka opened her mouth before closing it again and taking a moment to think. "No," Asuka spat out bitterly while pouting.

"There you go then. Let's get going. I'm pretty sure you guys could do with a long shower." Misato patted Asuka and Shinji on the back. Shinji had been slowly eating his bento (sneaking pieces to Leader and Shiki) while watching the exchange.

"I could go for a shower," Asuka stated exhaustedly.

"Hey," Shinji piped up. "Where did Touji and Kensuke go?"

"Oh, that Touji kid fled the second we hit land. Kensuke's being debriefed by Section Two and instructed to be quiet about what he saw."

"Yeah, that makes sense," Shinji admitted. He was unsure as to what Touji was so afraid of during the trip, but he hoped he would get better soon.

----------------------------------------------------------

The next day.

Gendo stared at the monoliths before him. Even Keel had forgone the holographic projector this time. That did not bode well.

"We have read the report and reviewed the footage," SEELE-09 began. "To think, the Dead Sea Scrolls could be so wrong…."

Though he didn't show it, Gendo was also surprised. The Dead Sea Scrolls, while not infallible, were usually fairly accurate. Especially in regards to the Lord of the Sea, who perhaps had the most complete documentation within the Scrolls.

"Indeed, while the Dead Sea Scrolls may be incomplete and sometimes illegible, they have never been so misinformed about an event," SEELE-04 spoke.

"While the Angel encountered seemed partially based on the Sixth, it possessed an appearance and abilities unknown to us. Has an explanation been uncovered?" Gendo inquired, carefully making sure not to lay blame.

"I have discovered something that may be relevant," Keel spoke. "I studied an apocryphal text written by one of our now dead branch organizations during the Renaissance that spoke of a 'master of clockwork' that bore the name Raguel. While not an exact match, it is eerily similar to what was seen."

"I see. Did the text mention anything else?" SEELE-7 inquired.

"Not much besides mad ravings, but I am combing through any other texts available just in case this is not a one-time issue." There was a long pause as they appeared to be having a private conversation without him. Curious. "Ikari."

"Yes, Chairman?"

"How are your Evangelion manufacturing capabilities?"

That legitimately caught Gendo off guard, but he quickly controlled his features. "Could you clarify?"

"Could you produce a fully functional Eva Unit with what you possess in Tokyo-3?"

They continued to catch him off guard with these questions. What were they thinking? He reviewed his knowledge of the production facilities he possessed within the Geofront proper. Quickly coming to a conclusion, he answered. "Nothing that would be equal to a Production Model. At best it would be a Prototype Model with some issues ironed out and a few Production Mode improvements included." He was lowballing his capabilities, but not by much. If he were to create a wholly new Unit, some corners would have to be cut. "This is assuming I am forgoing using the same methods used to build Unit-01."

"You assume correctly, Ikari. Consider this permission to begin construction on this new Unit, now dubbed Provisional Unit-05. Do you have a timeframe?"

Gendo had to suppress a shudder - something was seriously wrong. "Roughly four to six months minimum if nothing goes wrong. May I inquire as to why this decision has been made?" The Old Men were panicking about something and he wanted to know what.

"Considering the Ishim and the sudden change in what is known about the Dead Sea Scrolls, we have seen fit to ensure our success against the Angels. A spare Eva Unit will help with that. We need to take steps like this and more to prevent…. unforeseen issues from affecting the Scenario. We have much to do, Ikari, so we need to leave. You have your orders. Stay vigilant."

The monoliths flickered out of existence, leaving Gendo and Fuyutsuki alone once more.

"The Old Men are panicking. They would never allow this in anything but the direst of circumstances. Are they that worried about the inaccuracies of the Dead Sea Scrolls?" Fuyutsuki wondered aloud.

"No, something else must have happened, something independent of the Angels. Contact our agents and have them start digging - we need to stay on top of this. I will inform Akagi of her new responsibilities regarding the Provisional Unit-05."

"There's a storm brewing, Rokubungi. I hope we are sturdy enough to weather it."

Gendo said nothing, for as much as he hated to admit it, he was thinking the same.

----------------------------------------------------------

"So what has the investigation turned up?" Keel questioned.

"Unfortunately, nothing. The three unfinished Eva-Series units have disappeared with no trace en route to our storage facility at Bethany Base. It's almost as if they just walked away when nobody was looking," SEELE-03 explained.

"That should be impossible considering they had no legs and no souls in their cores!" SEELE-06 countered.

"So how do you explain nobody on the transport convoy seeing anything?!"

"Gentlemen, we should stop questioning how they got away and investigate where they are now," SEELE-12 spoke up. "We need to recover them as soon as we can. In the wrong hands, they could be the catalyst that ruins Complementation!"

"I can see it now - some Anti-NERV group will use them to invade the Geofront and reduce all our plans to ashes!" SEELE-05 anguished.

"Silence!" Keel shouted. "We'll start from the beginning. There must be some details we overlooked." He paused to let the others refocus their attention on him. "The convoy was a closely guarded secret, so whoever knew about it must be close." They all looked nervously at each other. "I do not suspect any of you - I know none of you would jeopardize Instrumentality. Whoever did this had the knowledge of where they were, knowledge of how to use them, and the ability…. to…. move…. them….. unseen." If Keel still had eyes, they would have narrowed.

"Is everything alright, Chairman?" SEELE-02 asked, suddenly very worried.

"I am fine. There is something I must check on now. Discuss amongst yourselves. I will return shortly."

Keel grabbed his cane and left to go check on his 'guest'.

----------------------------------------------------------

The door opened with a hiss, revealing an almost normal room containing a bed, a chair, a television set, a dresser, and an antique grand piano. Sitting at the piano was the subject of Keel's visit.

"Ah, Chairman, what do I owe the pleasure?" Tabris spoke merrily.

Keel noticed that Tabris's hair had grown long enough to cover the entirety of his left eye. Odd.

"Tabris. Are you aware that three unfinished Eva-Series units have gone missing?"

"My word, that is curious. From what I understand, things that go missing have some sort of cosmic tendency to be between couch cushions or in a coat pocket, but I believe an Eva Unit would be far too big to be found there."

"Indeed. Would you perhaps know anything about that?"

"No. Why would you think that I would?"

"No reason. I just recall that nobody was able to find you during the exact time they went missing."

"I was well hidden, for I wanted silence to contemplate dogs."

"Dogs?" Keel repeated dryly.

"Yes. They are magnificent creatures, aren't they? Petting one melts all your worries away, not to mention their necks aren't as snappable as a cat's neck."

"Of course. I noticed you changed your hair."

"Yes, I have heard the 'emo style' is in fashion so I wished to try it out. How does it look? Do I appear to be a person that would brood in a mall shop?"

"Yes, and it's terrible. Part your hair please, Tabris." Tabris did so, revealing an eyepatch. "Tabris, why are you wearing an eyepatch?"

"I wish to try piracy. I want to know what it is like to download a car."

Keel pinched the bridge of his nose. "Remove the eyepatch, please." Tabris did so, revealing a closed eye. Keel was done with all these games. "Tabris, open your eye." Tabris opened his eye, revealing nothing out of the ordinary. Keel continued to stare at him.

"Is that all, Chairman?"

"Yes, Tabris. Continue as you were." Keel left, grumbling something about kids under his breath.


(Tabris art by tellmin)

----------------------------------------------------------

Kaworu waited for the Chairman to leave before he stumbled to the bathroom, grabbing the sink to hold himself upright. He stared at his reflection in the mirror, noticing the umbral tendrils in his left eye, snaking towards his pupil. Suddenly his reflection smiled, independent of what he was doing, and spoke within him like nails against the chalkboard of his soul.

"Y̴o̴u̵r̸ ̸w̷o̵r̷k̸ ̷h̸a̷s̴ ̷b̴e̷e̶n̶ ̶s̵a̶t̷i̷s̴f̸a̸c̵t̷o̴r̵y̶,̶ ̸T̷a̷b̴r̶i̷s̵."


Notes:
"Another action scene bites the dust. Hopefully, everything was comprehensible. With that Asuka is in Tokyo-3 proper, and she is ready to be confused about the Minisukas even more. So to explain a few things, it's never stated that Aoba has a brother or lives in a van in any official Evangelion media (that I'm aware of), I just made those up for this story. Kaede Agano is an extracanonical character introduced in the Shinji Ikari Raising Project game where, like Satsuki Ooi, is a bridge crew member in charge of monitoring one of the Magi, and a romance option. Gahgiel-Raguel's orbitals are basically just Clockiel's leg/hip things that use Clockiel's inky laser attack. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy. Leave a review if you want, and have a pleasant day."

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957


Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-08-25
Words: 3,793

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?


Chapter 15: The Dance of Avengement


Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)


The Philippines, shortly after the fight against the Sixth Angel

"So let me get this straight - you built a tourist attraction centered around a giant polearm and forgot to budget for a giant polearm?!" the woman shrieked incredulously.

"Yes," the man stated calmly.

"So it was all for nothing?! You spent so much of our savings on a failure! What, did you think a giant polearm would fall from the sky?!"

Suddenly, something impacted the ground nearby with enough force to knock them prone and kick up a massive wave of dust. They shakily got to their feet and stared at the center of the area as the dust settled. A familiar polearm, still dripping with the ichor of the Sixth Angel, was sticking out of the ground.

"See?" The man gestured towards the Sonic Glaive. "It all worked out in the end."

The woman opened her mouth, closed it, scowled at the man, then stomped off in a huff.

------------------------------------------------------------

A few days later

Hikari Horaki scanned the room as she took a gulp of her Solaryens espresso, letting the caffeine flow through her body. She didn't like having to drink coffee, but dealing with Nozomi and three Minisukas on top of being a class representative meant that she needed some kind of pick-me-up in the morning. If only the caffeine helped her figure out if it was the Minisukas or Kodama teaching Nozomi swears.

"Hmmmmmm..." She heard Suzuhara breathe out in that masculine voice of his. He and Aida were watching something on Aida's computer. If they're watching anything inappropriate before the new transfer student gets here, she swore she would give them quite a thrashing! She noted the three Minisukas were playing rock-paper-scissors on her desk for some reason, so she let them be and investigated what Suzuhara and Aida were doing. She walked up behind them, their attention so focused on the computer they didn't notice her approach. On the screen, there was a pink-haired girl in a tracksuit doing some kind of dance. The girl stopped dancing and Aida paused the video.

"So, what do you think, Touji?" Aida questioned.

"You were right, Ken. She's rough 'round the edges but she's got potential," Suzuhara answered back, leaving Hikari very confused. What were they talking about?

"Right? While her form is that of a beginner, she's got a subtle creativity to her choreography that leads me to believe she could be more. She also vlogs."

"Don't know 'bout the vlog thing, but I'll be keepin' my eye on this 'K-Nami' girl fer now."

"You and half the class. She's a fairly popular streamer on UsVision, you know?"

"Meanin' what, Ken?"

"Yeah, Aida."

Suzuhara and Aida nearly jumped a foot into the air when she announced her presence. ""Class Rep?!" they shouted in unison.

"Indoor voices," she ordered calmly before taking another sip of her espresso. "What are you two doing? Nothing inappropriate, I hope."

"Not at all, Class Rep!" Aida answered quickly. "We're just rating a dance video."

"Rating a dance video?" she repeated incredulously.

"Yeah, Class Rep," Suzuhara continued. "Ever since Ken got us stuck as some crazy one-eyed Yakuza's backup dancers-" What?

"It was an accident!" Aida lamented.

"-we've been doing abuncha dance stuff like giving advice and actin' as judges and stuff."

"Yeah, Class Rep, nothing weird going on here." Aida leaned back, accidentally hitting the next video button.

"What's up, my little Laserlings? Ramy L. is here! You better watch out or I'll blast you with my death beam of love~" Aida quickly closed the browser program.

"Recommended videos, huh? The algorithm is crazy." Aida failed to meet her or Suzuhara's eyes.

Her mind, however, was still focused on something that was said earlier. "Wait, what was that about a one-eyed Yakuza?"

"Don't worry about it," Aida deflected.

"I think it's something I probably should worry-"

"Look, Class Rep," Aida interrupted, "instead of worrying about whether or not Suzuhara and I are considered honorary underlings of the Wild Wyvern of Tatsumi-" What? "-you should worry about things like why is Ayanami setting the blackboard eraser to fall on whoever opens the door next?" Aida's tone morphed from nonchalance to genuine confusion as she confirmed that, yes, Rei Ayanami was setting up a prank.

Rei Ayanami was setting up a prank.

Rei Ayanami was setting up a prank.

Rei Ayanami was setting up a prank.

Hikari had to blink as her mind struggled to comprehend what she was seeing right now, but her instincts as a class representative pushed her toward the delinquent behavior.

"Ayanami?" Hikari began, half unsure what to say. "What are you doing?" At this point, everyone in the classroom was staring at Ayanami in unblinking shock.

"Vengeance," Ayanami stated in her usual monotone, though Hikari could almost swear she heard some small hint of emotion in her voice.

"Well, as the class representative, I'm going to have to request that you stop before-"

Unfortunately, her reprimand was halted when Ayanami slapped a hand over her mouth."Shhh. The time of avengement draws nigh." Could she have worded that a little less ominously?

Suddenly, the door opened and the eraser fell down upon what looked like a Minisuka, covering her in chalk dust. Ayanami released Hikari and looked for a fraction of a microsecond like she had a smug smirk before turning around and going to sit at her desk. As Ayanami sat down, a loud sound not unlike someone passing wind reverberated throughout the classroom. Silence reigned for a moment before Ayanami reached down and retrieved a whoopie cushion from her chair.

Suddenly, devilish laughter filled the air as a Minisuka dressed in a cloak, top hat, and monocle cackled from her perch upon an open windowsill. The figure at the door was revealed to somehow be a cardboard cutout decoy. The cackling lasted until an unusually large swallow swooped down and grabbed the Minisuka with its talons, carrying her off while she let out a confused shriek.

The entire classroom was silent. All eyes were on Rei Ayanami, who was glaring at the now empty windowsill with an aura of hate. She crushed the cushion in her grasp before blinking, pausing to blow air into it, then crushing it again until it popped. "You may have won this battle, but I shall emerge victorious in the war," Ayanami stated, before returning to a familiar neutral position staring out the window.

Hikari contemplated confronting Ayanami again, but decided better of it and returned to her desk. Everything that had happened in the past fifteen minutes was mentally filed away to deal with later. The Minisukas on her desk had devolved into a three-way grappling match. Hikari sighed as she finished her espresso. The new transfer student would hopefully be less trouble.



------------------------------------------------------------

Fuyutsuki stared at the bare torso of their newest Evangelion in construction - the dull core, empty of a soul until they decided on a candidate, being displayed as the centerpiece. A marvelous thing, really. An Eva unit could survive even decapitation as long as the core was intact, though the same couldn't be said of the pilot.

"Sub-Commander." The exhausted voice of Doctor Akagi came from behind him. "To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit?"

"Just marveling at the progress you've made in such a few short days."

Akagi scoffed in response. "It's just a spare torso from a Unit-00 batch - most of this new unit will be made of similar spare parts. Hell, we might not even have time for legs. I might just equip it with an experimental roller rig we have lying around. Not like we have the budget for much else."

"Rest assured I'm working on that. Did you know we can cut down our medical expenses by offering employees and their families health care from our medical facilities?"

Akagi hummed in confusion at that. "How so?"

"For instance, one of our engineering staff, a Mister Suzuhara, is using our current medical policy to subsidize his daughter's treatment through the local hospital at our partial expense. The hospital is using this to charge him and us through the nose in medical fees. If we were to just cut out the middleman and have his daughter treated here, it would be cheaper for us and our more advanced facilities would have her get better faster, improving Mister Suzuhara's morale."

Akagi stared at him with wide eyes. "That's…. Wow. That sounds like it would give us some breathing room in creating this new unit. How did you come to this conclusion, if you don't mind me asking?"

He preemptively shot down her question. "I got financial advice from a chicken with a business degree. Don't ask." He didn't want to explain that rollercoaster of insanity without a few glasses of hard liquor in him. "Getting back on topic, despite your limitations, I'm sure you'll create an excellent Eva unit."

"Compared to Yui Ikari and Kyoko Zeppelin Soryu, my work might as well be a pale imitation," Akagi noted, bitterness dripping from her tone.

"Comparing your work to two of the three who revolutionized the field of metaphysical biology is folly, Doctor Akagi. If all you see is the ever-distant summit, other paths will be lost to you," he lectured, feeling his old lecturing muscles beginning to awaken.

However, something else caught the Doctor's attention. "Three? I'm familiar with Yui and Kyoko, but who's the third? The Commander?"

He chuckled a bit at that. "Heavens, no. While the good Commander is quite well versed in metaphysical biology, he is by no means comparable to Yui. His talents lay…. elsewhere. No, I'm talking about another of my students, Mary Iscariot."

"I'm….. unfamiliar."

"She didn't exactly get a chance to show her talents to the world. She…. disappeared during the events of Second Impact," he noted as a familiar despair ached in his chest.

"Disappeared? She was never confirmed dead?"

"No trace of what happened to her was ever found, but the Commander and I refuse to believe a near-apocalyptic global level disaster would ever put the whirlwind of chaos, Mary Iscariot, down." He even suspected she would survive Third Impact if given the chance.

"You and the Commander?"

Oh dammit, he let too much slip. He was getting too talkative in his old age. Well, in for a penny, in for a pound, as Mary would always say.

"Keep this to yourself, but Mary was one of the few people Gendo ever considered a friend. He and Yui would've made her Shinji's godmother if Yui hadn't vanished."

"Huh, I can't see him of all people having friends," she noted with a tone he hadn't heard her use before.

"It was a different time. A better time. A time I sometimes wish had never ended." A flash of a memory when he was dragged by a quartet of students to a New Years' party left a bittersweet taste in his mouth. "Well, I'll leave you to your work, Doctor. Be sure to take a break sometimes - we can ill afford mistakes at this time."

She grumbled something as she returned to her work. He returned to his office to do the same, letting memories of a happier time fill his head as he walked.

------------------------------------------------------------



Asuka wrote her name upon the chalkboard in an elegant English cursive font, though halfway through, she suspected it would probably be like alien runes to the normal Japanese junior high student. Well, Asuka Langley Soryu was no quitter, so she didn't stop. Her being spiteful at even having to go to junior high when she was already a college graduate had nothing to do with it, nope.

"I'm Asuka Langley Soryu. Charmed, huh?" she said as she turned to face the class. The first thing she noticed was the idiot Third with the duo of mini-mes hanging off him (note to self - investigate the reason for that later) and a dumb smile on his face. The small part of her mind that said his smile was cute was once again thrown back into the supermax prison specially made for it once the oubliette was proving ineffective. The second thing she noticed was the blue-haired girl, who from previous inquiries made to the Third could be identified as the First Child. The third thing she noticed was nearly everyone else staring at her in horror. She stared at the deathly silent class, wondering what was going on before some male student sprang to his feet.

"There's a big one now! It's an omen of the end times! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" He, along with several others, sprinted out of the classroom, screaming. Others appeared to have fainted at their desks.

A girl with pigtails and an exhausted expression walked up to her. "Hello, Miss Soryu, I'm the class representative, Hikari Horaki. I apologize for the rudeness of our classmates." She bowed in apology, some sort of Japanese custom if Asuka had to guess. "I would explain things to you but unfortunately I now have to go round up the runaways. Take….. the seat over there next to Ikari - Takada lost his seat privileges when he ran out. Ask Ikari if you have any questions while I'm away."

Asuka was about to say something in response when she noticed a trio of mini-mes handing the Horaki girl an actual net gun. She nodded at the mini-mes before stomping off, a menacing aura radiating off her body. Asuka blinked before wordlessly taking her seat next to the Third. She noticed that the teacher had not reacted in any way, shape, or form to the events that had transpired.

"Hey, Third?"

"Hmm? What's up, Asuka?"

"Is…. this place always so weird?"

"What do you mean?" he asked with a confused look on his face.

She'd take that as a yes. "Never mind." She could feel a headache beginning to form because of all this nonsense. The teacher started to drone on about Second Impact despite the lack of students. Asuka quietly groaned as she wondered what Kaji was doing.

------------------------------------------------------------

"Guess who?"

"Kaji, get your hands away from my eyes. I have way too much work to do to entertain your shenanigans," Ritsuko ground out.

"Jeez, sorry. Just trying to say hello to an old friend." He gave her a disarming smile that she had long since grown immune to.

"Yes, hello. Now leave me to my-" Ritsuko blinked and stared at Kaji's feet in utter bewilderment. "Kaji, why are you wearing plate mail boots? And how were you able to sneak up on me without making a sound?"

"Protection and practice, in that order," he answered without missing a beat.

"You've had practice sneaking around in plate mail boots?" A roguish grin was his only response. "Well, no matter how much practice you've had, it seems like it's not enough to avoid her." Ritsuko pointed to a very angry Misato pressed up against the laboratory glass. Kaji's smile only faltered for half a second when he spotted her.

Misato burst into the room like an assassin seeking to avenge the death of their dog. "You," Misato ground out. "Funny, I didn't see you on the ship after Asuka beat the Angel."

"Oh, you know me, Misato." Kaji quickly made multiple escape plans to save himself from Misato's wrath. "I had so much to do, so much to see. So I had to split early to make a few appointments on time."

"Oh really?" Misato said with a venom that did not match her angelic smile. "Excuse me for a second. I have to make an announcement." Warning bells immediately blared in Kaji's head, but he didn't know why. Misato picked up Ritsuko's phone (Ritsuko had gone back to her work at this point, ignoring the lover's quarrel) and used her credentials to make a facility-wide announcement. "Attention United Nations Special Inspector Ryoji Kaji, currently located within Ritsuko Akagi's office. Your car, located in parking lot section 7-A, is slightly over the line. Please correct this at your earliest convenience." Misato returned the phone to the cradle and gave Kaji a smirk.

"Misato, what was that?" Kaji asked, a feeling of dread building within him.

"Oh, nothing. I just thought I'd help you test out your new shoes."

Before Kaji could question that, the door to the office opened. "Anta Baka!" a Minisuka shouted, pointing at Kaji with her lance. Suddenly, he knew exactly what Misato had done.

"I'd suggest running," Misato added helpfully.

So he did. Like an Olympic athlete, he sprinted past the first Minisuka and down the hall, quite quickly considering his footwear. Moments later a horde of Minisukas began chasing him, shouting out warcries demanding blood.

"Misato, stop directing unknown beings we can barely control to get back at your ex," Ritsuko chided.

"No."



------------------------------------------------------------

The ring of the lunch bell was music to Asuka's ears. This teacher was the incarnation of boredom with his droning about Second Impact without pause. He didn't even notice when that Horaki girl dragged in a netted bundle of all the runaway students (something that gave her a few points of respect from Asuka).

She was ready to sprint out of there when an errant tap on her shoulder distracted her. "Um, Asuka?" the Third spoke up meekly. She glared at him - how dare he interrupt her freedom?! "The, uh, school food isn't really good, so I made you a boxed lunch. To make your first day a bit better."

Oh. She took the box from the boy who refused to make eye contact with her. She eyed the box suspiciously. "You didn't do anything weird, did you, Third?" She was suspicious. On one hand, homemade lunch would undoubtedly beat out whatever slop they served here. On the other hand, he was a boy, and boys would undoubtedly try and use underhanded means to get to her perfect body like the perverts they were.

"N-no! I would never!" he shouted with genuine indignation. Hmmm. Well, he didn't seem like a skeevy weirdo and he was a fellow Pilot, so she'd give him the benefit of the doubt just this once.

"Fine, but it'd better be delicious!" She opened the box and was immediately hit with a mouthwatering smell. Schinkennudeln, bratwurst cut up like little octopuses, and a small apple strudel with a little drizzle of vanilla sauce. Gott in Himmel, this was a perfect German dish. "Third, what the hell," she blurted out, her vocal functions not fully in her control.

"Oh, do you not like it? I-I made what Leader and Shiki usually like, so I thought you might like it, too. Sorry."

Oh shit, if he gets the wrong idea, she might never get another meal like this again! Quick Asuka, damage control!

"No, it's fine!" she blurted out a little too forcefully. "I mean, this is an acceptable dish. Undoubtedly much better than whatever garbage they serve here. In fact, I'm appointing you as in charge of my lunch from now on to ensure I don't get sick from whatever food they'll make me eat here." Good, make it seem like he's earned the position. She pointedly ignored Leader's knowing smirk.

"Sure. If you want me to make you lunch from now on, I'd be more than happy to. Maybe Ayanami would like one, too?"

"Ayanami? The First Child?" The Third nodded in response. "Excellent idea, Third! I've been meaning to talk to her! Come on, let's go!" She grabbed his wrist and dragged him over to the First's desk. "Hey, First!"

"Pilot Soryu, how may I help you?" Jeez, her red eyes were creepy.

"The Idiot here wants to offer his cooking skills to save your palette from this school's menu. And I want to offer my friendship!"

The Third started sputtering something, like the adorable idiot he was. Quickly, the part of her mind that used 'adorable' as a descriptor for the Third was thrown back into the mental supermax where it belonged.

The First just stared back. "The food here has suffered budget cuts as of late. I see no reason to refuse if offered. But does friendship assist with vengeance?" What?

"Vengeance?" Asuka repeated in confusion.

"Ayanami has an obsession with vengeance towards one of the Minisukas," the Third whispered to her. "It's kind of concerning. She talks about it in very ominous terms."

Huh. "Uh, possibly?" Asuka answered, unsure of how else to proceed in this conversation.

"Then I will accept your friendship offer as well. Let the heralds sound their trumpets at this dread occasion."

Gott, he wasn't kidding. "Great, let's eat!" Asuka really just wanted to eat right now and possibly get some acetaminophen for her growing headache. Hopefully, things would get less weird over time. Though she had a feeling she was forgetting something…. Well, it probably wasn't important if she forgot about it.



------------------------------------------------------------

Prankster hobbled down the mountain path using her lance as support. That large swallow was a tough bastard. Thankfully, that weird mountain hermit with the extremely long sword, purple hair, and robes cut down that swallow in mid-flight, allowing her to escape. That, however, didn't solve the issue of getting back to civilization. She should probably take a break before she started on the next leg of her journey back towards Tokyo-3. Suddenly, a fox emerged from the brush and swiftly snatched her up in its mouth, hauling her off toward the unknown as she shrieked in frustration.

"Anta Baka!?"




Notes:
"Asuka begins to stake her claim on Tokyo-3, unsuspecting of all the strange happenings. I am aware that Mari's true name is supposed to be Maria Iscariot, but I just think Mary fits her better and also has the added benefit of differentiating her from another character named Maria in the Evangelion expanded universe. Does this mean Mari will make an appearance? Probably not. Mary however might. Possibly. I guarantee nothing. Not really much else to say about this chapter. Hope you all enjoyed, leave a review if you want, and have a pleasant day."

Notes from Me:
Schinkennudeln, meaning "ham noodles," is a classic German comfort food that is beloved by children and adults alike. There are many variations to this basic dish of German ham pasta. (Wikipedia)

The meme at the end of the chapter is from the anime Fate Stay/Night Unlimited Blade Works. The "weird mountain hermit with the extremely long sword, purple hair, and robes" (Assassin) actually talked of cutting down a sparrow, but the fact that he's dueling a genderbent version of King Arthur made the Monty Python reference too good to ignore.

[jeffrey-dallas]

Since the Evangelion Rebuild films confirmed that Asuka, like Rei, was a clone series, I had been thinking of a story or picture series involving mini-Asuka and mini-Rei clones running amok from NERV’s “Reiquarium”. It turns out the author of the following got to the mini-idea first -- at least the Asuka part of it.

The author "Blackunknown" gave me permission to reprint it here if credit is given and a link is made to the source. The following sites are posting the story:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14091553/1 ... -Minisukas
https://archiveofourown.org/works/40337 ... /101040957


Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rise of the Minisukas
Author: Blackunknown
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Categories: F/M
Tags: Action; Comedy; Humor; Tiny Asukas: they protecc / they attacc / they Got Their Baka's Back; Pen-Pen is a financial wizard; there's a plot I swear; some Extracanonical stuff included
Published: 2022-08-25
Words: 3,575

Summary: What's better than one normal-sized temperamental redhead that calls you an idiot? How about an uncountable number of tiny temperamental redheads that communicate only by calling you an idiot and have tiny lances created by an ancient precursor civilization? What do you mean that's not better?


Chapter 16: Transmorphing Shadows

Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)


"Hey, Mayumi?"

A voice to Mayumi's side spoke up shortly after the final bell rang. She turned to look at the individual, wondering who would speak with her of all people. Unfortunately, it was Nene Matsukaze.

"Oh, Miss Matsukaze, how may I help you?" Mayumi really didn't want to talk to this girl. She was weird and her other classmates might think she was a conversationalist if they saw her engaging in conversation. Mayumi absolutely did not want that.

"Did you hear? Apparently, there's a big version of the small ones that walk around here sometimes. Weird, huh?"

"What are you talking about?" Mayumi parsed the redhead's words and suddenly came to a conclusion that she hoped was wrong. "Wait, you mean the tiny redheads? There's a big one?"

Nene nodded vigorously. "Yeah! Sandy told me so!" She held out her teddy bear.

"No, I said to devour the flesh and souls of the innocent so you may join me as my Queen in the Demon World!" the demon Sandyarlforq attempted to say, but his plush prison had no way to vocalize words, so he was unheard.

"Of course, Sandy. We can get a bagel after school. What kind of cream cheese would you like?" Nene asked, misinterpreting everything.

"…..Cinnamon sugar cream cheese please," the demon-possessed teddy bear muttered indignantly, hoping his intent was picked up.


(Nene Matsukaze and Sandy)

Mayumi, however, had escaped to find confirmation of this sighting. And she did so, finding one Asuka Langley Soryu walking out the gate with one Shinji Ikari (along with Leader and Shiki, of course). "No….." Mayumi muttered in horror. "You!" she screamed, pointing a finger at Shinji, who had jumped in shock at the sudden sound.

Shinji turned around and adopted an amateur fighting stance drilled into him by mandatory NERV self-defense courses, nearly tripping over himself and almost throwing off Leader and Shiki in the process. He blinked and relaxed his stance as he recognized the person screaming at him. "Oh, you're Yamagishi, right? How can I help you?"

"Friend of yours, Third?" Asuka inquired, eying the strange screaming girl critically. Why did she have a strange urge to strangle this girl? And why did she remind her of Shinji in a dress? Why did she have the sudden urge to put Shinji in a dress? Asuka made a mental note to revisit this thought process later.

"You lied!" Mayumi hissed, closing the distance between them with surprising speed. "You said I wouldn't transmorph into one of them!" Mayumi pointed to Leader and Shiki, who had stabilized their footing and had taken defensive positions, unsure of what was going on.

"You shouldn't-"

"Then how do you explain her?" Mayumi gestured to a thoroughly confused Asuka. "She's obviously transmorphing!"

"I….what?" To say Asuka was baffled would be an understatement. She really wanted to leave but she was also morbidly curious as to where this was going, so she decided to stay. She regretted this choice when Mayumi grabbed her hands.

"You poor thing! Who were you before your change? Were you a normal girl? Are they forcing you to read terrible fashion magazines?" Mayumi questioned rapidly, a manic look in her eyes.

"I…like fashion magazines?" Asuka answered, overwhelmed by this strange situation.

"Oh no! How far gone are you?! How long do I have myself?! Don't worry, I'll find a way to save the both of us!" Mayumi glared at Shinji. "Know this, Ikari, I will stop you and your mini menaces from whatever vile plan you have!"

"What-"

"You won't ruin my normal and uninteresting life!" Mayumi sprinted away, leaving behind four very confused individuals.

"Third, what in Gott's name was that all about?"

"I'm….. not entirely sure?"

"Anta Baka?" Leader helpfully added. Shiki had returned to napping in Shinji's chest pocket.

"Hmmm..." Asuka just chalked it up to Japan being weird but made a note to watch out for the crazy glasses girl in the future. She began walking again, Shinji idly following behind her. "So, Third, any reason why my mini-mes are hanging around you constantly?"

"Sorry, but I don't know. They just kinda appeared?" Shinji offered.

"Seriously?" She looked Shinji up and down, analyzing him like a predator analyzing prey. She was worried he might be doing indecent things to the mini-mes, but she concluded that he was far too meek to do such a thing. If the Minisukas were anything like her (which they most certainly should be), they wouldn't stand for that and would give him a thrashing if he did.

"Well, don't worry, I'm here now! So I'll take them off your hands!" If the Leader one was really the leader of all the mini-mes, she should recognize that hanging around her would be far better than hanging around the Third Child. And she wanted Shiki's hat, preferably a bigger version.

Shiki glared at Asuka for a moment before clicking her tongue in disdain, proceeding to flip Asuka off. "Bakasuka."

Sudden silence enveloped the area, even the song of the ever-present cicadas ceased at this single utterance. Shinji was gawking in disbelief, Leader was suddenly pale and sweating, and Asuka resembled the physical manifestation of indignant fury made flesh.

"You wanna say that to me again, you little shit?" Asuka had a deceptively calm tone despite looking like rage made manifest. Shiki took that as a challenge and stood up in Shinji's pocket, then used both hands to flip Asuka off - "Bakasuka."



Shiki's whisper sounded like a thermonuclear explosion to the two bystanders currently caught in the crossfire. Shinji glanced at Leader, hoping she had a way out of this. Leader, however, was making many motions to Shiki to stop! None were heeded, as the situation threatened to go critical.

Thankfully, an unlikely savior arrived in the nick of time. "Hey, kiddo!" a slightly frazzled Kaji called out from within his slightly damaged car behind them. "Need a ride?"

"Kaji!" Asuka's body and personality did a complete 180, bouncing over to the car, the imminent altercation completely forgotten. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, I was running some errands, then I saw you two and thought you might need a lift." Kaji nervously glanced at his rearview mirror, as if something was chasing him.

"That would be fantastic! You're never home and your stuff hasn't even arrived!" Asuka complained as she got into the car.

"Yes, well, lots of work to do." Kaji politely didn't mention that he was living in a completely different complex, only saying he was putting her up at his place to distract her from tracking his actual apartment down. "What about you, Shinji? Need a ride?"

"….No thanks, Mister Kaji. I think I'll walk." Shinji did not want to reignite the arms race between Shiki and Asuka, so he found it would be best for them to go their separate ways.

"Suit yourself. See you later, Shinji."

Kaji began driving away, but Asuka decided to get the last word in. "I'm expecting more lunch tomorrow, Third! Don't forget it or you'll get a thrashing!"

Shinji waved goodbye as they drove off, then a group of cats being ridden by Minisukas burst out of an alleyway and began chasing after the car.

"Huh..." Shinji muttered as he watched the chase, before turning to Shiki. "Shiki, what the heck was that? Also, you could say four things this entire time?!"

"Anta Baka?!" Leader shared Shinji's feelings on the first part and chose to ignore the second for now.

"Baka." Shiki shrugged and returned to her nap. Leader sighed and gave Shinji a look that said, 'I'll deal with this later'.

Shinji sighed as well and began his trek back home. One day he'd understand the Minisukas, but today was not that day.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Makoto Hyuga let out an exhausted sigh. Another day done, who knows how many more to go. It seemed like a good idea at the time - join NERV and get an extremely generous salary to help pay off his student loans and help save the world in the process. He wasn't expecting to be at the forefront of all the world-saving, but he also wasn't expecting all the paperwork. Now with all his student loans gone in what colleges were now calling the 'Loanpocalypse' (apparently the MAGI were indiscriminate in their loan deletions), he was not sure why he was staying. Then he remembered - Misato Katsuragi. Also, he suspected the NDA he signed made it so he couldn't quit.

"I'm home," he muttered as he entered his apartment, more out of habit. He didn't expect anyone to-

"Welcome back."

"Gyah!?" He nearly kept a foot in the air as he reached for his NERV standard issue self-defense sidearm (now with 33 percent fewer fatalities) before he recognized the individual who had broken into his home. "Ayanami?! How many times have I told you not to break into my apartment?!"

"Forty-three," Ayanami answered with her usual uninterested tone. "I wish to consult you. My plan failed, and I was unexpectedly counterpranked."

Makoto sighed. Of course. "Alright, just give me a minute. You want some tea?"

"Tea would be pleasant, thank you." Ayanami began sitting at the kitchen table while Makoto went to brew some tea. Soon enough, they were sitting at the table with a cup of tea in hand.

"I see…." He parsed the retelling of Ayanami's day in his mind. "Seems like this Prankster is a far more experienced foe than I gave her credit for."

"Is there a way to overcome her experience, Lieutenant Hyuga?"

"Planning. To quote Sun Tzu 'If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the results of a hundred battles'. This applies to pranking as well as war. To succeed against your rival, you must understand her as well as you understand yourself."

Ayanami blinked and her eyes focused on something beyond him. "What if I do not understand myself, Lieutenant Hyuga?"

Oh shit, this was something he was unprepared for. "Well, uh, you should try to understand yourself before anything else, but I don't think I could help with that."

"Then whom should I inquire about to understand myself?"

"A therapist?"

"NERV has lacked a therapist ever since the previous head therapist was arrested for illegally prescribing Methylphenidate to college students in Tokyo-2 who lacked requirements to be prescribed said drugs."

Huh, that explained a lot. "What about a therapist outside of NERV?" he offered.

"That would require U.N. clearance and permission from Commander Ikari. I do not believe there is anyone nearby who can fulfill that role."

Right, she was a Pilot. There was probably a massive load of red tape they’d have to wade through to get something like that.

"Uh, I hear Amagi, one of the third shift bridge crew members, has a psychology degree and a license to practice as a therapist. Maybe she can help you?"

"Hmmm... she is already employed under NERV so she is undoubtedly vetted, and she most likely has a sufficient level of clearance to communicate with the Pilots if she works as a bridge crew member." Ayanami nodded. "This will work. Thank you, Lieutenant Hyuga. You have given me much to contemplate. I must now go 'understand myself' so I may obtain vengeance." She finished her tea and walked off, leaving Makoto alone once more.

"Sorry, Amagi, hopefully you can handle her." He downed the rest of his tea as well before heading to the fridge to grab a beer. "I'll buy you a drink next time we're at the bar."


("Emperor of China" art by REAGENT)

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Later that evening.

Shiki stared at Shinji's sleeping form, as she usually did at night. After all, she was the one who chose this role.

She felt the parasite in her left eye ache as Leader approached her from behind. "What the hell was that?"

Were Shiki more playful she would have responded with a question as to what Leader meant. She wasn't playful, not anymore. Not after what happened. She decided to finish this conversation before it dragged on – they both had better things to do.

"She pissed me off. With her attitude and her face."

"That face and attitude are your face and attitude, and well as mine."

"They were mine. I grew up."

"She's still you, what you once were."

"No, she's not." A flash of a memory, rows of tanks filled with doppelgängers, doomed to die. Would they have been different than her? Would they have made the same choices she did? The same mistakes? She shook her head to chase away the unnecessary thoughts. "And even if she was, I'd still hate her like I hate myself when I was like that."

A hand on her shoulder. She almost recoiled at the touch, but she controlled herself. "I know, but don't let that interfere with what we have planned."

"Fat good all those plans are doing if even the Angels are doing the unexpected. Fucking combo Angel. What if he gets hurt because we can't prepare for what we don't know is coming?!"

"No plan survives first contact, Shiki. We adapt. We improvise. We overcome. We ensure his safety. He'll be fine as long as we're here."

"Hmph." The scent of blood filled the air as her eye looked toward the apparition that haunted her every waking moment. "I hope you're right, Leader. I don't want to see him hurt."

"None of us do, but we can't account for everything. So, you gonna continue to cause problems for Big Asuka?"

"No promises, but I'll try to reign it in. But if she starts something, I'll be the one to finish it."

Leader sighed. "That's the best I'm going to get. Alright, I've got a meeting to get to. I'll catch you later." Leader disappeared into an air vent to plan as she and her cronies were wont to do.

Shiki stood up and moved from her perch at the edge of Shinji's bed, moving towards his sleeping form. "I'm not going to forgive you if you die on me, idiot," she muttered, placing her hand on his neck, the steady beat of his pulse settling her nerves. She didn't need to sleep, but she made a habit of napping in his chest pocket for this reason. His pulse, his heartbeat, she wanted to feel them whenever she could to make sure he was still there. Still alive.

"…." She could feel the apparition behind her, spectral blood dripping onto the futon below her. She grabbed Shinji's neck, feeling his pulse ring through her body.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, the words falling on deaf ears.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kaworu once again found himself in front of the bathroom mirror, eye brimming with pain. His reflection once more started to move independently of him.

"T̵a̵b̵r̴i̵s̵,̵ ̷h̶a̵v̸e̵ ̸y̴o̸u̷ ̸a̶l̶r̷e̸a̶d̵y̷ ̶c̵o̴m̵p̵l̵e̸t̶e̸d̶ ̷y̸o̶u̶r̷ ̴n̵e̶w̶ ̴m̷i̵s̴s̶i̸o̴n̶?̴" It spoke to him once again like nails against a chalkboard mixed with the death knell of a civilization.

"I have," Kaworu ground out. "No thanks to your vague directions."

His reflection shrugged at him. "I̸t̷ ̴i̶s̷ ̵a̸l̸w̶a̷y̵s̵ ̷i̸n̸ ̴a̶ ̷d̸i̴f̵f̸e̷r̷e̵n̵t̴ ̷l̵o̵c̸a̶t̴i̸o̶n̷,̷ ̴b̵u̴t̸ ̵w̷i̷t̸h̶i̴n̶ ̸t̵h̷e̶ ̴s̷a̴m̵e̷ ̴g̵e̸n̸e̷r̴a̷l̵ ̵a̵r̶e̶a̷.̸ ̸I̵ ̸h̵a̷d̶ ̷n̵o̷ ̸d̵o̴u̸b̵t̸ ̸y̵o̷u̵ ̴w̴o̵u̵l̵d̸ ̸b̵e̶ ̷a̴b̸l̷e̴ ̶t̸o̵ ̷f̷i̴n̴d̴ ̴i̵t̷ ̴e̶a̸s̶i̴l̴y̸ ̸w̴i̷t̴h̵ ̷t̶h̸a̷t̵.̸"

"Yes, well, it wasn't easy! I had to ask around in a local village, and my Russian is rusty." Kaworu let out a sigh. "And they kept talking about how the facility was haunted by a murderous wolf-skinned child possessed by a fallen angel that butchered people!"

His reflection raised an eyebrow. "W̸a̵s̴ ̴i̷t̷ ̶h̴a̵u̷n̶t̸e̴d̸?̶" it asked with genuine curiosity.

"No, it's just a very ominous location."

His reflection was unamused. "T̴a̷b̷r̵i̸s̷,̶ ̶y̷o̴u̶ ̵a̷r̵e̵ ̸a̴n̶ ̵a̶n̵g̷e̷l̴ ̸w̶i̴t̵h̸ ̴a̸n̸ ̵o̵r̷g̷a̸n̴ ̴t̶h̷a̸t̷ ̶g̴i̶v̶e̵s̸ ̷y̶o̵u̸ ̵n̵e̶a̶r̸ ̴l̴i̷m̶i̷t̸l̸e̴s̶s̴ ̵e̵n̶e̵r̶g̵y̵ ̷a̸n̸d̷ ̷y̴o̷u̷ ̴h̵a̸v̶e̶ ̷t̶h̴e̶ ̴a̴b̵i̷l̶i̸t̷y̴ ̴t̵o̸ ̶p̵r̸o̴j̷e̵c̴t̴ ̷y̷o̷u̷r̴ ̴s̶o̶u̶l̴ ̴i̵n̵ ̴b̶o̸t̷h̸ ̴a̷ ̵d̷e̴f̷e̶n̴s̶i̴v̴e̵ ̷a̷n̶d̸ ̵o̸f̴f̷e̸n̸s̷i̴v̶e̵ ̶m̴a̷n̵n̸e̵r̸.̴ ̶W̶h̵y̴ ̸a̶r̷e̶ ̵y̵o̸u̷ ̶a̸f̶r̶a̸i̷d̶ ̸o̷f̷ ̷a̵ ̴m̴y̴t̸h̶?̴"

"It's…. well….. when you put it like that, I guess there isn't a reason to be afraid," Kaworu admitted begrudgingly. "Anyway, what else do I have to do?"

"N̷o̴t̵h̶i̶n̷g̵ ̷f̷o̵r̶ ̶t̶h̸e̴ ̸t̵i̸m̵e̵ ̷b̴e̷i̷n̵g̸.̷ ̷T̶h̵e̷ ̵g̴r̸o̷u̶n̷d̴w̷o̸r̸k̵ ̵h̷a̸s̸ ̸b̵e̷e̴n̴ ̷l̵a̶i̵d̸,̷ ̴n̷o̸w̷ ̷I̵ ̴n̷e̸e̴d̶ ̸o̶n̵l̴y̴ ̶b̷u̵i̶l̴d̴ ̶u̷p̷o̸n̸ ̸i̷t̷.̷"

"And Shinji's safety is guaranteed?"

The reflection scoffs at him. "Y̸e̸s̷,̵ ̶I̷ ̸a̴m̵ ̴o̶f̷ ̴m̵y̷ ̶w̵o̵r̶d̵.̸ ̴I̸ ̶w̸i̸l̷l̶ ̴n̶o̶t̸ ̸i̶n̴t̷e̵n̴t̸i̸o̷n̸a̷l̸l̸y̶ ̶h̵a̴r̵m̵ ̵S̵h̴i̷n̴j̵i̸ ̵I̷k̴a̴r̴i̸ ̴a̴s̷ ̶l̷o̶n̵g̸ ̷a̸s̸ ̸y̸o̵u̴ ̴d̵r̵a̷w̴ ̴b̵r̴e̴a̵t̴h̴.̵"

"What about what you did to my sibling - will you repeat what you did with Gaghiel?"

"T̷h̴a̵t̴ ̵w̷a̷s̷ ̴n̸o̵t̶ ̵m̴y̶ ̸d̵o̴i̶n̷g̴.̴ ̵T̶h̵a̴t̵ ̴w̶a̷s̷…̵.̸.̵ ̵u̶n̶e̷x̸p̷e̷c̷t̵e̶d̷.̷ ̴P̷e̷r̶h̵a̶p̴s̴ ̴a̵ ̶s̶i̵d̴e̶ ̶e̸f̸f̸e̴c̸t̴ ̶o̴f̵ ̵t̴h̸e̵ ̸i̵n̵s̸t̷a̸b̵i̵l̶i̵t̸y̷ ̵o̵f̵ ̵t̸h̴i̶s̸ ̶c̸y̴c̵l̵e̴.̸"

Kaworu's eyes narrowed. There was that term again, cycle. What did it mean by that?

"One more thing before you go, if I may?" The reflection stared at him but made no motion of refusal. "I was wondering if you had a name. If we are working together, it would only be cordial to know each other's name."

The reflection pursed its mouth into a thin line, mulling about his words. "A̵ ̸n̶a̸m̵e̸?̶ ̸I̴ ̵h̷a̷v̶e̴ ̶n̷e̸v̵e̵r̸ ̷p̸o̵s̶s̶e̸s̸s̶e̴d̵ ̴a̵ ̸n̵a̵m̴e̴ ̷b̸e̷f̸o̸r̵e̷.̶ ̷I̵ ̸h̶a̶v̶e̷ ̴h̴e̸a̸r̸d̷ ̷s̵o̶m̵e̶w̸h̴e̷r̷e̸ ̶t̴h̶a̶t̶ ̶g̷i̶v̶i̶n̴g̸ ̷s̷o̴m̴e̴t̴h̶i̵n̸g̸ ̷a̷ ̵n̴a̵m̸e̸ ̸i̸s̸ ̷t̷h̸e̴ ̴f̵i̴r̸s̵t̵ ̷s̸t̵e̴p̶ ̴i̸n̷ ̵k̸i̸l̷l̴i̵n̶g̵ ̷i̶t̷.̵" Kaworu's eyes widened in shock. Would it see his request as an act of rebellion? "F̵o̷r̵ ̶l̸a̸c̷k̴ ̸o̷f̴ ̵a̸n̷y̶t̸h̸i̶n̸g̸ ̷e̵l̴s̵e̷ ̴t̵o̴ ̷c̷a̵l̷l̷ ̸m̵y̸s̵e̵l̸f̷,̷ ̸y̵o̷u̷ ̴m̸a̵y̵ ̴r̶e̷f̵e̸r̵ ̸t̶o̷ ̶m̶e̷ ̸a̴s̸ ̶E̶n̵i̵g̸m̵a̷.̶"

"But you just said-"

"I̷ ̸k̸n̸o̵w̶ ̸w̷h̶a̸t̴ ̷I̵ ̷s̴a̵i̴d̴.̶" The newly dubbed Enigma cut him off. "I̸f̸ ̷y̶o̸u̴ ̷f̸e̸e̶l̷ ̶y̵o̴u̶ ̴c̸a̴n̸ ̶k̷i̵l̸l̵ ̶m̵e̴,̶ ̷y̷o̴u̷ ̸a̷r̵e̵ ̴w̷e̷l̸c̴o̷m̶e̷ ̶t̷o̷ ̵t̴r̶y̶.̵ ̸N̷o̴w̵ ̴I̵ ̴m̸u̴s̷t̷ ̷g̸o̷,̴ ̵t̵h̴e̶r̸e̴ ̴i̸s̴ ̴m̶u̷c̸h̴ ̸I̸ ̷m̵u̵s̵t̶ ̸d̴o̵ ̸T̶a̷b̵r̸i̶s̵.̶" Kaworu's reflection returned to mirroring him, leaving him alone once more.

"Patience," he whispered to himself. "I will see Shinji soon enough, and all will be well."

Kaworu exited the bathroom and flopped onto his bed, clinging to the thoughts of that beautiful soul like a drowning man clinging to a piece of driftwood.

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Gendo Ikari sat at his desk, reading the various Section 2 reports on the Pilots, focusing on Rei and Shinji in particular. Rei's behavior, while odd, was not in and of itself concerning. He had determined that Rei's loyalty was still sound despite her strange obsession with vengeance. Then there was Shinji. Many would claim that Gendo didn’t care about Shinji. This was false - there was a part of Gendo that absolutely cared about Shinji. This part, however, had been beaten and thrown into a dark prison within his mind so as not to interfere with his plans. Even with that, he could never hate him. Shinji was proof of his and Yui's love.

"Slight altercation with the daughter of a U.N. diplomat?" Gendo grimaced slightly more than usual. He hoped Shinji would take more after Yui and not him, or else Yui would be cross with him when she returned and saw Shinji getting into fights. He closed the file, deciding it was time for a break. He opened his desk drawer, revealing a bottle of scotch and an old cell phone, Yui's. He always kept it close at hand, hoping to give it back to her when she returned, but she would probably just get the newest model when that happened. He poured a finger's worth into a glass and began nursing it. He turned his chair around and gazed out into the Geofront.

"Yui, would you approve of what I've done to get you back? Would you have done the same to get me back if I was devoured by that beast?" He received no response. Well, except for the constant screaming, that is.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

It seemed like a good idea at the time. Graft Adam onto his hand in preparation for Complementation. It was going well until the grafting was complete and the unceasing screaming started.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

The fact that only he could hear it was just icing on the cake. He hated the constant noise that was like driving an ice pick through his temple, giving him a migraine to end all migraines.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

His alcohol intake had increased dramatically, and he wasn’t sure his liver would survive until Complementation. But it was the only way to dull the scream.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

But Gendo would persevere. He had already done so much to ensure his success – what was a little screaming to bring his beloved back?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

"I wonder how hard it would be to get access to hallucinogenic drugs?" Gendo wondered aloud, before deciding to forgo a glass and drink straight from the bottle. No matter what, his Scenario would not be impeded.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

No matter what.




Notes:“So a lot of things happened in this chapter. First and foremost, I cannot find any info about the mobile game Evangelion Gaiden without being redirected to something about Apex Legends, so I cannot prove or disprove whether Nene's teddy bear is actually possessed or not. So instead of worrying about it, I made something up, and that something is an imprisoned demon. Hitomi Amagi is a character from another Evangelion mobile game, Evangelion Battlefields, and is a bridge crew member as well as a mental health counselor. Our mysterious shadow being finally has a name and a plan. Wonder what he's cooking up? Finally, Gendo is not having a good time, seems Adam is in some sort of a mood. Well, I'm sure he'll be fine. Tune in next time for Israfel! Until then, hope you enjoy, leave a review if you want, and have a pleasant day.”